You've done exactly what we have paul, you think you're doing the right thing but I've read so many articles that state otherwise, I've removed the spray today and I'm now in my daughters bad books, her room isn't filthy but she's not bothered about mess around her bed it's just the bed itself that has to be cleaned, also had the same issue as you with the hand gel! I'm just thinking if I remove those things that she uses for the compulsions then she can't do them and will then have to face up to the anxiety...not sure if this is the right action to take.
yes my daughter sees certain people as being contaminated and she won't hug us anymore..it's difficult but I'm trying to be supportive.