Guest legend Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 you dont get caught out as such, but sometimes, i engage, and get into a little debate, and then i have to give myself a reminder.....legend, your slipping, remember the rules...oh yeah, ocd, you twit. i suppose, if i had checking behaviours, and overcome them, the ocd could creep back, and then you might get tempted, to go and check, just to make sure, thats the point ive seemed to have mastered...dont... otherwise, it will all start over again. little things come and go cat, not the peado type at all, sometimes relationship traits creep in, but power, remember why...come on leggy... pheeeew x legend Link to comment
Caramoole Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 Okay.....if you really feel like it's an urge, you have to try and resist giving in to the urge, despite how strongly you feel compelled. Link to comment
Guest cat1 Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 so,if ocd paedophile fears come up for u again,u just relabel it ocd and move on? you dont get caught out as such, but sometimes, i engage, and get into a little debate, and then i have to give myself a reminder.....legend, your slipping, remember the rules...oh yeah, ocd, you twit. i suppose, if i had checking behaviours, and overcome them, the ocd could creep back, and then you might get tempted, to go and check, just to make sure, thats the point ive seemed to have mastered...dont... otherwise, it will all start over again. little things come and go cat, not the peado type at all, sometimes relationship traits creep in, but power, remember why...come on leggy... pheeeew x legend Link to comment
Guest legend Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 no, because, i know that im not a peadophile, and im now in a solid position, that these type of thoughts may come in and go, like a non ocd sufferer. my problems cat, mainly, was that my ocd built up into a mountain, gradually overtime, taking various flavours along the way,...once the lable was given, i was able to understand why i think in this way, and how to deal with it all. Link to comment
Guest cat1 Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 (edited) i meant,if u get obsessive peadophile or other obsessional thoughts come in,you just relabel them and move on? i wasnt saying u had real fears of being a paedophile or were one! the thing is though,i know im gay,and yet i still get the thoughts sometimes.so why dont i no longer get them like u? i know at the moment ive not handled them well.But before,i no longer ruminated on them but let them go,yet they STILL came back! (i mean the thoughts and the reactions to them).i cant understand why if treatment involves changing ur brain chemistry,and reacting to the thoughts differently,that you still get triggers from time to time.I mean 'you' generally not you specifically.Before my relapse several months ago,i felt completely solid knowing i was gay,so why did it come back? My ocd started differently to yours i think,as mine started off with lots of intrusive thoughts and anxiety straight away.It didnt build up like u say urs did.Ive noticed that others here have said theres started like urs,which makes me worry why mine was different... i hope this doesnt sound like a weird question,but what gave u that KNOWING that youre not a paedophile? (please dont take that the wrong way!).Most of the time i dont doubt now that im gay,but i dont know if one day i will always have the knowing all the time,like i did before i got the ocd. no, because, i know that im not a peadophile, and im now in a solid position, that these type of thoughts may come in and go, like a non ocd sufferer. my problems cat, mainly, was that my ocd built up into a mountain, gradually overtime, taking various flavours along the way,...once the lable was given, i was able to understand why i think in this way, and how to deal with it all. Edited June 7, 2009 by Guest Link to comment
Guest legend Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 ocd is ocd........but, it can start differently, in people,..........depressive episodes, ptsd, death, birth-pnd, theres lots of ways it starts, all of a sudden, gradulally. Link to comment
Guest cat1 Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 but will cbt get me to where i no longer ever doubt or question myself over my sexuality again? Link to comment
Guest legend Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 but will cbt get me to where i no longer ever doubt or question myself over my sexuality again? i think we all would like to think so cat xxx Link to comment
Guest cat1 Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 (edited) so are u saying that u still occassionally get doubts yourself,even though u get rid of them quickly? I know that about six months ago,that sense of certainty came back for me,and now most of the time,i feel it deep down,even after my worst spikes,although sometimes it takes me longer to access it....! Edited June 7, 2009 by Guest Link to comment
Caramoole Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 but will cbt get me to where i no longer ever doubt or question myself over my sexuality again? You see I differ from Legend in this respect because I think that although it's possible.....my experience and that of most sufferers is that it tends to be a relaxing and remitting condition and does return. I hope you are fortunate to arrive at a place where you never doubt.....I tend to believe that people learn to handle their condition. Just my opinion. Caramoole Link to comment
Guest cat1 Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 (edited) hi.i have once overcome all my symptoms,so i know that this is possible.i also believe that ocd can be overcome.Thats what im working towards.I cant guarantee that ill never get the intrusive thoughts pop up again,but if they no longer bother me,ill consider myself over it.I guess as i didnt have ocd at one time,i see no reason why i cant go back to not having it again.After all,what would be the point of changing ur brain chemistry if it was to return? i would see that as pointless.I dont think id bother trying to get over this if i didnt believe i could.i do agree drifter that ocd symptoms are on a continum,and dont expect to get rid of all my obsessive tendencies,but i aim to keep the constructive ones not the destructive ones! After all,i think we all have a bit of ocd in us somewhere! Edited June 7, 2009 by Guest Link to comment
Guest legend Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 You see I differ from Legend in this respect because I think that although it's possible.....my experience and that of most sufferers is that it tends to be a relaxing and remitting condition and does return. I hope you are fortunate to arrive at a place where you never doubt.....I tend to believe that people learn to handle their condition. Just my opinion. Caramoole totally agree caramoole, i think i sort of explained it, earlier to cat, anticipation, and knowledge . Link to comment
Caramoole Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 hi.i have once overcome all my symptoms,so i know that this is possible And your symptoms have returned, which is the point I'm making. I hope you're fortunate enough that you do conquer it completely. After all,what would be the point of changing ur brain chemistry if it was to return? i would see that as pointless Why would it be pointless? I find that an odd comment. We work to change the brain chemistry to overcome an episode and deal with it more effetively each time. Would you tell someone suffering from severe depression it wasn't worth trying anti-depressants to change their brain chemistry if it wasn't permanent and got another bout of depression :dry: Caramoole Link to comment
Caramoole Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 totally agree caramoole, i think i sort of explained it, earlier to cat, anticipation, and knowledge Yes, sorry Legend, I was referring to your last comment...I hadn't read up at that point, I see your explanations earlier Link to comment
Guest cat1 Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 (edited) i just meant that surely if ur changing the brain chemistry,why isnt it permanent? when i first read brainlock i was under the impression that it implied a permanent change,but now realise it wasnt saying that that was possible.Im not saying its a waste of time doing cbt etc,its not,but for me,i dont accept that i cannot live symptom free from ocd once again.I guess a partial recovery isnt enough for me.. And your symptoms have returned, which is the point I'm making. I hope you're fortunate enough that you do conquer it completely. Why would it be pointless? I find that an odd comment. We work to change the brain chemistry to overcome an episode and deal with it more effetively each time. Would you tell someone suffering from severe depression it wasn't worth trying anti-depressants to change their brain chemistry if it wasn't permanent and got another bout of depression :dry: Caramoole Edited June 7, 2009 by Guest Link to comment
Caramoole Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 i just meant that surely if ur changing the brain chemistry,why isnt it permanent? Because it isn't fixed and permanent. Just as your brain changed and you developed OCD or someone has depression, it can change. Link to comment
Guest cat1 Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 (edited) im not sure i get what u mean.your saying is isnt permanent because its not? yes,i realise it can change back,but then what makes it change to give u ocd syptoms again? i dont know a lot about how the brain works.im just trying to understand things here...take it easy on me,ok? :confused1: Edited June 7, 2009 by Guest Link to comment
Guest legend Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 Yes, sorry Legend, I was referring to your last comment...I hadn't read up at that point, I see your explanations earlier and in my confuscious state, lol, i was wrong to imply, in my opinion that, you can be ocd free, but you can lead a good life...with it in the background. sorry, doh.... Link to comment
Guest cat1 Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 i think we will have to agree to disagree on that one legend.i do believe u can live symptom free,as do several therapists ive spoken to.Only time will tell.... Link to comment
Guest legend Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 i think we will have to agree to disagree on that one legend.i do believe u can live symptom free,as do several therapists ive spoken to.Only time will tell.... yep, but dont make it the ultimate goal.......marathon not a sprint, and of course, as i said earlier, ocd can enter, at any time, and go at anytime, depending, i suppose on the underlying cause........... Link to comment
Guest cat1 Posted June 8, 2009 Share Posted June 8, 2009 (edited) Had a nasty spike today in the supermarket.Saw this guy (not the slightest bit attractive!),actually i saw his jacket and got this huge surge of anxiety then i found myself letting out a laugh,which brought with it slightly good feelings,no groinal response though.But i did get myself over it by relabelling etc.But i was very anxious about whether it was all arousal.Im finding that ive got some very weird things going on now.Its almost like a tic,where u find yourself doing something automatically without consciously choosing too.Now when i get anxious i often hold my breath then let it out with a laugh (i dont mean a funny haha kind of laugh),just like a one second laugh.But the good feeling brought with the laugh then causes me to get even more anxious as the ocd says 'ah but u felt good because...',usual thing.I dont know if its a compulsion as i do it without thinking about it.Ive also developed this habit of automatically tensing up my genital area,then when i focus down there i get this tingling,its worse if i tense more,but its still only a very slight feeling. legend can u help me on this? as i read elsewhere on here that u have tourettes..what did u mean about the 'underlying cause...' of ocd? i dont like it when people put ....,it makes me feel anxious! my goal with my ocd is to get rid of the thoughts,if not permanently then for most of the time.When i got over it before the thoughts went completely.I dont know if thats possible for me,but im hoping! im not sure if i will ever be able to let the thoughts go without being even slightly perturbed by them,even if they no longer upset me.Ie i dont know if i will be able to let them go like i would another kind of intrusive thought 'ie the thought of driving my car off the road'.Is that what youve reached legend? a stage where they dont bother you AT ALL? I also made myself get the 'nice' feelings by thinking about something sticking out my trolley,i said 'its like an erection',and just felt anxiety,then i said to myself as if i was making myself feel good about it i said 'its MY erection',then felt this anxiety and mixed good feelings.It scared me,although i didnt mean or think anything to do with men. Edited June 8, 2009 by Guest Link to comment
Guest legend Posted June 8, 2009 Share Posted June 8, 2009 underlying, i mean there could be other problems running alongside the ocd, and a therapists job, would be to look at each problem individually, and to work on which one is making the other worse, or vice-versa. yes, im able to recognise intrusive thoughts, and to not engage with them anymore. Link to comment
Guest autumn girl Posted June 8, 2009 Share Posted June 8, 2009 i think we will have to agree to disagree on that one legend.i do believe u can live symptom free,as do several therapists ive spoken to.Only time will tell.... I know how adamently you believe this Cat, and I promise I will only say this one more time! but I truly believe this is causing you trouble. I believe that the thoughts will always be around because we suffer from OCD, just the same as people with diabetes always have to deal with that. I think it's damaging to have as your measure of success NEVER having the thoughts again because you are setting yourself up to fail. And I believe you would be helping yourself much much more by working on how to manage the thoughts when they do arise rather than pushing and pushing yourself to never have them. BUT I know that you don't agree, I just wish you would perhaps consider this though. Autumn xxx Link to comment
Guest cat1 Posted June 8, 2009 Share Posted June 8, 2009 (edited) i suppose i could try to accept (although i dont know if i can right now) that i might get the intrusive thoughts occassionally,once ive recovered from my ocd.But thats only like intrusive thoughts that everyone gets,right? what i want also,is that i want to get rid of my 'obsessional' intrusive thoughts,ie the ones that come in as a reult of me engaging with my intrusive thoughts about men.do u see what i mean? i mean,to me,thoughts such as 'hes attractive' are intrusive thoughts,but thoughts such as 'you fancy him' etc developed as a result of the excess attention i put on the 'hes attractive' ones.Ive read before that what ocd does is replicate thoughts because we pay too much attention to them and feel they must mean something.At the moment all i want to do is get to a point where im not in anxiety daily and getting fewer thoughts,then after that,who knows how much better i will get.I dont know at this moment,but part of what is helping me slightly out of my depression right now is the opptomistic view that i will get over this,so thats why im holding onto that view.Otherwise id be giving up all hope of anything,as i did a few days ago...do u see why i hold that view now? i also believe that when we all recover from our ocd,we may get intrusive thoughts like everyone without ocd,but they wont bother us,just as they dont bother non ocd people,so we can get to a stage where we dont have clinincally diagnosable ocd,but just intrusive thoughts.That to me i can accept means that you dont have ocd anymore. Edited June 8, 2009 by Guest Link to comment
Ashley Posted June 8, 2009 Share Posted June 8, 2009 i suppose i could try to accept (although i dont know if i can right now) that i might get the intrusive thoughts occassionally,once ive recovered from my ocd. Everybody gets intrusive thoughts Cat, be they gay, straight, OCD, non OCD. Treating OCD is all about looking at how we respond to those intrusive thoughts. Again I need to ask if you checked out that book I recommeneded a while back, OCD - The Facts? Link to comment
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