Nervous

[Guest summerleft]

Morning all!

well it looks likely that my partner will get the job down south, It will mean 6 mnths training on his part 3 of which being in london where they will put him up in a hotel.

Great yes i know but i will stay up north while he stops in london during the week for the first month but then our lease runs out which will mean im gonig to have 2 months of basically living on my own in the south where i know no one very scared about this prospect especially with my ocd . i know itll only be 2 months and hell be home at w/e but 5 days is a long time when no body is there.

Any one had a similar experience how did you cope?

[Guest Brainstrain]

Morning all!

well it looks likely that my partner will get the job down south, It will mean 6 mnths training on his part 3 of which being in london where they will put him up in a hotel.

Great yes i know but i will stay up north while he stops in london during the week for the first month but then our lease runs out which will mean im gonig to have 2 months of basically living on my own  in the south where i know no one very scared about this prospect especially with my ocd . i know itll only be 2 months and hell be home at w/e but 5 days is a long time when no body is there. 

Any one had a similar experience how did you cope?

29673[/snapback]

Hi Summerleft

Just to say I haven't had a similar experience but I know I would feel terrible if I was in your situation and can totally understand what you are going through. Occasionally my husband used to go and stay at his brother's just for a night and I used to be a mess for about three days before and the day after so he doesn't do that anymore! I know that's not very helpful sorry! Hope it works out for you ok.

Brainstrain

[Guest summerleft]

thanks

I keep saying to my partner how id feel but im not sure he believes its the ocd, he says he understands how id feel if i was alone but, says he has to do the job which i understand and then if i mention it gets in a stroppy im not asking him to stay here im asking him to help find a solution .

I know he has alot to think about new job and that but i dont see why he has to be in a hotel after the first month if we get a house he could commute

I dunno its just making me very sad he wants me to cheer up but its hard because this will happen and i just keep thinking maybe i should stay on my own here *shrugs*

[Guest Brainstrain]

I know he has alot to think about new job and that but i dont see why he has to be in a hotel after the first month if we get a house he could commute

This seems to make much more sense and surely it would be better for him to have a settled base to come home too rather than living out of a suitcase in a hotel room, plus he will probably benefit from your support and having you around in his first few months in stressful new job. If you are on your own everytime you speak to him you will probably sound negative and sad becuase you're on your own and that will just end up making him feel bad so he will not be able to concentrate on his job so well anyway! I definately think commuting is the way to go, have you put this idea to him? Or maybe you could stay in the hotel with him?

brainstrain

[Guest summerleft]

problem is we have a dog and a new kitten our other pets could stay with my parents but 3 mnths is too long for a huge dog lol

ive said to him about commuting so hes going to ask the company i dontr see why theyed say no, i think if we were married it would be a different matter partners dont get the same reaction anyhow will see how it goes i havnt even visited anywhere where we might live so im really going into a black abyss ! he said we can go have a look before then though

ohhh tis all big and scary!

[Guest Brainstrain]

problem is we have a dog and a new kitten our other pets could stay with my parents but 3 mnths is too long for a huge dog lol

ive said to him about commuting so hes going to ask the company i dontr see why theyed say no, i think if we were married it would be a different matter partners dont get the same reaction anyhow will see how it goes i havnt even visited anywhere where we might live so im really going into a black abyss ! he said we can go have a look before then though

ohhh tis all big and scary!

29704[/snapback]

Yeah people do seem to take you more seriously when you're married for some reason, it's a bit out of order really! The company will probably be pleased cos they won't be having to pay to keep him in the hotel. Try not to worry though, I know it's hard but try to see it as an adventure rather than something scary.

Good luck I hope it all works out for you!

brainstrain