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alyssa07

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About alyssa07

  • Birthday 07/07/1988

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  1. Hello all I hope everybody is doing well!? Just wondering if anybody has done DBT instead of CBT when getting therapy for their OCD. I have tried CBT before privately but now am being offered DBT under the NHS. I know CBT and ERP is considered the gold standard when it comes to treating OCD so I'm just a bit worried about why I'm being offered this instead? Although I do have a joint diagnosis of C-PTSD so it might have something to do with that? Any help would be appreciated! -Alyssa :))
  2. Yep! I experience this all the time unfortunately. Not a long term solution but when I'm at my worst points I find falling asleep with my tv on low volume with something relaxing or listening to music/podcasts really helps.
  3. Hello all! I’ve been really enjoying seeing all the posts about book recommendations and have been making my way through them all! I didn’t want to hijack anyone else’s post so I was just wondering if anyone who suffers from ‘magical thinking’ or religious ocd has any good book recommendations specifically for that theme ? I hope everyone is having a good 2022 so far! -Alyssa :))
  4. Thank you for the response and yes I think it may be this as OCD feeds off fear. I think in my brain it more played out as well I can see, hear and (probably because you guessed right I live in an urban area) walk through that alley safely, so there's more certainty to that than my intrusive thought coming true. Strange how the mind works sometimes...
  5. Hello everyone, A quick question about compulsions does anyone ever get compulsions to do something they fear ? Today I was walking whilst out and about an OCD thought suddenly told me that I should walk through this dark alley or x will happen. I'm not a fan of the dark and tend to avoid dodgy areas/shortcuts like this one but felt compelled to take the shortcut because I had anxiety from the thought. I tried to resist and reason that it was stupid alas ended up taking the shortcut anyways but as soon as I reached the end another thought popped into my brain that I have to circle back and take the shortcut again! I resisted this time and then when I got home found out I'd left one of my shopping items at the till and then the thought came back and told me that it was a sign because I hadn't completed the compulsion? I've never had OCD in a form like this, I thought compulsions were things that relieved anxiety not caused it? Anyone have any ideas? -Alyssa :))
  6. "The Self-Compassion Workbook for OCD" by Kimberley Quinlan is really good if you find you're hard on yourself sometimes
  7. Hello everyone I went to my GP today and on behalf of my CBT therapist to ask whether I could start taking Sertraline for my OCD. My GP started asking all these questions and then said she can’t prescribe me anything and has to make an urgent referral to the Mental Health Team because I was having what she called “ideas of reference”. I then ask if she could prescribe anything just to keep the anxiety down so I could starting eating/sleeping normally and she said to ask the mental health team. Later this morning I got a call back from the mental health team basically telling me they can’t prescribe me anything until I see the consultant which is next Monday. I know a week isn’t that long but I have really been reaching crisis point lately and tried to empathise that to the mental health team. They said they’d talk to the consultant about getting me diazepam to get me through to Monday but it’s looking doubtful. I just feel really frustrated as I’ve waited 3 weeks for this appointment and was assured by not only my therapist but our local mental health advice line that I’d be able to start on medication today. has anyone experienced similar ? Just feeling a bit down
  8. Thanks for reaching out Summer ? I'm finally getting on Sertraline tomorrow so I'm hoping it's going to reduce the fogginess and panic. I am really am looking forward to the day we can both laugh at OCD againI like to think I won against OCD yesterday even if it was one of my lowest points. Likewise I'm offering support to you too I'm not the most educated person on OCD ever but I am a listening ear. OCD-ers really are "god's strongest warriors" in my opinion and we will get through this!
  9. Hey all, I just wanted to share a positive experience I had yesterday evening. I've had an absolutely awful week (as I'm sure many others on here potentially had as well!) and that night was my breaking point. I was just trying to get through to tomorrow when I finally get put on some medication/talk to my gp and seriously considered going to A&E because I was concerned for my safety. I ended up phoning my local crisis line however and was referred to a skype-esque service my county offers. The lady I spoke to didn't really know anything about OCD apart from the base details and offered me advice on meditation I wasn't really able to accept at the time as I was in full panic mode, but we got talking and ended up finding common ground around spiritually/philosophy and she suggested for me to watch a TED Talk which I was worried would trigger my intrusive thoughts. It actually ended up being an informative talk by a woman who struggled with Schizophrenia. Although not the same as OCD I found parallels between the talkers story and my own experience which comforted me. I spent most of the call still anxious and distressed, but as we continued to talk I began to feel calmer and more distracted. This was the first time I had managed to calm down my anxiety in six days though and led me to be able to eat for the first time that day. I've used Samaritans before and unfortunately had a bad experience which led me to avoid crisis lines for a while! But there are truly so many beautiful people willing to help and listen and sympathise even if they don't have all the self-help and PHD knowledge of the world. I genuinely think if I had not picked up the phone I would have done something I'd regret. TLDR: Just highlighting never be afraid to reach out for help there's always options and people winning to listen and of course thank you to our amazing NHS workers & volunteers I hope you all have a lovely evening! -Alyssa :))
  10. Yep it sucks so bad I totally understand about going out and living a "normal life" OCD is such a handicap sometimes! You're so motivated and have so much time to get through this though! And in the long term a few months you took out to sort this out will 110% be worth it than having to deal with a lifetime of OCD (I'm on a break from Uni at the moment so trust me I understand about having to leave work ?) . Keep going with your goals you've got this!
  11. Hey Summer! Yep! Been there and done that and got the t-shirt? a couple of years ago before I even knew what OCD was... It's really tough and hindering on your life, I'm sorry you're missing out on work because of it that sucks ? As annoying as it probably is to read the only real way to start getting over it is to start exposing yourself to people and the outside. I started by going and sitting with my parents (whom I was avoiding) making sure I spent a little longer with them every time I did this and just engaging in conversation (had many panic attacks, it wasn't easy but you've got to persevere!) for the leaving house mine was only really reserved to night time (I lived in a very rough idea so going out at night was ironically a legitimate risk) but I went out with my dog every night, started from the bottom of the street and then went further each day! TLDR: ERP is the best way to beat this, yes it will get better, try not to engage with your thoughts but your surroundings and treat every person you walk past or time you leave the house as a victory! you will most certainly will get through this
  12. You always seem to be able to explain what I'm experiencing in words! THIS is exactly what it feels I also get what you mean about manifestation I was reading about the law of attraction and it helps me sometimes to think of intent vs. thoughts you have to really want something to make it work. I would attempt to manifest a winning lottery ticket but to be honest I am too lazy to spend my little energy on that?Would rather manifest my OCD away. And yes also this! It feels like I'm not preforming compulsions because my anxiety level is so high and in my mind doing compulsions eliminates anxiety which deep down I know is not necessarily true! Thank you for this! My anxiety has seemed to come down a bit since I made this post but about half an hour ago I misread something and thought it was one of my trigger words! It actually wasn't but my OCD told me it was and that I'm either misremembering/it did say my trigger word but the universe quickly changed it when I realised...I really cannot catch a break haha.
  13. It definitely does ! Especially when you don't want to abandon your entire belief system to get rid of the OCD As for saying it's a step towards something better I tried that and my brain kept countering with that this is a test and if I try to treat my OCD I'll go to hell (irrational when I write it out- but makes sense in my brain...). I'll actually try to turn my "pattern detector" off for a minute it actually helps to think about it like that, especially as I feel these patterns find me and not the other way around. I wish this wasn't so difficult, it really isn't easy but alas we got to keep trying.
  14. Thank you for your response @Darwinia I just find it very hard to relabel because of my belief system. I've grown up with religion and have heavily believed manifestation and "everything happens for a reason" all through my life. I try to relabel the thoughts but then my brain supplies me with a bucket load of "proof" that has not only occurred in the last few months but throughout my entire life. I just can't seem to convince myself as my brain has a counter for everything
  15. Hello all, I'm struggling at the moment as my OCD seems to have taken on a new form. I started seeing patterns in my usual triggers for harm OCD and started to think about whether there was a reason I was seeing more triggers than usual (as I have quite unusual ones that rarely spring up in everyday life.) I couldn't stop thinking about it and my thoughts were telling me I was seeing this because something awful was going to happen to me. I tried to chalk it up to coincidences and being hypersensitive to these things and told myself if it really was a sign from the universe that i would see *insert specific trigger* as I had never seen that before. Fast forward to the next day and I actually did see that trigger and it's sent me down a path of viewing everything as a sign and now I'm not even convinced I have OCD anymore, I think I'm starting to believe something bad will happen to me and this is all signs from the universe. Every explanation I have my brain shoots it down and I don't even know if I do compulsions anymore because I have constant anxiety. Has anyone experienced similar? Is this actually psychosis rather than OCD? I can't accept the idea that these are signs but at the same time I can't ignore them there's too many. Any advice would be good.
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