I just want to give up university (second year) because of OCD

[Guest Transcendental]

I'm avoiding more and more people because of these intrusive thoughts, and I am staying at home more and getting more depressed. I live on my own, and find it really hard to cope without my family. What can I do?

[machiato]

Hi mate, have you received any therapy for this? The answer is difficult to apply but its actually in your own statement "I'm avoiding more and more people because of these intrusive thoughts, and I am staying at home more and getting more depressed" - in other words, the more you retreat the worse it gets. This is the OCD cycle that we all must break. Being away from your family is tough, so can you speak to a friend you trust? or a student counselor to give you some emotional support? Coincidentally, I was in second year uni when I had a bout of OCD. I hung on and got through the year, and year 3 was better. I really would encourage you to keep going if you can. If its a task that is simply out of your remit, then perhaps defer 1 module or something like that to give you some breathing space. But, generally speaking I'd guess that dropping out of Uni will have an adverse effect on your self-esteem. If you can.... Hang in there mate.

[Guest Annabel]

Hi Transcendental,

Sorry to hear that OCD is getting in the way of your education and social life. I think how you respond to this situation depends on a number of things- for example,

- Are you able to attend enough lectures to compile notes for your subjects?

- Are you submitting coursework and completing exams or unable to?

- If things continue as they are, will you be able to scrape by and make up for it in 3rd year? (or even do well!)

- Will the university let you take a leave of absence this far into the academic year?

- Have you received any help? (CBT, counselling etc).

I think you should talk to your parents and to someone at the Disability/ Enablement Office at your uni. Hopefully the Disability office can negotiate with tutors to give you extra time and allowances while you're ill (they might require a medical certificate stating that you have OCD or depression). They'll also know whether or not you could take a leave of absence if you wanted to.

I don't think it's a good idea to rush into withdrawing from university without having an idea of what you'd like to do instead. There aren't many jobs available at the moment and as you know fees will be £9,000 if you start another course. However you need to be healthy to be able to do anything. If you think you can scrape by this year (just another 2 or 3 months) then perhaps it's best to continue but ask for help from the university. If you're sure you can't cope then see about taking a leave of absence. You can always decide to withdraw entirely from uni during your leave of absence but you might find you want to return to give yourself the advantage of a degree!

Thinking of you. I know it's hard. I needed to take a leave of absence but couldn't and really wish I could have!

Edited February 21, 2013 by Annabel

[Guest pip_murray]

My OCD started during my first year of university and it was horrendous. However, developing OCD gave me a kick up the bottom and I managed to achieve a good degree and later a masters degree. We CAN achieve things DESPITE the condition, believe me.

[machiato]

Hi again Transcedental. I think you have been given advice above which covers most of the bases by people who have lived through it! Please take your time before making any decisions. And as Pip says, we CAN and DO achieve things, even while we carry these strains!

Best wishes,

M

[Guest Transcendental]

I'm so sick of this I've had it for years. Got CBT to treat my cleanliness OCD which has gone away but had pure O for much longer and I think it will be harder to beat. My exams in January suffered because of anxiety affecting my concentration last term and I'm not sure if there is much point getting a degree if I'm going to do badly. The area it most affects is independent study, however I do go to lectures and seminars. My parents know I have OCD, but I don't think they fully understand how much it affects me. I've spoken to my academic advisor, although not about OCD, but I'm not sure if there is much that can be done. But thanks for the advice and support, I will finish this term at least.

Edited February 21, 2013 by Transcendental

[machiato]

I understand. Mine has moved from other OCD types towards something more pure-o like and its been much harder to kick for me. Hang on pal, and in the summer you can take stock and get some help. Its then a good gap till September where the new term begins. I am feeling your pain, but keep the fight.

[Guest Transcendental]

I understand. Mine has moved from other OCD types towards something more pure-o like and its been much harder to kick for me. Hang on pal, and in the summer you can take stock and get some help. Its then a good gap till September where the new term begins. I am feeling your pain, but keep the fight.

Thanks for the reply. I think it is because pure O is much less tangible, the mind seems to contort itself to make the thing remain fearful, or find a counterexample against you when you find some relief.

[machiato]

MATE! ... I am going to print off what you just said and frame it on my wall. And one day when I beat this (you can do this too if you like), I will print off onto A3 paper and stick a giant pin through it right onto OCD's BIG FAT BUTT!

[Lotus]

Keep going, both of you. I've got Pure O - I try not to attach myself to the thoughts, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't ... we're entitled to live full happy lives like everyone else ... so let's go for it!!

[machiato]

Good advice Lotus. Best wishes to you too.

[Guest claireylou90]

Hi Transcendental

Just wanted to say keep with it and use services the university offers as much as you can. My OCD got much worse in my second year and thankfully I found the courage to talk to my personal tutor about it who was able to point me in the right direction of appropriate support services. This year (third year) after a little 'blip' earlier on in the year I have also now got a support plan in place as a safety net just incase I have trouble with deadlines and a support worker who I meet with on a weekly basis. so yes, use the support they offer because it is so worthwhile and can be a great help hope everything works out for you

[Guest pip_murray]

This is just from my own experiences: When I became "ill" and really thought I was losing my mind I desperately wanted to hang on to things I perceived as normal - one of those things was going to college even though I was really frightened and had no confidence. I felt bewildered, detached, lonely at times but OCD is in my opinion is definitely cyclical. At other times I had a good laugh down the Student Union with my friends and made good contributions in seminars etc. I wasn't always immobilised by OCD but when it is bad I think our confidence is eroded and we think we can't do things. The way I see it is that it is worth trying to hang on to things that help with your self-esteem - it took effort to get to university and you deserve to continue with your studies. OCD does not have to make you drop out. I genuinely believe that because that was my experience 15 years ago. You are stronger than OCD.

Best wishes,

Pip

[Guest Transcendental]

MATE! ... I am going to print off what you just said and frame it on my wall. And one day when I beat this (you can do this too if you like), I will print off onto A3 paper and stick a giant pin through it right onto OCD's BIG FAT BUTT!

Haha nice idea

Keep going, both of you. I've got Pure O - I try not to attach myself to the thoughts, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't ... we're entitled to live full happy lives like everyone else ... so let's go for it!!

Good advice Lotus, that's the best we can do isn't it?

Hi Transcendental

Just wanted to say keep with it and use services the university offers as much as you can. My OCD got much worse in my second year and thankfully I found the courage to talk to my personal tutor about it who was able to point me in the right direction of appropriate support services. This year (third year) after a little 'blip' earlier on in the year I have also now got a support plan in place as a safety net just incase I have trouble with deadlines and a support worker who I meet with on a weekly basis. so yes, use the support they offer because it is so worthwhile and can be a great help hope everything works out for you

I may tell my tutor about it....not sure if they will take me seriously

This is just from my own experiences: When I became "ill" and really thought I was losing my mind I desperately wanted to hang on to things I perceived as normal - one of those things was going to college even though I was really frightened and had no confidence. I felt bewildered, detached, lonely at times but OCD is in my opinion is definitely cyclical. At other times I had a good laugh down the Student Union with my friends and made good contributions in seminars etc. I wasn't always immobilised by OCD but when it is bad I think our confidence is eroded and we think we can't do things. The way I see it is that it is worth trying to hang on to things that help with your self-esteem - it took effort to get to university and you deserve to continue with your studies. OCD does not have to make you drop out. I genuinely believe that because that was my experience 15 years ago. You are stronger than OCD.

Best wishes,

Pip

The trouble is I have never settled in here, I don't have many friends because of social anxiety and living on my own makes it worse. But I'll keep trying

[Guest claireylou90]

If you don't think they will, what about your course leader? I was kind of lucky because my personal tutor is actually my course leader too which made it a little easier. If neither of those are suitable, does your uni have a student well-being service or equivalent?

Claire

[Guest sarah1984]

Hi Transcendental,

You've been given some really good advice above and I would strongly encourage you to talk to your tutor and student support services. You may well have to submit a doctor's letter to support your claim but the university is obliged to take your condition into account and make any reasonable adjustments. It's no good saying you might not be taken seriously and that you doubt they'll do anything to help when you haven't even asked yet. I suffered from severe anxiety during my second year at uni and I ended up taking a year's leave of absence in which I was able to fully recover and return to get a top degree. My supervisor and department couldn't have been more supportive.

Please don't suffer in silence because there is help available.

Sarah

[Guest Transcendental]

Hi Transcendental,

You've been given some really good advice above and I would strongly encourage you to talk to your tutor and student support services. You may well have to submit a doctor's letter to support your claim but the university is obliged to take your condition into account and make any reasonable adjustments. It's no good saying you might not be taken seriously and that you doubt they'll do anything to help when you haven't even asked yet. I suffered from severe anxiety during my second year at uni and I ended up taking a year's leave of absence in which I was able to fully recover and return to get a top degree. My supervisor and department couldn't have been more supportive.

Please don't suffer in silence because there is help available.

Sarah

Even if I get a first in all my other exams, it is still unlikely I will get a first overall, that's what I'm really annoyed about

[machiato]

Hi Transcendental, I feel you have been given some really good advice so far that covers pretty much all the bases. As for the first degree grade, I dont blame you for being annoyed, I am even a little pleased in a way as it shows you have not lost your targets in life, and because can you use this as a motivator to keep going? Viewing everyone's comments, I'd agree that a visit to the head tutor, adviser, dean of students, whatever to me seems a great idea, they can make suggestions, whether it be a deferral, extra time to complete work, counseling, whatever. I always believe in doing as much normal stuff as we possibly can rather than dropping out, because I believe this keeps us going. The key word is 'possible' as we all have our limits and you must be that judge, but should never do it without support. The other thing is PLEASE consider what the outcome of a term or year out would be. For some it would be positive, for others it would result in vegetating in bed for hours ruminating and avoiding life, with a weekly visit to a therapist, which has little affect as we go home and we are just back to square one. The decision must be yours however.

When I was in year 2 I was having an OCD meltdown and got 2:2 in all my grades and the odd 3rd! Years 3 I clawed it back to a 2:2 and then a 2:1 for the Masters. So, for you to even get close to a first, means I am in your debt Sir!!

[Guest Transcendental]

Hi Transcendental, I feel you have been given some really good advice so far that covers pretty much all the bases. As for the first degree grade, I dont blame you for being annoyed, I am even a little pleased in a way as it shows you have not lost your targets in life, and because can you use this as a motivator to keep going? Viewing everyone's comments, I'd agree that a visit to the head tutor, adviser, dean of students, whatever to me seems a great idea, they can make suggestions, whether it be a deferral, extra time to complete work, counseling, whatever. I always believe in doing as much normal stuff as we possibly can rather than dropping out, because I believe this keeps us going. The key word is 'possible' as we all have our limits and you must be that judge, but should never do it without support. The other thing is PLEASE consider what the outcome of a term or year out would be. For some it would be positive, for others it would result in vegetating in bed for hours ruminating and avoiding life, with a weekly visit to a therapist, which has little affect as we go home and we are just back to square one. The decision must be yours however.

When I was in year 2 I was having an OCD meltdown and got 2:2 in all my grades and the odd 3rd! Years 3 I clawed it back to a 2:2 and then a 2:1 for the Masters. So, for you to even get close to a first, means I am in your debt Sir!!

Yeah I suppose it is not the end of the world, but being a neurotic person I like to be obsessed with certain standards. I will go and see my academic advisor next week to tell her about my OCD...just hope she understands