Thoughts Back With A Vengeance

[Guest patsy]

Hi there,

I try not to post negatively very often but this morning I'm compelled to post as I don't know where else to turn. As many of you who know me will probably realise that I have been quite a bit better for a while. Not so now. The last few days my intrusive thinking has come back with a pure vengeance and I'm just about at my wits end. I've tried all of my techniques to help but nothing is working at all for me . I'm so scared. The thoughts I have had are so bad I can't even say what they are.

I suppose there isn't really much anyone can do to help me. I'm really just posting in the hope that some of you wil be able to give me some support to help me through.

Patsy x

[Guest sam]

Hi there,

I try not to post negatively very often but this morning  I'm compelled to post as I don't know where else to turn.  As many of you who know me will probably realise that I have been quite a bit better for a while.  Not so now. The last few days my intrusive thinking has come back with a pure vengeance and I'm just about  at my wits end.  I've tried all of my techniques to help but nothing is working at all for me  .  I'm so scared.  The thoughts I have had are so bad I can't even say what they are.

I suppose there isn't really much anyone can do to help me.  I'm really just posting in the hope that some of you wil be able to give me some support to help me through.

Patsy x

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[Guest tangoblu]

Hi Patsy

Sorry to hear that things are tough for you atm... maybe you could try distracting yourself - maybe take a walk, go shopping - anything to try and keep your mind focussed on something else??

Sending you a big hug

Pam

[Guest summerleft]

Hi patsy

Have you been particularly stressed about something over the past few days?

I found even though mostly my ocd is now under control sometimes if say ive had a argument my thoughts get worse

even something like lack of sleep can irritate my ocd into action.

dont worry though im sure youll feel better soon, do you have any computer games? i find these work wonders to take your mind elsewhere

[Guest scarednortheast]

patsy i wanna say ya hav been amazin to m since i joined this thing. u r very strong and i think an important thing to remember is each time the ocd comes ya know its goin to get better and u know eventually u willd eal with it. i think of mine now as a broken leg at times, i cant help it i wudnt punish myself if i cudnt walk therefore im not punishin myself for havin a dodgy chemical imbalance. spoil urself, watch some tv(even tho i know ya wont concentrate), eat some nice food, etc just generally pamper urself, u=ya haven asked foer this illness n it shal pass u know that as well as i do its just time but wen in the middle of it u cant see this take care xxxx

[whitebeam]

The last few days my intrusive thinking has come back with a pure vengeance and I'm just about  at my wits end.  I've tried all of my techniques to help but nothing is working at all for me  .  I'm so scared.  The thoughts I have had are so bad I can't even say what they are.

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Hi Patsy,

Sorry things are so tough at the moment, but hang in there. OCD is very up and down in its nature and this is just a really bad time, but it will turn around for you.

Thinking of you.

Take care

whitebeam

[Guest Brainstrain]

Hi Patsy

Sorry to hear you're having such a bad time, it's so horrible when you think you're doing ok and then it comes back and slaps you in the face! You just have to keep focussing on the fact that it is just your OCD not you.

Good Luck

Brainstrain

[Northern Star]

Hiya Patsy,

Just sending you a massive hug ((((((((Pats))))))))))

You know and I know and everyone on here knows that these thoughts you're having are that OCD trying to upset you. It's nothing else I promise you. They really are just thoughts. I don't know what else to say. You know where I am if you need me.

Jo

[blue]

Hi Pats ((Hugs))xx

Just wanted to send my support too hunny, I'm so sorry you're having such a rough time :crybaby: . Keep fighting Pats, You will get through this (((Hugs))).

Things will get better hun, They really will .

We're all here for you hunny .

Hope things get better for you real soonxx

Loadsa Love

Blue (((Hugs)))xx

[Guest meg5]

Hi Patsy, I am sorry you are feeling so bad. I am sending you love and encouragement.

You have been so helpful to me and many people. I know you will come out the other side of this even though it probably looks and feels so grim at the moment.

With love Meg.

[catherine]

Hi Patsy

So sorry your thoughts are so bad at the mo. I honestly do understand what you're going through and it is utterly draining both physically and emotionally . The only advice I can offer is to say that if your body is telling you to rest or sleep then you must do so. During my 'episodes' I get so exhausted I can sleep for a couple of days as I'm coming out of it. Go with your body and treat yourself in any way you can. I tend to hibernate but you may prefer going for a walk......mind you if I lived in Scotty land I might be tempted to walk

We don't need to tell you that it's the OCD at work here, you are not a bad person and never will be. It's that :confused1: imp at work.

Take care and God Bless

Catherine

[Guest kirk27]

Hi there patsy

Try this , get yourself a book a good book or a magazine somthing that is new and and you can engage in become absorbed in, get relaxed on you bed and read it try (easer said than done i know) dont move, enjoy , relax, and really try to focus on your magazine , this all may sound silly of stupid but in 2001 i was being bullied by my brain somthing terable so .i just stopped ..........grabbed a mag led on my bed and i said i am not moving from this place for know one!!! over the next 2 hours i had nowhere to go know one to talk too, nothing to engage with, and my mind was focused on NOTHING but my magazine,

START A REVOLUTION FROM YOUR BED , :confused1: .i did.

[Guest alpha]

Hi Patsy,

Just adding my support to all the others.

I know you know all this, and I don't mean to tell you stuff you undoubtedly already know, but sometimes I have found it helpful in the past to read what others have written, as it affirms what I have been thinking and sometimes then makes it easier for me to accept.

It's the OCD. You know the thoughts mean nothing. They are not some hidden wish fulfillment (? I think this comes from Brainlock, sorry if I'm wrong.) They are not indicative of your true self, just your OCD brain, not your rational, real brain. Everyone gets these thoughts, but we OCDers are just so sensitive to them we cannot just let them drift by, we pay attention to them and whammo, they come back even stronger.

Another thing to think about is accepting that there is the remotest chance that you could act them out (after all, we are all capable of just about anything), although this is hard to do - accept this fact and then do something else, as everyone has suggested. Try not to let those thoughts have power over you.

Everyone goes through bad times when the OCD brain seems to go into overdrive. Hang in there! :confused1:

Take care,

Alpha

[Caramoole]

Hi Patsy

Sorry you're feeling so rough at the moment, I've been a bit like that this week with OCD trying to drag me into the loop and almost made the mistake of listening in :confused1:

You've been through such a lot lately with your little dog, weeks and weeks of illness, watching, waiting, wondering and all the fear and anxiety that brings to a pet owner, never mind an OCD pet owner. Then you've been through a period of mourning which is every bit as real and painful as any other loss. You just start to get through the other side and whallop, OCD will see the gap and dive in, it grabs you when you least expect it sometimes.

It's difficult keeping occupied when you feel so dreaful but worth a try. What about getting in the garden and putting some flowers in around the magnolia

Don't underestimate all you've gone through and the effect it's having now.

You'll move past this again. Even though it seems every bit as bad as before, it usually isn't because we've a few more tools up our sleeves.

We're all here Patsy, so shout out

Take care

Caramoole x

[Guest patsy]

Hi everone,

Just to say a huge 'thankyou' to you all for your support. It really means loads to me. I do feel better knowing I have so many valuable friends here.

It has been a hard day again but I'm sure, like I always tell other people here, that I will get through it.

I'm of to bed now coz I've had enough for today.

Thankyou all again, you're great :confused1:

Love Patsy xxx

[photog]

Hi Patsy sorry you are not so good i'm not a sufferer but this ocd can hit you bad then seem to clear its very irational. Saw you at stirling you looked and seemed great. Every body else whos answered have said it all just wanted to add my thoughts of support hope it clears soon

ed :confused1:

[Guest patsy]

Thanks ed

I remember meeting you at the conference. Thanks so much for your kind words.

Love Patsy xx

[Guest patsy]

Been to see my doctor today and he has increased my tabs again to the maximum dose (citlopram) just to help me through the bad patch I am going through at the moment.

He says it's related to the bereavement of my wee dog. Could have triggered of my OCD badly again.

Anyways, we shall see how the extra meds go. Thanks again all of you for your messages of support and pms etc

Love patsy xxx

[Guest Steviemfc]

Sorry, just geting round to your post Patsy.

Hope that you start to feel better again soon. Going to see the doc was a positive step for you.

Take care

Stevie

[whitebeam]

Been to see my doctor today and he has increased my tabs again to the maximum dose (citlopram) just to help me through the bad patch I am going through at the moment. 

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Hi Patsy,

Hope that the meds will kick in and you will soon feel better .

Take care

whitebeam

[blue]

Hi Pats,

I really hope the meds start working and that you start to feel better real soon hunny xx

Take good care of yourself,

Love Bluexx

[Guest hope125]

Hi, nice to meet you patsy!

You and I sound rather alike. I found this website only very recently and have found it a great comfort. I too have been good for a while, however am having a blip 'bad thoughts' and have found the people on this site amazing. There is so much support!!

Anyway just wanted to let you know that i know how you feel. Just bare in mind that we know what it is, first time i had 'bad thoughts' i thought i was going round the bend and was a very bad person!! It's so strange because i fully understand where and how bad thoughts come about and can quite happily support other people but it is very hard to listen to my own advice!

A technique i sometimes try to 'do away with a bad thought' is to imagine a computer desktop, well, drag the image/thought into the recycle bin on the desktop! May sound daft but can help on bad days. Also, you could try thinking of something really silly e.g. 'yellow spotty dogs' when a bad thought comes your way, again sounds daft but this is supposed to help train your mind to see how silly the bad thought is. Hope that makes sense, just a few ideas i have picked up from my sessions with a therapist.

I take Lustral and have CBT, do not need to see my therapist as often now. however went this week, she assured me i didn't need to be hospitalised in a psychiatric unit! and my bad thoughts were beginning to lift, but it just takes a little thing to set me off again e.g. i'll read something about ocd (just got imp of the mind book), not like it, and worry that maybe i really am bad, maybe i want to do these things even think that i want to when i really don't!!! God that sounds crazy doesn't it!

The trick is as you well know is to keep occupied, accept he discomfort and the intense fear will pass. Really need to get that in my head today because i know it works!!!!Try to focus on the good things, it could never be as frightening now as it has been in the past, the more we have bouts of 'bad thought' the more we build up our resilience to them.

Fell free to pm me if you want to talk or send me a message on the main board, maybe we could help each other.

Take care

Hope

xxx

sorry rambled on again. hope u feel better soon xxxxxxx

[dandielion]

Hi Patsy, sorry to hear you're feeling so bad. It's always 2 steps forward and 1 back. It always picks on us when we're at our lowest doesn't it? I've been very down the past two days - maybe they've put something in our water supply! I'm not far away if you want to talk and I can always stop by. Just take it one day at a time.

mandy x

[Guest Scooby Doo]

Hi Patsy,

I just like to say hang on in there. I to suffer from Pure O, and like you when I lost Sally,my border collie. My OCD took a dive. However somehow you do come through it, life does go on. The trouble with Pure O is when you think your`re in control, it sneaks up and bites you on the bum. Its like your Constantly testing yourself. OCD doesn`t like a happy ship. So the only thing to do is when it raises its ugly head, tell it to Naf Off!

Take Care

Scooby Doo

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