question for intrusive thoughts sufferers

[Guest robert1]

as many of ye know i suffer with thoughts of doing things to my daughter ,(if ye don't know my systoms please take a look back in eariler posts as it is too distressing to say it again),well this morning i looked at me daughter and said to myself you want to do them things ,which before would have freacked me out but this time they did not and this has me wondering if i am this evil person that i think i am ,please has anyone suffered this as i am doubting in my head if i don't want to do these things,i think the only reason i haven't done anything is the thoughts of getting caught not the actually act ,every time i am near my daughter i am getting nervous checking ,please help me on this .

[Guest robert1]

the thing about been caught that is what my head is saying to me ,that you are only upset at the prospect of been caught and not the act ,which is really causing me panic ,just said i would say that is ye got the wrong idea from the post .

[Guest Dennis912]

Hey Rob,

I wish I had the magic words to make you feel better..but maybe telling you my

story might help.....

Well I guess i'm in the same boat you are - I have thoughts about hurting my pregnant wife, raping women ect..

anyway this has been going on for awhile now 6-7 months and I used to go crazy

in my head trying not to think about this **** - but I just paniced like you and I would end up taking xanax everynight before bed..

What everyone says to me is: let the thoughts come into your head, give them no value and than let them float out --> (some familiar)..

well I have been doing that lately and I don't get crazy like I used to, and than I think am I a bad person..Well I am now seeing that these thoughts are stuiped and I know nothing will come of them, to be honest when these thoughts are in my head and making me anxious I believe I have ocd like my stuiped therapist says, but when they are there and I can let go of them, I feel almost normal

MAN - NORMAL PEOPLE HAVE THESE THOUGHTS, they just get rid of them as soon as they come in, We just hold on to them for some reason.............

We are all good people thats why this **** bothers us soooo much

Dennis..

[Guest Beckett93]

Excellent post Dennis!! You are so right. Just let them come and go. They are repugnant, but they mean nothing.

Robert, it's hard to do so, but try not to analyze them so much. Not freaking out over your obsessive thoughts does not mean you are evil or that you really want to do them, because you don't. The fact that you are here at this board shows you don't and it is only OCD that is making you doubt rather you do or don't. You just have to let it all flow past you, realize that the whole thing is just OCD and that it in no way reflects on you as a person. Your obsessions are not some Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde thing. They aren't some deeply submerged evil part of you, because you are not evil, you are a good person. They are just common symptoms of a medical problem. OCD is stubborn and the fact that you are able to not freak out over your original obsession and your OCD is now making you freak out over not freaking out shows me that you are improving. The OCD is looking for anything it can get to make you suffer and you can't let it have anything. Tell yourself, "so what if I didn't freak out? There's nothing to freak out about. It's all just OCD and I am not going to let this control my life." I don't know if you are in treatment or not, but if you aren't, please consider it. It can go a long way in helping you feel better. The best weapon against OCD is understanding how it works and a professional is the best place to learn.

[Guest han]

Hi,

i was in exactly the same position as you a few months back. my opinion on the matter is that maybe this is a sign that you are beginning to recover, because the intial thoughts are not causing you the anxiety that you used to have - this is apparantly what "normal" people do, as said by Dennis; they have the thoughts but ignore them because they are not your real feelings. just because you are not getting as anxious does not mean that you actually do want to cause harm.

also, the way i see it is that worrying about not worrying, is the same as actually worrying in the first place....if that makes sense! from my own experience, this is exactly the process in which i began to get better- i started to get less anxious about the harming thoughts i was having so i worried about that (which went on for a while), but soon that worrying reduced too, at which point i began to accept that i knew i wasn't capable of hurting anyone -ocd takes time to defeat, whether its months or years, and it may never fully go away - most people just learn to live with it - i still have my bad days but on the whole things are a lot easier, so hang in there! :blushing:

i really hope that things get easier for you soon,

take care

H x

p.s. sorry if none of this made any sense!

[Guest napo100383]

Yeah it sounds like you are gettin slowly better and your OCD is trying to make u doubt the fact that is bothering you less,this happens me sometimes too if i dismiss a thought im like that means ill really do it when i wont,

Hang in there

[Guest ace of base fan]

yeah it does sound as if you are starting to be more tolerant of the thoughts robert which is a good sign and shows you are getting better,i have had this happen and started to wonder why i felt so calm about having bad sexual thoughts but it was because i was getting better and used to them,good luck rob you are doing well mate.

[Guest Tulsas]

Firstly you won't hurt your daughter my friend..you are an ocd sufferer and not a murderer.secondly I had the same thoughts and feelings as you and I will tell you now they will go.They won't last.I still have horrible thoughts when I look at my nephews and niece.And as upsetting as they are they are not real.You have a thought about harming your child and then you have another thought about being caught...can you see what this ocd is doing...its leading you from one thought to another and soon it will be another and then another...let it play its game, and don't get involved in it...it will get bored and go...I know its hard because I have been through it and still do.But not as severe.you have to seperate yourself from the thought and the compulsion.My friend who counsels people has such a calm demenier and everytime I phone him with one of my thoughts and feelings he tells me'thats fine. Its okay to have these thoughts and feelings'.You see people with ocd think somethings wrong or that they shouldn't think like this and every now and then they need someone to who can see pass this useless time wasting ocd and let us know everything is fine...