Good afternoon all and Happy Easter!
My name's Harry and I've had OCD for more or less three years, but most likely longer I suspect! I look forward to being an active member of this forum and hope to help a soul or two, and get a very pointers in return.
Before I start, I have recently referred myself for CBT and have ordered the book 'Break Free from OCD'. I look forward to both, can't come quick enough!
Anyhow, I've over the last few weeks really started to recognise my compulsions, even the things I didn't think were. There is a lot of advice and tips on OCD, a few things I find contradictory here and there... i.e.... do you engage with thoughts, or not?
Anyway, one problem I have identified myself with is fear. Quelle surprise, hein? My fears tend to be literally anything these days that is self-destructive. I've noticed many people may have one particular type and it seems to stay within the confines of that theme. Myself, on the other hand, I've had self-harm, harm to others, POCD, thoughts of being discriminatory and my most recent theme revolves around just being outright nasty on social media and to my closest family and friends.
In the end, it all revolves around fear and a fear of all that's good in my life will go. Where there is a lot to lose, my OCD will latch on.
I hope to be able to make a start on my journey to beat OCD in the coming weeks and months with CBT and a few good books, plus good company here. In the meantime, it'd be great to have a conversation with you about this aspect of OCD and perhaps a few pointers to get me on my way.
I understand these thoughts will be with me forever, it's just how I treat them and my sense of perspective. The one thought I had the other days was... "how does one have such horrible thoughts and be okay with it?" This is a conundrum I look forward to tackling.
Thanks all ?