Told them so!

[Guest Bushbaby]

I am a proud mum today on so many levels! I just want to share it with everyone!

My daughter was discharged from hospital just over a year ago. On returning to school after a five month absence, school wanted to move her from the top Set to a low Set and decided she was a failure in Maths and Science: the two departments who never sent her any work while she was in hospital. I fought the school and the Head wouldn't support me, even though I work there...it's all about data evidence and kids are more than numbers, but he can't see that. He said the results stand for themselves. I begged them to give her a chance and they said they would give her until Christmas to prove herself. By Christmas she was doing well.

Today I have been to her Awards Evening at school. She has just received the Year 9 Prize for Maths as she beat her target level by over one level. They said she would scrape a level 6c. She achieved a 7a. I was so proud watching her hold her head up high and confidently receive her award in front of hundreds of parents, teachers and students. What a vindication for my fight! Not only that but her progress report has her over-achieving in every subject area. It just goes to show that once she got herself well, she can succeed to the best of her ability. It was the illness that was holding her back and she has won a huge victory over this illness.

I just wanted to shout 'I told you so'. A great day for Hannah. She is not just doing well at school but she is battling this horrible illness every day of her life. I'm sure only you will appreciate how I feel today. It's great to share a positive OCD story today...it could all change tomorrow...but every step forward is precious, don't you think?

Thanks for listening.

Edited July 7, 2011 by Bushbaby

[pottypotter]

This is Brilliant, as a Mummy I can imagine how proud you are!!

Well done to you both xx :clapping:

[Guest Tescbury]

I am a proud mum today on so many levels! I just want to share it with everyone!

My daughter was discharged from hospital just over a year ago. On returning to school after a five month absence, school wanted to move her from the top Set to a low Set and decided she was a failure in Maths and Science: the two departments who never sent her any work while she was in hospital. I fought the school and the Head wouldn't support me, even though I work there...it's all about data evidence and kids are more than numbers, but he can't see that. He said the results stand for themselves. I begged them to give her a chance and they said they would give her until Christmas to prove herself. By Christmas she was doing well.

Today I have been to her Awards Evening at school. She has just received the Year 9 Prize for Maths as she beat her target level by over one level. They said she would scrape a level 6c. She achieved a 7a. I was so proud watching her hold her head up high and confidently receive her award in front of hundreds of parents, teachers and students. What a vindication for my fight! Not only that but her progress report has her over-achieving in every subject area. It just goes to show that once she got herself well, she can succeed to the best of her ability. It was the illness that was holding her back and she has won a huge victory over this illness.

I just wanted to shout 'I told you so'. A great day for Hannah. She is not just doing well at school but she is battling this horrible illness every day of her life. I'm sure only you will appreciate how I feel today. It's great to share a positive OCD story today...it could all change tomorrow...but every step forward is precious, don't you think?

Thanks for listening.

[Guest Tescbury]

Hi

Well done to Hannah, and yourself for being there. It's wonderful to hear some positive news surrounding OCD. Wishing my sweet daughter could be in that place too. She will be one day I am sure

Take care

Gaynor

[pottypotter]

Here's hoping she will be Gaynor xx :hug:

[Guest worriedmum]

:clapping: You DID tell them so... and so did she! WELL DONE! What great news to read. So pleased for you and you have a right to be proud on so many levels. Take care. x

[Guest legend]

:clapping: You DID tell them so... and so did she! WELL DONE! What great news to read. So pleased for you and you have a right to be proud on so many levels. Take care. x

Here here. :clapping:

[Guest nettles585]

HAHA TOLD YOU SO!!!! So proud of her, clever girl!!

You wouldnt believe this but im at college studying engineering and a certain teacher I have discriminates against me because i got really distressed one day at college so it means i only got a pass and a merit in his lesson rather than the distinction i deserve because he wouldnt let me do it! My other teachers let me do whatever i wanted and i got my distinctions! They think i should write a complaint against him because im a loony i cant study its a load of rubbish, im letting it blow over and telling him next year i can exceed to his beliefs what a horrible person ay ? x

Well done for her, people with ocd are often clever and thats why we spend so much time obsessing!! WELL DONE! x

[Mel1971]

hi

so chuffed to read about your daughter, that amazing!!! well done Hannah!! :clapping:

I am proud today too - Lorna got all 5's on her SAT's in Year 6, so above expected levels for her age group

xx well done bushbaby xx

[Guest Bushbaby]

Hi Everyone

Thanks so much for all of your support.

Even better news today. CAMHS don't want to see Hannah for 3 months. They trust us all to get on with things at long last for a good period of time. Hannah has come such a long way.

Gaynor, your daughter will get there. It's taken us 12 years to get to this point. Today just reminded me how far we have all come. Things have changed so much for us over the last two years from seriously bad to something really positive. It can be done, Gaynor! Your daughter will get there. Just hang on in there.

Well done to Lorna, Mel, and to you too. That's great news and you should be really proud of her. I agree with Nettles. OCD kids are really bright and they can show it when they are well.

Nettles, you keep being yourself. Unfortunately lots of people just don't get OCD. After all my colleagues know about what I've been through with Hannah, one teacher sat next to me at break time today and joked with staff that she's 'a little bit OCD'. I gave her a look of contempt and the rest of the staff went bananas with her. I didn't need to say a word! It's that level of ignorance that prevents young people from making progress, but you are right Nettles. Let it wash over you. You know how successful you can be by sticking to your own ideas. You will do brilliantly, I'm sure. At least some of the teachers at my school understand OCD now and that can only be a good thing. It's a shame the rest of the world don't always understand.

Thanks everyone. You really are a great bunch!

Julie xxx

[pottypotter]

And you are great too, i hope I can be as good a mummy as you xx I'm trying xx

[kc73]

I am a proud mum today on so many levels! I just want to share it with everyone!

My daughter was discharged from hospital just over a year ago. On returning to school after a five month absence, school wanted to move her from the top Set to a low Set and decided she was a failure in Maths and Science: the two departments who never sent her any work while she was in hospital. I fought the school and the Head wouldn't support me, even though I work there...it's all about data evidence and kids are more than numbers, but he can't see that. He said the results stand for themselves. I begged them to give her a chance and they said they would give her until Christmas to prove herself. By Christmas she was doing well.

Today I have been to her Awards Evening at school. She has just received the Year 9 Prize for Maths as she beat her target level by over one level. They said she would scrape a level 6c. She achieved a 7a. I was so proud watching her hold her head up high and confidently receive her award in front of hundreds of parents, teachers and students. What a vindication for my fight! Not only that but her progress report has her over-achieving in every subject area. It just goes to show that once she got herself well, she can succeed to the best of her ability. It was the illness that was holding her back and she has won a huge victory over this illness.

I just wanted to shout 'I told you so'. A great day for Hannah. She is not just doing well at school but she is battling this horrible illness every day of her life. I'm sure only you will appreciate how I feel today. It's great to share a positive OCD story today...it could all change tomorrow...but every step forward is precious, don't you think?

Thanks for listening.

Julie-I am just reading through old messages and I really wanted to say a BIG well done to you and your daughter! I Totally empathise and hear where you are coming from. I have posted on/off on this board about my 7yr daughter who had severe OCD fluctuating in severity over past 18mth. We are in bad phase and waiting for hospital assessment. Throughout the 18mth has been a constant battle with her school to understand the impact of her condition etc and I am genuinely very elated for you that Hannah has managed to show her true abilities when her OCD isn't in the fore front. It's just so exhausting and frustrating to battle all the time isn't it?

Kc x

[Guest Bushbaby]

Hi KC

Thanks for your reply. It's much appreciated.

Yes, it is exhausting and frustrating to be battling OCD all of the time. I feel like a demented, over-protective, fussy mother most of the time and my life revolves around Hannah, through no fault of anyone's but definitely the fault of OCD.

I am sorry to hear that things are difficult for you and your daughter at the minute. I know what you are going through. Hannah was also living with OCD from a very young age, but I do hope her story gives you a bit of hope that this illness can be conquered. The hospital stay was very difficult, but it was the best thing we ever did to put Hannah on her road to recovery. The rest was up to her and she has taken up the battle and her life is changing for the better. I do hope that your daughter is given the help she needs, so that she can be like every other child and enjoy her life.

I don't know about you, but I am so grateful for OCD-UK's website and the forums, as I would have cracked up a long time ago. It has been such a support through really difficult times and it's the empathy that helps. Only OCD sufferer's parents understand what OCD sufferer's parents are going through...and it's the same experiences with school, CAMHS and our children etc. We have all been through such a lot and we are united in the fact that we don't give up on our kids. We just want them well.

I hope you are getting the support you need from the health providers. I also hope that the summer isn't too stressful for you and your daughter. It's always a challenge when the routine is broken. I have just gone for action-packed this summer, as it prevents thinking time and worrying time...and we all know what happens then!!!

Wouldn't it be lovely one day to wake up and to never have to think about this illness? I dream of that day. I'm sure you do too!

Good luck, KC. I hope the assessment goes well and help can be accessed as soon as possible. Your daughter will get there in the end, but it's not an easy process and I don't envy you what you are going through at the minute, but it can get better and it will get better, however long it takes. :hug:

[Mel1971]

Yes, it is exhausting and frustrating to be battling OCD all of the time. I feel like a demented, over-protective, fussy mother most of the time and my life revolves around Hannah, through no fault of anyone's but definitely the fault of OCD.

I have had no end of troubles at Lorna's now old school, because she was bright, because she was well behaved at school, because she was willing to help out (sometimes at her own detriment) - they couldnt see the bigger picture and I think either thought i was a fussy over protective mum or that what happened at home after stress at school was somehow 'my' fault!! Even after the psych came to the school they still seemed to have this attitude of 'Lorna's very bright, a good girl whats her mum on about?' grr!

I emailed her new senior school tutor and I explained everything, the tutor is lovely she asked me to tell her first hand and gave me her school email address. I sent a really long email explaining every facet of her ocd and how it affects her at school and at home.

And wow within three hours she sent a reply back saying she wanted to set up a Pupil Support Worker to see Lorna every week at different times so it wouldnt affect the same lesson every week, but Lorna would know in advance when it was going to be. And she said she knew someone with ocd and had a slight insight to that, and would help in anyway and for me to contact her directly if anything was troubling me! In Lornas senior school the Tutor and Year Head actually move up the school with the children so barring maternity or resignation she will have the same Tutor and Year Head all the way thru school. I am still wary but her reply was really helpful, she said she would make the other teachers aware of Lorna's issues at school and if anything upset Lorna, we should go straight to the tutor.

Lorna has been touched innaproprietly by boys and not said anything till a few days later, she has also been bullied by a boy who supposedly had a crush on her and not said anything till I saw the bruises, she wont tell the teacher if anything happens to her, I dearly hope she builds a strong rapport with this teacher and can tell her if anything goes wrong!

take care xx

[Guest Bushbaby]

Hi Mel

That does sound very positive for Lorna, as far as the Form Tutor is concerned. It is also good that the Tutor is with Lorna for 5 years, as it is a pain having to explain yourself every year to teachers and some just don't get it. I am sure once she gets to know the teacher she will feel confident to confide any issues. Hopefully there won't be any, but I know why you are worried. All this change is stressful and plays havoc with OCD!

Hannah sounds similar to Lorna in the sense that she is bright, conscientious and doesn't cause anyone any bother and she doesn't look like she has a problem!!!! They do not see all of the hard work that goes in at home to make sure that our children can function at school. Hannah's Primary School Head insisted she didn't have a problem and it was all in my head. I am sure the staff at my school think I'm just neurotic but I don't care. Hannah comes first for me and I will keep battling away to make sure she is happy and successful in her life.

I hope the transition goes well for Lorna, as it is such a stressful time for both the child and the family. I am impressed that there will be support worker help available. I have had to fight for extra time for Hannah for exams, as it takes her longer to complete papers as she checks and doubts herself. This is improving and in her GCSE English she insisted on sitting in the main exam hall with the rest of the year group, as she doesn't want to stand out. She saw it as a dry run for the real GCSEs that start in earnest from September (far too early in my opinion!)Quite a mature response, I thought. If Lorna gets this support now, you won't have the fight on your hands, if she needs the extra help later.

Fingers crossed all goes well and try not to worry.

Julie x

Edited July 29, 2011 by Bushbaby

[Guest Annabel]

Yay, that's amazing! :clapping:. Told them good!

[Mel1971]

hi Julie,

I do hope all goes well in september for Hannah, shes been through so much, but what a fighter! She didnt let those teachers who put her down get away with it!

Lorna has problems with homework, if she feels its not right or the paper is creased or she feels something about it is 'wrong' she will destroy it or hide it. Shes not looking forward to Senior School at all!

I am of the opinion now that I dont care what they think of me, like you all i am concerned about is Lorna's welfare and whats right for her. I will ring up/send letters in/confront people and come across very probably as neurotic and confrontational. I have unfortunately found myself that unless you get a 'thick skin' and tackle things head on then nothing gets done.

Yes they can take revenge, I was given back of the hall seats last month to Lorna's first ever lead performance in 'we will rock you' - her first major part in 6 years! I of course complained and they suddenly found seats in row 3! On the night I stood up at the end of the front row, and a kind TA got me a chair, so I did end up in the front row!!! What they didnt understand, and what hurt the most, was that I was there not just to watch the performance, but to help Lorna and give her a boost.

Her new school have already told me that her old school found me 'awkward'!! I said to the Senior School Support Worker who said that - 'you bet i am'!!! :lol:

take care and thanks xx

[Guest Bushbaby]

Hi Mel

Good for you! :clapping:

I know exactly where you are coming from! I think OCD mums are a certain breed. We have to be to help our children get on. If it's any comfort, I am an awkward mum too, but it's because they don't get it and no matter how hard I try to explain, they still don't get it. Like you, I am also past caring what people think. I have a bigger picture to look at.

I spent time explaining to staff about contamination and how it affects Hannah and her Head of Year told me she must be getting better because she was sat on the field in PE and got her hands dirty holding a rugby ball without crying. Dirty hands weren't the issue. Her hands didn't have to be physically dirty to feel contaminated. She gave me a look like I'm crackers. I get it...so why don't they?

We also have another student with OCD and anorexia at school, who was in the same hospital as Hannah. She has had a lot of support from a colleague of mine who, through my experiences, actually understands OCD. I offered to have her in Year 9 as I would be able to continue the support that had already been provided. Of course this wasn't possible and they moved me to be a Year 8 Form Tutor instead, so this poor girl will have no continuity now as the Head of Year is too stressed to care and the teacher I was replaced with is a princess and can't look after anyone but herself. The Head told me I wouldn't be able to help her, as it's a different type of OCD...really!!! Same OCD, different child. I get that! My colleague has worked so hard with her too and it could all be wasted due to thoughtlessness. At least some staff at Lorna's school appear to have their heads screwed on.

Well done to Lorna for taking part in the show too. :clapping: That's amazing! She must have conquered some fear to do that. A real proud parent moment for you there!

September will be interesting for all of us, but we will get through it and our girls will be successful. Honest they will! You can tell I'm full of hope. It's the summer holidays and still July!

Take care. Julie x

[Mel1971]

We also have another student with OCD and anorexia at school, who was in the same hospital as Hannah. She has had a lot of support from a colleague of mine who, through my experiences, actually understands OCD. I offered to have her in Year 9 as I would be able to continue the support that had already been provided. Of course this wasn't possible and they moved me to be a Year 8 Form Tutor instead, so this poor girl will have no continuity now as the Head of Year is too stressed to care and the teacher I was replaced with is a princess and can't look after anyone but herself. The Head told me I wouldn't be able to help her, as it's a different type of OCD...really!!! Same OCD, different child. I get that! My colleague has worked so hard with her too and it could all be wasted due to thoughtlessness. At least some staff at Lorna's school appear to have their heads screwed on.

Its so frustrating re the Year Head - when you specifically explained what about contamination fears and then for the Year Heaad to make a crass comment like that! Whats so frustrating is that we are more than willing to help explain and educate teachers/TA's etc about OCD, and its just like its bouncing off a brick wall!!

As for the other student I feel for her, and I was astounded by the Head's comments about her ocd!! Ocd is ocd. It wouldnt happen with a physical illness - say if you had a child with diabetes Type 1 and had in depth knowledge about Diabetes, they wouldnt turn around and say 'oh you cant have this other student in your group as shes got Diabetes Type 2, its a different type of diabetes' would they??

I hope you and Hannah have a great summer hols, give her our best wishes and congratulations for doing so well. I am enjoying the time out! And have a HUGE pack of stuff to read through and endless forms to fill in for Senior School - it keeps moving to the bottom of my To Do List :lol:

take care xx

[Guest heatherb]

I am a proud mum today on so many levels! I just want to share it with everyone!

My daughter was discharged from hospital just over a year ago. On returning to school after a five month absence, school wanted to move her from the top Set to a low Set and decided she was a failure in Maths and Science: the two departments who never sent her any work while she was in hospital. I fought the school and the Head wouldn't support me, even though I work there...it's all about data evidence and kids are more than numbers, but he can't see that. He said the results stand for themselves. I begged them to give her a chance and they said they would give her until Christmas to prove herself. By Christmas she was doing well.

Today I have been to her Awards Evening at school. She has just received the Year 9 Prize for Maths as she beat her target level by over one level. They said she would scrape a level 6c. She achieved a 7a. I was so proud watching her hold her head up high and confidently receive her award in front of hundreds of parents, teachers and students. What a vindication for my fight! Not only that but her progress report has her over-achieving in every subject area. It just goes to show that once she got herself well, she can succeed to the best of her ability. It was the illness that was holding her back and she has won a huge victory over this illness.

I just wanted to shout 'I told you so'. A great day for Hannah. She is not just doing well at school but she is battling this horrible illness every day of her life. I'm sure only you will appreciate how I feel today. It's great to share a positive OCD story today...it could all change tomorrow...but every step forward is precious, don't you think?

Thanks for listening.

[Guest Wazza]

Hey Bushbaby, I'm new to these forums but after reading your story I just felt compelled to reply. Absolutely brilliant stuff. I'm well chuffed for you and your daughter. It's an inspirational story!

Wazza.