Ironing Maiden

Hi folks! Just wanted to come back to this thread for a bit of an update. So after my last post i found it did take me a few weeks to get my anxiety under control as i was constantly worrying about thieves going around which in turn pushed all my checking habits through the roof! But over the last couple of weeks i have really pushed hard with my exposure exercises and feel i have made pretty good progress! Before when i was getting ready to go to bed i would take somewhere around half an hour checking things (mainly in the kitchen) before i felt happy enough to go to bed. I would literally go around the entire kitchen checking EVERYTHING (fridge closed, microwave/toaster off, wall switches/oven off, taps off, lights off, door locked etc) it was physically and mentally draining! This routine would also happen if i was leaving the house to go out for the day. (Although my checks would then extend to upstairs stuff like shower off, windows closed etc) Now i am at the stage where all i need to check is the door is locked and that is it! ? I have found that out of everything, i find checking the doors are locked is still my main and toughest checking habit to break but i know i just need to keep chipping away at it, it feels bloody awful but i'll get there eventually! So just wanted to thank all you lovely lot for your support and advice and hopefully spread some positivity

Yeah it's the sheer frustration of it all that drives me nuts, i know it's silly and illogical yet my mind just wont accept it. Especially first thing in the morning, by the time i'm in the car driving to work i am usually pent up with anger and frustration at myself due to how long i have just had to spend doing something i know is ridiculous. I've tried to not let it bother me too much today, i went over to see my folks today so as i was getting ready to leave the house i tried to do my exposure techniques to try and get back into the swing of it. Thing is i feel like it's a little easier when i know i am only leaving the house for a short amount of time (compared to when i am away all day at work) i'm not sure why this time difference makes any difference to my checking need but it definitely does feel different. Today i made sure to not make too much of a fuss about checking the windows and i managed that relatively ok, checking the bathroom taps and shower is off wasn't too bad either (still over checked a bit), same with the kitchen taps/toaster off etc. My main thing still seems to be the doors (back door in kitchen and front door) because i am checking the back door in the kitchen i tend to take longer checking that as my neighbours can't see me do it but with my front door i actively try not to make too much of a fuss as i don't want my neighbours seeing me doing it and thinking 'wtf?'. I know it will just take time again and i just need to keep pushing through but it's definitely not easy that's for sure! ?

Hi everyone, Before i start my post i just want to say the last thing i want to do is to upset or trigger someone's anxiety so if you suffer quite severe OCD (especially checking) then maybe skip this one or read with caution. So i have an issue with over checking certain things, i have done for a while but it has only really become a big issue since last year when i moved into my own house (live alone). Basically it revolves around checking things are turned off/windows closed/doors locked etc before i can go to bed or leave the house. Up until a few weeks ago i was working hard on exposure exercises and making a tiny bit of progress and was able to reduce my checking down to quite a noticeable difference and was feeling really good about it. The neighbourhood i live in is a quiet suburban street on the outskirts of a city, there has never been any trouble here (that i am aware of!) in the year i have lived here, naively i began to believe that nothing bad would ever happen here as we are so far away from the bad areas of town (silly i know). A few weeks ago i found out that there had been thieves going around at night checking cars (i assume to see if any were unlocked or there was an opportunity to smash and grab) but none of my neighbours (or myself) had been hit so they must have moved on empty handed. Even though i wasn't targeted (my car is kept in a garage overnight) my anxiety has shot up through the roof! It's like i have not only went back to square one with my checking but i am worse than what i was before, it is taking me double the time and my biggest issue is making sure that the doors are locked. I have taken so long to check that i was nearly late for work last week and it sometimes takes me half an hour/45 mins to check the house is safe and locked up before i feel comfortable going to bed for the night. Has anyone been through something similar or have any advice? because the thought of me getting back to where i was before with my progress feels like a million miles away. I know i need to keep going with my exposure exercises but this has really knocked my confidence and unsettled me that it feels harder than before.

It's definitely not a compulsion to confess scenario, it's more of a what's the best way to explain to them what OCD and CBT is in a way that wont worry them too much...type of thing. I have a good relationship with my folks so i know they will be supportive, my dad had depression a few years back and has been doing well with recovery so we are fine with discussing mental health issues, it's just the initial sitting them down part and telling them. I do like the idea of writing it down first so i have a good idea of what to say, i just get tongue tied when i am explaining things sometimes. Thank you for the replies!

I wasn't sure wether to put this thread here or in the family part of the forum (apologies to the admins if i got it wrong! ) So in about 2 weeks time i am going to see a therapist regarding my issues with checking. This is the first time i have ever spoke to anyone about my OCD, so i have never actually been told officially that i have OCD, just having done a lot of research (through this website and many others) i can safely assume that i do have (possibly a mild form of) it. I have never discussed my problems with my family either, although i think my folks may have a suspicion as i lived at home recently before getting my own house. So they may have noticed certain things i did that stood out to them. Like i said i think i only have a mild form of OCD so certain things i do aren't majorly obvious to others. So as i am due to go to my appointment soon i'm nervous about the prospect of having to tell my folks i am going to see a therapist as i think this will be a surprise to them as i don't think they really know the full extent of my problem. I considered just not mentioning anything but to be honest i don't want to lie and i know there will be times when i'll need their support. So how do you go about explaining to family? What's the best way to approach this? Has anyone else had to sit family down and talk them through OCD, CBT, therapy etc? Thanks for reading!

i second what cookiemonster said as i found my OCD/anxiety went through the roof the day after a night out. Might be a bit too late to mention this now but maybe in future try and avoid looking to alcohol as it will most likely make you feel worse :-(

Had a good few days recently then Saturday had a night out having a few drinks, which meant Sunday was spent feeling hungover/pretty damn rough which always seems to send my checking ocd/anxiety into overdrive So back to working on exposure therapy and building on it...and sticking with good old tea from now on!!!

Thank you! taking baby steps but will get there x

i like the way it is written in plain everyday language and not in confusing medical jargon

Funny you mention that as i do work in a hospital! haha

i downloaded the Break Free from OCD book onto my kindle the other day (as recommended by you lovely folk on here!). Been sat outside in the garden having a wee read with a brew, have read through quite a bit already, it's very interesting how it explains and goes into detail Plus today i tried to minimise the amount of checking i usually do when i leave the house, few things like taps/lights are getting ok-ish...but those pesky doors have still got a long way to go!

i've had the '-what if I kiss my boss/someone at work during a meeting?' one, no idea why though...my boss is annoying!

Thanks gingerbreadgirl! It was between that and something harry potter related! haha. I will do, i think it will feel strange talking to someone face to face about my OCD as i have never told anyone that i have these problems, pretty sure my mum knows though. I've been watching videos on youtube about ocd and it is strange to see just how similar other folks rituals are to mine! I know what you mean Avo, the heat just totally zapz all my energy and i end up spending the evening chilling on the sofa instead of unpacking! Although tonight i did make the most of the lovely weather and spent an hour in the garden pottering about (it may sound like i know something about gardening...but i really don't!) haha now i'll have to wait till next week to see if my flower planting skills are any good or not...

Thanks for the welcome folks! All is well at new house, although i've been here a month and there is still several bags to unpack...need motivation! haha. How are you getting on at your new house Avo? The place i'm going to does do CBT amongst other treatments so i will make sure to mention it when i go for first appointment. Speaking of which i got my appointment date through for 1st August, feeling all fine right now, just excited to get started Hope you're all having a good day!

Hi everyone, I've been a bit of a long time lurker but never felt the need to actually post as i always felt my issues were not 'that' bad (hint: trying to deny and put off they actually were bad!). So i have had an issue with checking for a good number of years now, i think maybe at the very least 10 years is how far back i can remember having these issues. I genuinely believe my previous career may have been, not so much the cause but definitely played an important role in me developing these feelings of uncertainty, anxiety, the overwhelming urge to constantly check things. About a month ago something pretty awesome happened...i bought my first house and finally moved in! So although i am absolutely chuffed to bits to have my own space, the downside to it is i have realised just how bad my checking really is. It never bothered me too much before as i was living with my parents, but now i am finding that something as simple as leaving the house to go to work will take me roughly 20-30 mins of going around the whole house checking things before i am happy that everything is ok. I will check taps, switches, hair straighteners, windows, doors etc. It is the feeling of sheer frustration that gets me as i know my checks are not needed! Yet i can't help it. So i end up going to work in the morning wound up and anxious and that's before i've had to deal with customers! haha. Not to mention the thought of my new neighbours seeing me as i fumble about with my front door. I think i may have stood at the back door yesterday checking the handle for a good ten minutes before i was able to tear myself away Just realised how long this post is, apologies! So i guess my reason for posting is that tonight i finally decided enough was enough, i've been trying to break my habits myself for a long time and got nowhere, i know i need proper professional guidance, so i sent an email off to a local therapist group that deals with anxiety, OCD, plus many other issues. I'd like to maybe update every so often as i go through the therapy just to relay my thoughts and maybe keep a bit of a log of my progress plus if it helps anyone considering therapy who may be a little anxious then hopefully it might put their mind at ease. Right i better get off, goodnight everyone!