new worry about maybe I want to be a women!!!!!

[Guest lol]

In the last few weeks my original bad thoughts about commiting violence and wishing bad things on people have subsided. However Now I have a real worry that I want to be a women and that I might want to have an operation to make me a women. This new worry scars me and brings me out in a sweat and causes me alot of anxiety

what if??? what if?? etc .I need some help or advice as I'm sure some of you have been thbrough this HELP Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lol :helpsmilie:

[Guest 574lk3r]

i cant offer any wisdom,

but just so you dont feel alone,

ive forgotton that i felt a little like that once,

i think the curiosty of what it would be like may be common to an extent,

just that with ocd it gets blown out of all proportion,

i suppose one thing is to try and remember that its ok to be curious,

i wont go into details for fear of spiking you,

but ive wondered what all sorts of things would be like as a woman.

and wether i should really of been one.

the only thing that kept my head above water is that there was one thing id miss.

maybe im making it too simplistic...

[Guest Brainiac]

Hi LOL

This is just another what if that has been grabbed by naughty OCD, the fact that you are sweating and worrying shows that it is a fear, loads of people have probably thought about being the opposite sex, and thats as far as it goes, you are just worrying because the OCD is using it as another thing to twist and upset you.

Edited January 29, 2007 by Guest

[Caramoole]

This new worry scars me and brings me out in a sweat and causes me alot of anxiety

what if??? what if??

It's that level of anxiety that identifies it as an OCD thought.

As OCD sufferers we often worry about 'What if I......wanted to be a woman.....fancied children.....enjoyed violence......became gay.....hurt my pet.....etc etc etc

It's because it is a thought that is the extreme opposite of what we really want, that's why it scares us so much.

Try not to rationalise it or convince yourselves of all the reasons why this isn't what you want, it's the rumination that keeps the OCD fear firmly alive.

Know it for what it is, remind yourself it's OCD and try NOT to force the thoughts away.

Good Luck

Caramoole

[Guest Francis]

Never had this particular worry myself - but have definitely had the thought many times. I think there's a great Woody Allen line about how he'd never go out if he was a woman - just stay indoors enjoying how he felt (apologies if anyone considers this a sexist comment)!

The other posters are right - the thought is perfectly normal - the anxiety it causes is the issue. Try not to 'stop' the thought - let it be there as often as it likes and in any form it takes. Over time, you'll feel less anxious (humans can get used to anything given time) - then (hard to believe now maybe) the frequency of the original thought will subside.

remember - the thoughts only gain the power to make you anxious when you fear them and try to stop them

Good luck

[Guest ppyvabw]

I know what this is like. It followed on from my gay thoughts. The gay thoughts are back now, but I certainly dont want that thought back. I had it for 2 and a half years.

It got so bad for me that I tried cross dressing. I tried on my housemates bra and knickers :blushing: :blushing: :lol: Naturally they didn't fit and I put balls of socks in the bra. She never found out thankfully! I would look at myself in the mirror naked and try and imagine what it would be like. Also I tried painting my finger nails with tip ex.

I've never heard of any one else with this obsession so I'm glad you posted because its a big help to me aswell.

Nothing I can say will reassure you but ask yourself this. Do you look at women and really envy them and want to have hair like them, or envy her figure? Probably you don't so it is just an obsession. But be aware now that you will probably turn that reassurance in on its self and obsess that you really do envy women, like I did.

It's easy for me to say because im struggling to do it with my thoughts.but what Francis says is right. The way to deal with it is to just let the thoughts be there, even fantasize about it and expose yourself to it etc..... It's very scary and iI see it as kind of a leap of faith.

Another thing, incase you are doing what I did, DON'T look it up on the internet. You will not find answers and it will make you much much worse, i promise.

Good luck, you will be fine trust me. Feel free to PM me if you want.

Edited January 29, 2007 by Guest

[Guest hayley73]

I am sorry lol that your OCD is making you suffer this way. But, believe me you would not want to be a women. I have raging PMT at this moment - my hubby and kids are ducking for cover :laugh:

I'm not taking the mick honestly. It must be awful worrying like this. But the fact that it is causing so much distress to you, shows its OCD. Take care. I think the others have given excellent advice. :original: