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Annie x

OCD-UK Member
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About Annie x

Previous Fields

  • OCD Status
    Living with OCD

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    Scotland

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  1. I think alcohol absolutely makes anxiety worse. I call it hangxiety. Those heightened feelings of doom and panic the day after drinking. OCD won't go away when you stop drinking, but you'll have much less anxiety on your plate, which really helps. I stopped drinking in 2021. Hope this helps x
  2. Hi @canigetawitness1990 and @Angst. This is one of the most debilitating themes of ocd I have. I totally get what you're both talking about. And I also live above others so have had this exact fear. I also take photos of the bath and kitchen sink although some days that urge is much lower and I can manage without doing so. Taking the photos is just another form of reassurance but sometimes it works. It does seem to be true that the more you check the more uncertain you become. A few things I have concluded are: I am not a careless person so if anything I'm less likely to leave a tap running than those you don't check repeatedly, I am doing the best I can, there is no evidence that those with ocd ever carry out the thing they are distressed by, and OCD confuses stakes and odds. By this I mean, my OCD wonders if I've left the tap on and bombards me with thoughts of how catastrophic that would be. The stakes are high. But the odds are actually pretty low. But OCD tells you high stakes are the same as high odds - if something bad can happen, then it will happen - but that's not true. Carrying these conclusions in my mind has helped me and I hope it helps you both too xx
  3. Hi @Gingham I think it will have helped you to get your feelings out here. Well done for sharing. I hope you have people in your life you can lean on too. I imagine halving the dose of any medication would have an effect (although I'm not a medic) so be kind to yourself as your system adjusts. Is there anything you can do to apply some self care today? Watch a favourite film? Read a good book? Sit out in the sun? You deserve to feel better x
  4. Hi all. I just returned from a holiday, which I had been anticipating would be a battle with my ocd, and I found it effective and helpful to remember something some lovely soul here said about there not being a requirement to do compulsions/ there isn't anything to 'get right' in the first place. Having trawled through the discussions here, I can't find who said it to thank them personally, but if you know it was you, thankyou so much, it helped loads in confronting my 'what ifs' and intrusive thoughts about things not being 'just right' x
  5. Hi @Gingham I hope you're doing okay today. I just noticed you've started a few discussions recently. Try and do something nice for you while you're having a tough time with ocd x
  6. Hi @Summer9173 I'm sorry to hear it didn't go your way. Did they give a reason? I'm not sure what to offer you in terms of advice but just wanted to say I hope things work out, and keep reaching out. Take care
  7. Unfortunately, a lot of it is work related. But I love what I do so just have to as you say find little strategies for dealing with it. I also ruminate less about work most of the time now (occasionally I get a big flare up of rumination usually over a decision I wasn't expecting or a last minute change or something I feel is unfair) I think I am getting better at curbing stress, but it takes consistent effort. Thanks for your reply.
  8. @Handy may I ask out of curiosity what ocd meds did for you? Do they stop the intrusive obsessions? And when you come off them is there a longterm difference? Thanks
  9. Thanks @taurean I hope to achieve what you are saying about taking a leap of faith more consistently. Sometimes I feel brave enough to and sometimes I don't. At this point I eat healthily, I don't drink, I sleep 8 hours a night and I do yoga. Yet I still have ocd symptoms. So frustrating! I think my biggest trigger is stress But I would acknowledge ocd was even worse at times before doing all these things.
  10. @Lisa123 this happens to me too. It's like I resist one compulsion which increases my anxiety, then another obsession comes along straight after and in my already heightened state of anxiety, it feels worse and harder to ignore. Also have had an easy day where obsessions are easier to not engage with followed by a nightmare of a day where my brain gets stuck on a thought and compulsions take ages. @Zelda what you're saying here is so helpful about the bully at the gate analogy. Thankyou for sharing, that makes a lot of sense. Hugs to you both x
  11. @Seb @northpaul I hear what you're both saying. Seb I would say I'm high functioning too - good job that I have never taken a day off from due to ocd - I feel fortunate as I know others aren't so lucky. But I've spent most of my life mentally exhausted and a big part of that has been trying to keep up the facade that everything's fine and hiding ocd. Like you I've often wondered what it would be like to just get up one morning and ignore all obsessions and resist all compulsions. It sounds liberating. But seems so hard to do. North Paul I agree with you, I much prefer the term condition management. I think it's more realistic for me anyway. And allows for a bit of self compassion and acceptance instead of beating myself up for not conquering my obsessions all these years - I can learn to live as best I can with them. And I say this having had cbt and learning lots from it, but still battling daily to put the strategies in place. Good days and bad, which is the 50-50 of life. Thankyou both x
  12. So great to read all the positivity here. I've just finished up work for the holidays and find it hard to adjust from 100mph to 0mph. I think it's an executive function issue - I can't see the wood for the trees and not sure what to do first - tidy, shop, relax etc. And some days I just don't go out because it feels too much effort when I don't actually need to. So today I used a technique that helps which is to do one thing, then the next, and so on ie have a shower, have a cup of tea, do hair, check phone, put makeup on and get dressed, have breakfast. Then at that point having done 'chores' separated by down time like having tea without thinking about the whole process at once allows me to feel like going out is then easier. I then headed to the shops to buy food I have ocd around sending parcels back via the post office. But today I carried out the packaging, labelling, sealing and returning as calmly as I could even though the intrusive thoughts raged, and still raged afterwards - and the anxiety didn't last as long as I anticipated. So I think going out when my brain was on overwhelm and posting the parcel back counts as two little wins today. Time for feet up now x
  13. This is such a good analogy @Garfield Totally agree. It's like ocd has to be heard so if you ignore it, it'll just manifest in another way. Exhausting. Glad to not be alone in the fight, but sorry you are going through it as I know how hard it is x
  14. This is a similar thought to one I had recently @Gingham At this time of year when I finish up work there's always a big annual decision being made by management. In other places, it's decided by now, but for us it isn't and I have to go on holiday not knowing what they'll decide - and it will have a big effect on the coming year so it's important - and every year I struggle with and ruminate over the uncertainty of this. Or rather, ocd does. It occurred to me to think about the opposite situation 'well, what if I was heading off on my holidays and I knew the outcome of the decision? What if I had a piece of paper in my hand before I left that confirmed it? Wouldn't ocd just find something else to latch onto instead?' This is the first time I've thought like this! Maybe it's not about having certainty, but about getting comfortable with uncertainty. And this sounds similar I think to what you've said above - ocd always finds something. Thanks Gingham for your advice x
  15. Hi @PolarBear that's wonderful, but may I ask what 'symptom free' is? By that I mean, don't you still get intrusive thoughts? Do you mean you no longer carry out compulsions? Thanks x
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