Lancslass53

Hi all Don't know if any of this will help you but it may. I decided to do something about my terrible health ocd and anxiety and booked myself in to a counsellor. It costs me a bit but I feel it's worth it. Upshot is as I had an horrendous childhood and spent every day in a constant state of anxiety trying to protect my brother and me I've reacted to that from the age of about 8 by having severe anxiety and OCD (I'm 64 now all those wasted years!). We are working through it and there's been a lot of crying and despair but I feel I now know why I have these debilitating conditions and am understanding now how to deal with them - I don't know if it's the same for any of you but sometimes you do have to look at past situations as trying to distract yourself in the present doesn't always work. I just thought I'd let you know if you're having conselling to hang in there - hope you all don't mind me posting just wanted to let you know there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Here again - been having a really hard time trying to not ruminate and test myself. Have applied finally for therapy as deep down I know all my problems stem from ocd and acute anxiety. Does anyone know if it's a physical disease of the brain or an imbalance in brain chemistry as I've had this since I was about eight years old? Am curious.

Thanks both for your replies. I've tried to get to see someone for CBT but I cannot get any help from my GP. I did see one counsellor a while ago but he told me to read the Mr Men books particularly Mr Worry! I have decided to volunteer at my library and kick my husband up the bum and get out and about - he's a bit of a couch potato which drives me mad sometimes! Thanks again, sometimes you just need to be told what you already suspect is the way to go.

I finished full time work in May and now do 2.5 days a week which is great BUT I now think that because I've effectively retired at age 64 that now is the time that everything will go wrong with my health especially develop dementia. I have had two episodes of forgetfulness that have scared me a lot as I really don't know where items were put or if I even put them somewhere!! And as I suffer from bad OCC that I do my best to control, I am convinced I have started with dementia! I thought finishing full-time work would be easy but m really finding it hard to adjust plus we need to leave our rented house for an over 50s housing development which is reinforcing my old age fears. I know this all may seem trivial but I can't sleep properly and am terrified of ill health as above. I just feel that I want to close my eyes and never wake up again.

Yep you're right - just wondered.

Is ocd a fault in the brain? The distressing symptoms etc are surely caused by something? I too suffered as a child I now realise but I would have thought a child wouldn't develop emotional trauma so young or am I being naive?

Oooh I'm not doing too well at all I know it's the ocd causing my fears but sometimes they really do feel real. My ocd is my house is haunted and anytime there is the slightest noise or something falls down I am convinced it's a ghost or poltergeist - typing this makes me see how foolish I am but today I can't help it! Sorry.

Just what I needed to hear today as having a wobble after being brave and accepting all week! Gives me strength to keep going! Thanks all

Hi just to say I've just joined The Big White Wall which is more anonymous than on here but you could join that (it's free) and maybe someone on there could advise you on private treatment in your area. My GP directed me to Healthy Minds here in Lancashire and I've had a phone triage withjn 2 days and should have an appointment in the next 3 weeks. Hope that helps.

Hi thanks Bob it's pretty frightening thinking you've got to such a point with your illness that you can alter your thought process. Anyway you are right ocd moves on to something else in time I've lost count of the things it's latched on to I've started yoga which does relax me. I hope you get some peace in time. Take care

Hi Bob34 I have some reason to feel like I do as I saw my razor move from the soap shelf in the shower, jump across the shower and hit the glass and fall down. I was very calm and didn't think anything about it thought it might be my mum or dad but have been signed off work with severe stress and anxiety so spent time checking it out online and it grew from harmless to totally freaking out. I did read that in a high stage of anxiety you may imagine stuff but it looked real to me. I am now a complete wreck every time I hear a noise etc. It does seem I have no way out and just want to go to sleep and never wake up again as I can't live like this but am trying to rationalise it as much as possible - any suggestions would be most welcome!!!

Oh Helen I'm so sorry you are feeling this bad. I too am feeling pretty rough and have felt like doing just the same thing but try to hang on. Please don't think I'm being silly but I used lavender oil quite a lot of it at night and inhaled it while trying to sleep and it worked for me I found it dulled my mind enough to slip off. There are a lot of people who know exactly how you are feeling, that usually helps me.

I'm currently convinced we have a ghost or presence in the house!!!! How do you get over that one? So what do I do? Straight on to websites relating to this and absolutely scared myself witless - shaking, being sick with worry etc also going round the house talking to it!! But I think this is a symptom of my severe ocd it can latch on to any fears

Hi everyone Thank you for all your good wishes I must admit at first I thought being told not to ruminate and seek reassurance etc was a bit harsh but I tried it this morning saying to myself what was the worst thing that could happen? and hey presto the answer wasn't that bad. I am still mentally extremely fragile and physically sick but I will do my best to conquer my fears. I wish you all the very best in your struggle I'll definitely keep on here now.

Thanks Lisa I am going to try CBT hopefully soon. I am currently going through a pretty bad patch at the moment - acute stress at work has snowballed into thoughts about the house being haunted!!! I'm hanging on by a thread really.