Guest lucylia Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Just goes to show you how strong it can be. I could have believe i was aroused by my front door,feel aroused, the feeling of arousal stay with me and theres only so long someone can go with the feeling of arousal before relieveing themselves. Dont make them bad people. And i USED to feel guilty. Couldnt care less now Lucy xxx Link to comment
Guest Gloria123 Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Yes, I understand. I never dared me to masterbate after I got that arousal feeling - fortunately it never lasted very long. The worst feeling is if ocd tells you that you like to see that naked kid and that you enjoy having that feeling although you want to get rid of it...terrible and i still can´t believe how strong ocd and that it´s so mightful to make us think and feel the weirdest things... Link to comment
Guest lucylia Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Well it can and it does hunni. I try to laugh now ar some of the thinghs ocd has made me worry about. Its just madness x but you have all us here, a loving partner and every reason to believe you will overcome this xx Lucy xxx Link to comment
Guest Gloria123 Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 I still venerate you, that you are so strong...It´s like a embargo in my head that makes me unable to believe that this arousal is not because of the kids...i mean i look at them and get the feeling and for me it seems to be clear that it´s because of them... but, if i´m honest: i don´t want to because aroused because of ocd neither...so i still can´t chum up with the fact that it´s "just" ocd Link to comment
Guest Gloria123 Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 i mean of course i can imagine that fear can lead to feelings and sensations....for example: if you have the fear that you have lice (is that the correct English word?) and concentrate on that and you know that they crawl over your head....of course that your head starts to scratch and itch... but I mean...we are talking about real arousal...and that is something which is more disturbing Link to comment
Guest lucylia Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 None of us who experience this WANT to be aroused because of our ocd. None of us want to have ocd altogether. But we do have it and until you accept that, you wont get over it xx i actually envy you in a sense. Im assuming you dont have children?? Well i have a son.... Just imagine what ocd has done to me concerning thoughts over my own child. A child i have to see every day, which didnt help when i was in the depths of ocd x lucy xxx Link to comment
Guest Gloria123 Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 well yes, i believe that that was really hard...at the moment i think that i´ll never be able to have a kid....i´m sure that it´s much harder and a fight in every minute. so it´s really admirable what you reached how long did you have ocd (I mean the periode where it was really heavy)? You also got CBT? also medications? what else have you done? Link to comment
Guest lucylia Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Ive had OCD since i was 3 years old. First diagnosed at 5. Was actually put on meds at 5 but the meds i was on have since been taken off the market. I had it on and off really bad when i was younger. But the periods of not being bad were longer when i was younger. But as i got older the longest i remember feeling "ok" was probably about 2 months. For most of my adult life i have had it pretty bad. At times so bad i was almost hospitalised, my weight plummeted to under 6 stone. I have been in some states. Ive had loads of cbt, countless meds. And yes it helped a little, but most of my recovery came from me. I think i finally got to a point where i just completely had enough and out of nowhere started to believe in myself and believe i had an illness that caused all my bad thoughts. Believe i was a good person. I still think you should give cbt a chance as i know its worked wonders for alot of people xx Lucy xxx Link to comment
Guest Gloria123 Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 wow so that´s really a long story...but still great that you reached that point! Can you tell me how you were able to say "that´s just ocd"? that seems to be very hard...i mean, as i already told, i always think there´s a kid, i´m aroused, so there must be a connection between those two elements...i guess it needs a lot of trust in yourself and strength to be able to say that it´s just an illness right? Link to comment
Guest lucylia Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 As for kids, you will feel ready to have them one day. But i wouldnt advise trying just now. Not because i think for a second you would be a danger, but because your in the grips of your illness and need to be well and in control of it. Id say the same to someone who was recovering from a physical injury. Let yourself get well first xxx Lucy xxx Link to comment
Guest lucylia Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 If it wasnt because of your illness, you wouldnt feel guilt. You would enjoy those feelings because you would have a different sickness. You wouldnt feel repulsed or anxious or question yourself. You certainly would not be in an ocd forum if you didnt have this illness that was causing all these unwanted thoughts etc. Yes it takes alot of trust and faith in yourself. Somewhere inside there is your gut instinct. You cant feel it right now but you will and you will realise you feel these things because of your ocd. And like i said its not "you see a kid, then you feel aroused" .... Its you see a kid and subconciously your ocd kicks in, then you feel aroused. Thats the link gloria xx Lucy xxx Link to comment
Guest Gloria123 Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 yes...it it because ocd can get control over the limbic system in our brain which is also responsible for our sexual arousal? do you know that? Link to comment
Guest lucylia Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Ahhh i didnt know that, however i have just looked it up. Intersting reading. Maybe something you should post on here xx Lucy xxx Link to comment
Guest Gloria123 Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 well i just read it in Schwartz - Brain Lock...he says that "when a person with ocd is symptomatic, the matabolic activity rate not only increases in the orbital cortex, but locks together with the activity in the caudate nucleus, the THALAMUS, and the cingulate gyrus" (p. 57)....and when you are sexual aroused the limbic system is active i guess. The limbic system (or Paleomammalian brain) is a set of brain structures, including the hippocampus, amygdalae, anterior thalamic nuclei, septum, limbic cortex and fornix, which seemingly support a variety of functions including emotion, behavior, motivation, long-term memory, and olfaction, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limbic_system ). "These neurochemical changes take place primarily in the limbic system, a very old part of the brain with circuitry that is common to all mammals. These ancient limbic circuits control almost all bodily functions." (http://www.reuniting.info/science/sex_in_the_brain) i don´t know if there is any connection?? Link to comment
Guest lucylia Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Sounds accurate to me. I find alot of the "science stuff hard to understand lol...... I believe it, just alot of long words in there. Do you feel like you are beginning to get some closure on this or the answers you needed? Xx Lucy xxx Link to comment
Guest Gloria123 Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Well I guess that´s something I have to accept...for better or for worse....it´s still hard for me to understand or rather to accept it because i´m still surprised how this is possible... it´s hard for me to accept and that there are no more answers... Link to comment
Guest lucylia Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Whats 4 + 1?? 5 . . . Whats 1 + 4?? . . . 5. Doesnt matter how you look at it, it will always be the same answer. No matter how hard you try to find another one, you never will. So whats the point in trying for an impossibilty. You will never understand why (just like all of us) why this illness works the way it does. It just does. Lucy xxx Link to comment
Guest Gloria123 Posted September 15, 2012 Share Posted September 15, 2012 Yes that´s why...but it´s still hard to accept...and i´m still worrying... Link to comment
Guest lucylia Posted September 15, 2012 Share Posted September 15, 2012 And you will continue to worry until you start putting what you have learned into practise xx Lucy xxx Link to comment
Guest Gloria123 Posted September 15, 2012 Share Posted September 15, 2012 But I somehow feel unable to start because the worries that it really is a real arousal are so huge Link to comment
Guest lucylia Posted September 15, 2012 Share Posted September 15, 2012 Hope your feeling a bit better xx Lucy xxx Link to comment
Guest Gloria123 Posted September 15, 2012 Share Posted September 15, 2012 Not really...it still bothers me... Link to comment
Guest lucylia Posted September 15, 2012 Share Posted September 15, 2012 You have to try harder gloria. Your not doing any of the things being suggested to you to help you xxx Lucy xxx Link to comment
Guest Gloria123 Posted September 15, 2012 Share Posted September 15, 2012 I don´t know how to challenge it or rather the start...i´m so sad and depressed about the feeling being a real arousal that i don´t have the power to get over it Link to comment
Guest lucylia Posted September 15, 2012 Share Posted September 15, 2012 I know hunni. It is a sad thing and it is a hard thing to accept. But until you do, you will never get over it or used to the fact you have an illness that causes these feelings and thoughts. Xxx Lucy xxx Link to comment
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