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I won't name her just yet because I know she was worried about the reaction, but here is the article that one of our users contributed to.

Be proud of yourself, this is a superb article and description of various forms of OCD. :thumbup: (And if she says its ok to name her, I will change the thread title).

Source: Press and Journal By LINDSAY MCINTOSH

Imagine having constant and unbidden thoughts of harming your children. Imagine believing such thoughts could cause disasters.

Imagine having to check your oven was turned off and your alarm was switched on so many times before you could leave your house that you were late for appointments.

Imagine harbouring an insatiable need to keep your surroundings spotless, free from marks or smudges at all times.

You are now imagining what an obsessive-compulsive disorder sufferer might have to live with every day.

Obsessive compulsive disorder, or OCD, can manifest itself in numerous ways and the above are only examples.

The two main features of the disorder are obsessions and compulsions.

Obsessions typically centre around contamination, inflicting harm, order, arrangement or symmetry and upsetting thoughts.

Compulsions can be either overt, which are physical actions such as washing and hoarding, or covert, which are mental routines such as counting or compulsive visualisation.

Often described as "the secret illness", it was thrust into the limelight recently with the release of Hollywood movie The Aviator, starring Leonardo DiCaprio.

DiCaprio plays billionaire aviation pioneer and movie tycoon Howard Hughes, whose life was blighted by obsessional fears of germs and contamination.

The release of the movie has come as a boost to new charity, OCD-UK, by helping raise awareness of the plight of those it tries to help.

The charity literally proved a lifeline to one young north-east woman, Sara, whom it pulled from a depressing life ruled by obsessions and compulsions.

Sara, 27, has spent most of the last decade living a life ruled by habits she could not explain, could not justify and could not break.

In the hope that her story will help others stuck in the same cycle, she decided to speak to the Press and Journal.

Sara, who wanted to remain anonymous, said: "I was about 19 when it really kicked in, although I have spoken to people who knew me when I was younger and they said I was definitely displaying traits then.

"One friend said when I stayed the night I refused to go to bed until I had counted all the words on her poster.

"But it was only when I was 19 that I would say I had it.

"It hit overnight - I don't remember a gradual increase. I guess the main problem I had at the beginning was checking.

"Not just that the front door was locked or the gas was off - although I did that - but under the bed, under cushions - anything I could look into or under.

"I had to do that to make sure but I don't know what of, it was just a feeling I had to do it."

At the time, she was living with her now fiance, whom she met when she was 18.

She believes her compulsions were a reaction to no longer being in control. She had met someone she cared about who, at any time, could leave her or be taken away. And she could not deal with this.

She said: "The fact he could walk away or have an accident terrified me. He would be out of my life and I would be devastated and I couldn't control it. I felt if I didn't check, something bad would happen to him or myself.

"It was more usually him, which meant it was so much harder to ignore, because it was a question of is it worth the risk not doing it and accepting the consequences.

"It wasn't worth it.

"I knew, logically, that not checking would have no consequence of whether or not he got hit by a bus, but I still had to do it for peace of mind.

"I would have momentary comfort, which is one of the reasons why it's so difficult to break the cycle.

"You gain false comfort and trying to stop it puts you through quite a lot of pain and angst and can seem hard to do."

From the checking, Sara's disorder developed into numerous rituals.

Most of them were mental - she had to recite phrases or words in her head before performing practically any daily task, such as walking into a room.

She cannot explain why those words or phrases were chosen or why they were connected to certain actions - all she can say is she could not resist them.

She said: "I had to play patience every night until I managed to win. It could take six or seven hours.

"I was at university at the time and I would miss huge quantities of lectures and tutorials because I couldn't get out of the house to get to them. It became a real problem, but I didn't say anything.

"At the time, I didn't know what OCD was or that I had it - I thought I was going mad."

Sara's degree was in behavioural science and she began to look up her symptoms in books at the university library.

She learned about her condition but was still unable to seek help as she feared she would be stigmatised and considered mentally ill.

She said: "I got to the stage where I was completely physically and mentally exhausted.

"I wasn't sleeping because I was staying up doing rituals and cleaning. It was taking 16 to 18 hours a day and it was the hardest time of my life.

"I was constantly in tears.

"My fiance knew there was something wrong but I think he was worried about upsetting me by confronting me.

"Because I was only at home about two months a year, my parents didn't notice.

"They knew I had to touch every window in the house before I went to bed but they just thought it was a weird quirk."

The next symptom of OCD to affect her was the fear of contamination and, she said, that was the hardest thing to deal with.

She said: "Everything I see scares me. I think everything is contaminated and I think I'm going to get ill from touching things.

"Until last summer, I couldn't eat out, I've not been in a swimming pool for 10 years and I've not had a bath in my own house for eight years.

"I put toilet tissue on the toilet seat before I'll use it. I won't open windows before putting toilet tissue over them first.

"When we have people to stay, I have to use disinfectant on every handle and lock after anyone's touched them."

The other main problem Sara has come up against in the past few years is intrusive thoughts.

Many sufferers endure extremely violent or sexual unbidden thoughts, but Sara says hers are less so.

She said: "I don't like being around knives because I have thought I was going to stick one in my fiance.

"When I'm around knives I have to make sure I use them in a very particular way."

Last year, she finally decided to tackle the disorder which had taken over her life.

She went to her GP and explained what she had been doing and what she thought the explanation was.

Her GP agreed and she was put on Prozac and the waiting list to see a psychiatrist to diagnose her properly.

The psychiatrist confirmed her condition and referred her to a psychologist with whom she has had one session so far.

She described the decision to seek help as "liberating".

She said: "After eight years, I decided enough was enough. There is only so much you can take before you take things into your own hands and deal with it."

A conference addressing OCD will be held on February 19 at Stirling University. The keynote speaker will be Dr Jeffrey Schwartz, the world-renowned authority on the subject, and medical adviser to Leonardo DiCaprio on The Aviator.

For more information on the conference and the condition, visit www.ocduk.org

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Deserves to be Pinned me thinks..... It takes huge courage to open up to a journalist about your OCD, even when you withhold your name so to do it and do it so well is a huge credit to this person.

Really proud of her.

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Guest Dragonfruit

Thank you everyone :)

Just hope I didn't let anyone down (I know - the reassurance monster rears it's ugly head AGAIN - I'll try to ignore it!)

Oh - and apologies for remaining anonymous - I wasn't going to - even spelled my name out - but at the last minute I got cold feet and asked the journalist if she wouldn't mind changing it :dry:

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Oh - and apologies for remaining anonymous - I wasn't going to - even spelled my name out - but at the last minute I got cold feet and asked the journalist if she wouldn't mind changing it  :dry:

31969[/snapback]

No need to apologise - I still think it was great and will raise the profile of OCD :) .

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Oh - and apologies for remaining anonymous - I wasn't going to - even spelled my name out - but at the last minute I got cold feet and asked the journalist if she wouldn't mind changing it  :dry:

31969[/snapback]

Does not matter what name the article talks about, provided the article is well written and tells a good OCD story and yours did all that! So what if your name is sara or dragonlady lol, its the story that counts and thats a great one :)

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Guest Dragonfruit
well done your so brave i cant even tell my friends.Your very admiral.

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Thank you - but I'm honestly not.

And to quote my psych "you CAN tell your friends - you just HAVEN'T told them" :thumbup:

The CAN'T word has been banned from our sessions!

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Guest ScottOCDid

Hi DF,

Well done!!!! We're obviously all very proud of you for being brave enough to go through with the interview.

Your earlier worries were completely unfounded! :mad:

S

:hug: :) :2guns:

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