cutebunny

Thank you so much for your reply and it makes sense because i remember how my other thoughts passed like that too. Thank you a lot

Hello! These days i have had a rollercoaster of feelings and thoughts. I'm a female and i have another female friend I'm very close with. We did many things together and we mean a lot to each other. This past month I'm scared of that I like her. I sometimes get attracted by females but i don't see myself dating one and it gives me anxiety to think im dating a female. I'm from a homophobic country maybe that's why. But when i had a crush in past i always had on boys and it would make me excited and I'd want to get these boys' attention. Now with my friend, i got upset when i heard that she made out with her male friends. I never made out with someone, i just had small kisses when i had dates and i avoided doing anything more (with boys) and i wish i went further than that. Do i feel jealous of my friend herself or the fact that i never made out? It gives me anxiety to talk with her now and i don't want to feel this way. I don't want to fall for her. Is this my ocd, because i did have ocd thoughts with other female friends that felt real but then i realized they were just ocd. Also, when i would have a crush, i wouldn't have this heavy feeling in my head but i have it now. I always have it when i get ocd thoughts. Please say it's my ocd because I'm not okay.

Thank you for your replies, you're right it's not that important how it started. Also, I've been getting treatment for my ocd, since sept 2015 but we haven't talked about the assault much. It did traumatize me and I've grown phobia towards some stuff that were linked to that moment.

Hello guys! So it's a night for me where I remember something that happened to me 4 years ago and I'm crying right now. I was sexually assaulted on the street. And a few days later i was followed by a man in the metro, both incidents left a huge impact on me as to where I'd have panic attacks in public transportation. (That's what I named them, I'd be nervous and my heart would beat fast and squeeze and I'd control everyone looking my way) I keep remembering the moment i was assaulted and i feel so bad even though it wasn't my fault at all. Recently I got into thinking, the incident happened in September 2014 and I started having sexual ocd thoughts in January 2015. I did have ocd before, I'd think my loved ones would pass away if i didn't perform some actions such as praying, touching on a table, putting my book on that particular place. But sexual ocd started a few months after those events. I'd like to have your opinions. Is it a coincidence that i started having sexual ocd in 2015, at the age of 19 or was it from the assaults I've been through?

Hello! i had an amazing weekend because i saw a band i love live. On Saturday i was at the airport to greet them, one of the members smiled at me and the other one liked my photo on Instagram. On Sunday i was at the concert and i had the time of my life. after the concert i have been so upset as i was looking forward to it till now. They left my country today and i feel like I’ll never see them again but i want to. Remembering the concert made me really happy yesterday and today but now it just hurts me and i keep getting anxiety attacks. Maybe it’s not just that, it could be that my mom forced me to shop for shoes and i hate shopping with all my heart. I have adhd too so i get bored easily especially if I’m not interested. is it normal that the thought of the concert gives me anxiety now?

Thank you for replying and yes, i guess i need to set up an appointment soon

Hi there, i was doing fine for like a month I guess? Now here I am, questioning my sexuality. Thing is i have a fetish that i can’t explain to no one about a body part. I Watch videos of it on youtube, usually of men (I’m a woman) but recently i really enjoy watching videos from this woman. Yes, i do masturbate to that and get turned on by it. Does this mean I’m bisexual? Also i have intrusive thoughts of having a crush on an internet friend i enjoy talking with. Do i really have a crush on her? Or is it my ocd?

Hello, so i have an exam this Tuesday and it's important because i might fail a class for the second time. I can't focus to study I'm also discouraged. Moreover, i spend too much time on social media. yesterday, on my fan account i saw about a fan a year younger than me, i am 21. But she's a pedophile and she writes sexual things about underage celebs and dated a 12 year old. I got so triggered because I'm afraid of being a pedo. I slept well till 9 am and i fell asleep again till 10:30. Meanwhile i saw a dream where i did sth kinky with someone i shouldn't with. I woke up with a feeling on my clitoris, a feeling that comes from joy. I felt so bad. I went to meet a friend i haven't seen for 5 years and we had a good time but all of an sudden while we were eating my heart started to beat fast. She came home w me. I thought that i might hav sexual feelings for her. But i didnt do anything. At home i tried to study but then i started crying from all the stress. I opened my fan account on twitter and I saw my favorite member of my favorite group. A fan commented that his eyes are red and i then realized it. I love him so much and i don't want hin to be sad. I felt like dying because he's sad and he's sad of fame, i am his fan so i make him sad. I think of suicide a lot today. Please help me. Am i a pervert? Why do i feel this way about a man that will never see me?

Fear of holes Some say it's not real but I firmly believe it is, because those pictures of holes really disturb me. Also I am disgusted by things being stuck/embedded in each other. Like ingrown hair, my legs had quite a lot of them and i'd hurt trying to get rid of them, my legs are still covered with their bruises. There was construction of pavements in my campus during fall, which resulted in leaves being covered under cement, you can still see the leaves under it and i feel so uncomfortable, I get shivers thinking about them. Also something so weird just happened. I was eating watermelon and I saw seeds in it, like 10 or something in a small piece. It irked me and i found it very disgusting, now i feel nauseous. Is it a real phobia? Is it related to my ocd? Anyone feeling the same way?

I am bad at giving advices or so at ocd but all i can say is you're unfortunate about your neighbors. Breathing exercises can help you distract from those thoughts along with muscle relaxing exercises.

I couldn't find a better title so here it goes my family are conservative Muslims, they're modern, we live in Turkey which is secular, we go to swim together with every gender, we don't wear headscarves. but still they believe Islam strongly. I have been raised like that. But now I don't really know if I am still a Muslim. I am fed up with the community and them being overly conservative. I also don't understand why God would send religions. Anyways, I'm not gonna discuss these. Today is the first day of Ramadan and i didn't fast, i wouldn't if I was still a Muslim because i have finals to study for. But today the conversation i had with my friends came to Ramadan and she said she's an atheist so she doesn't know so why don't I know. I replied her:"Well, I'm a deist" also on twitter this girl kept saying:"why do atheists criticize only Islam?" Referrig to Turkish atheists i think. I felt the need to explain that they criticize their own environment and i mentioned that I'm a a deist. But now i feel bad for saying I'm a deist and i want to go back to Islam because I'm scared of hell. Though i still don't understand why God would need us to believe in a religion. However, i think doors of Islam are closed for me and God and prophet Mohammad won't accept me back. Also i have been hung up on a music group and i have been listening to their songs and watching their interviews a lot recently. I wake up and look for their news. Now even they make me stressed. I had an anxiety attack in library for hours and now I'm in my place because i couldn't take it anymore. Are these normal? Can i go back to Islam? Will that music group make me happy again?

Hi, i am here with something stupid again so on twitter, tumblr and instagram maybe some of you have noticed but everyone "wants to die" lately. Idk how many of them literally means it but i don't, i need to see a few things first, like i have a few reasons to live. For example finals week:"i wanna die" or seeing a hot picture of someone:"i wanna die" etc the other morning i said:"i hope this choker actually chokes me and i ***" then a few hours later i noticed something odd on my skin, i feared it could be cancerous (turned out it was harmless, but could be God's call) and like 10 minutes ago, i was watching a video of a band i like and this member gives me feelings of happiness and admiration. He smiled and i literally whispered:"oh my God i want to die" and i then remembered tonight is an important night in our religion and my "prayer" is death when i don't really want it. It sounds so stupid but i don't really think of it as literally dying when i say it. That's just a popular thing to say and my mouth is used to it now. im not even that religious but my obsessions have been about religion too. And about death. Now i don't want to literally die. But why do i keep saying it? Maybe i made God mad and i will actually die...

thank you so much, i saw this earlier but couldn't reply because i was on my phone. whenever the intrusive thought came i thought ''it's just on paper'' and an update: i messaged him and he replied back, we will be meeting soon i'm not head over heels for him right now but i'm really happy he accepted. Thanks everyone

This is so true, i have compulsive thoughts about not forgetting him and even harming others because of that when these are almost non correlated. Yeah, i kind of believe in fairytales so I do think only one person is the one and love at first sight is real. Not really reasonable. i will try to be more social from now on. And gonna try to focus on my classes even though i have adhd too. Thanks so much

^^ Thanks for your replies Also, my mom said the exact same thing as you snowbear, she said i can't know i'm in love with him because we have barely even spoken. I suck at lovelife, i have experienced relationship but i'm still so naive i guess. I think i need to focus on my future more instead of this. Which I never do. Or I should interact with my friends more. My fear is that what if i never forget him? What if we are true for each other? and all that goes with it. i want a healthy relationship, i really do. I want to have a family with a nice man. I'm only 21 but i'm afraid of not finding that person. Maybe that's why I am so obsessed with him.