Bad Night With OCD And Depression

[Guest Dippy]

Something happened this morning that pushed me right over the edge. My sister's partner shut the cat in the house this morning when he left for work and my cat crapped on the floor. As I was the only one home it was down to me to clean it up, it was not nice at all. It really pushed my OCD to the limit and I cracked. I rang my mum and broke down in tears. I really really can't cope. I got about 5 hours sleep last night, I was an hour late for work because of all this and I just can't take anymore

Edited May 23, 2006 by Guest

[Rachie]

Dippy, go home and get some rest, or at least take a few hours away from work. Don't keep on working until the pressure's too much.

Rach xx

[Guest Dippy]

I want to be at home as little as possable right now. I can't cope being there. I'd be ok at work if I could get some sleep, I could cope with the stress of my job better.

I keep feeling faint, my chest is all tight and I can't think.

[Rachie]

Are you eating, Dippy? Even if you don't feel like it you should eat something, or drink some juice or smoothies. Take some deep breaths to try to relax you.

I can understand you not wanting to be home but just be careful you don't put yourself under too much pressure at work.

[Guest Dippy]

I am hungry, my appetite is fine although I didn't eat much last night. I'm drinking loads of water which I do anyway.

I went for a quick sprint this morning to try and run off some stress.

[Rachie]

That's good to hear. Is your chest feeling any better?

[Guest Dippy]

A bit. Don't want to be at work but I don't want to go home either. I would go out somewhere tonight but I don't trust myself to not fall asleep while driving.

Edited May 23, 2006 by Guest

[Guest Dippy]

I'm really really struggling. I've got two hours left to go but i'm not sure I can cope being here for much longer. I can't go off sick, I think i've messed my employer around enough after being late this morning!

I don't know how much longer I can carry on like this?

[Guest hayley73]

Dippy I would like to think that your employer would be more understanding under the cirumstances. Even attempting to go to work with everything you are going through right now I think is amazing.

Don't try to please others but do what you need to do at this time. Don't try to keep yourself busy to the point where you are absolutely physically and mentally exhausted. If need be go to your doctor and get yourself on the sick. Try to recharge your batteries a bit as you are gonna need some strength in reserve for the coming weeks and months.

[Guest Dippy]

I really don't want to take any time off sick. I have been trying to sort some leave out but it's not going to be for a while. I'll have time off next week (obvious reasons) but not enough for me to get away. I needed a break before all this happened, I am already phsically and mentally exchausted.

I'm gonna sound selfish for saying this but I wish I had someone to take some of the strain off me.

[Guest hayley73]

Why is that selfish? Wishing you had someone to take the strain is not selfish at all. START THINKING OF YOURSELF!!!!!!

[Guest Dippy]

I get accused of being selfish by my family when I try and do something that makes me happy so I naturally think wanting someone's help is being selfish on my part.

[Guest Logic]

Dippy,

So sorry to hear of your loss.

I will prayer for you, to give you strength.

My family are the same, you should get help, I know my family are in the wrong when they say that to me.

[Guest hayley73]

Its not being selfish needing a break. Also if you are working full time you are entitled to Berevement Leave as it is your immediate family (your sister). They cannot stop you taking it. Its the law.

Dippy you need to look after yourself cause the rest of the family is tied up with other things. If you don't take care of yourself who will?

[Guest Dippy]

Its not being selfish needing a break. Also if you are working full time you are entitled to Berevement Leave as it is your immediate family (your sister). They cannot stop you taking it. Its the law.

Dippy you need to look after yourself cause the rest of the family is tied up with other things. If you don't take care of yourself who will?

Exactly! I don't have anyone to look out for me/be there for me. I will probably regret saying this but I actually really miss my ex-girlfriend right now.

[Guest hayley73]

When bad things happen in our lives I think we all tend to miss ex partners if we are not with anyone else. Try to speak to a friend. If you find you don't have anyone you feel you can turn too, what about the Samaritians? I have phoned them numerous times when I felt I needed to off load. Sometimes just sharing things can bring a bit of relief.

Please feel free to PM me anytime. The only problem is I can't always get to the PC as there are 2 boys and an Husband fighting me for it!!!!!!!! :lol:

[Guest Dippy]

Thanks for the offer :original:

I find it difficult to get on the PC when i'm home in the evenings and weekends as my sister's partner sleeps in the room the PC is in and he spends most of his time in there!

[Guest liquorice]

Hi Dippy,

I have just happened onto this thread now and I feel really sorry for the horrible shock that you've just had.

I agree with other people that you need to go into survival mode and think of yourself only.Forget your employer, take the leave Rachie said you're entitled to, or part leave, or whatever time out whenever you feel like it...Could you afford to pay for a cheap B&B for a couple of nights or sleep in someone's spare room so you can get some rest? Trust your instinct on where and what is better for you now.

Aromatherapy does work, even smelling some lavender flowers might help,you can get them from some health food shops or maybe some neighbour's garden grow it. Rosemary twigs, mint leaves you can chew are good pick me up.

Looking into a candle flame can sort of calm you down enough before going to bed, just make sure you blow it out before you lie down.

Also for the future it might be helpful to keep a list of numbers handy such as the Samaritans or Cruise or a counsellor's office, if you don't have anyone close strong enough to support you for the weeks to come.

Have courage and hold on :hug:

[Guest Dippy]

As soon as I can get some time off I am going to go away somewhere, now probably isn't the right time to be going away although I feel I really need to.

I don't think I could call the Samaritans. Not sure i'm comfortable with that? All I really want/need is someone to talk to face to face, someone to hold me.

[Guest Dippy]

Feel a little better. Just made myself some nice spaghetti bolognese :a1_cheesygrin: . Got to drive down to my sister's place now,.

[Guest h_777]

mmmm spag bol! I'm having fajitas tonight :original:

how are you today?

xxx

[Guest Dippy]

Dunno what i'm having tonight? Not alot of food in the house at the moment.

I'm a bit up and down today. Still not sleeping well. Fell asleep while I was meant to be looking after the kids this morning.

[Guest hayley73]

Hi Dippy

Nice to see you on the forum. Been wondering how things are going for you today? Don't worry about falling asleep, it probably did you good.

I think the key is regarding food right now is just eat what you fancy. How are the kids doing? It must be really tough for them right now. Having said that you sound like a great Aunty or cares about them deeply.

[Guest Dippy]

The kids are fine, doing better then me.

I love the kids like their my own, well they are going to be the closest thing i've got to having my own kids. I've been involved with both their up bringing since the day they were born. I even used to change their nappies!!

Just found out all the arrangements for next week have been made. All seems so.......I dunno?

[Rachie]

Must be really tough for you. Hope you can get some sleep tonight. x