will this anxiety ocd etc go ? (some sexual content)

[gingerbreadgirl]

what do you think the answer is sigh, based on what we've told you?

[Guest sigh1]

ocd then i suppose, but what is bothering me now why would i get erect or semi erect SOMETIMES over the thoughts and things i put myself through? is that ocd too? find it hard to believe it is it scares me to think what it is mainly if i really do like the thoughts thats on my mind now

[Guest sigh1]

really worried now gotta be up at 4am as i am going to norwich for the everton game, i dont believe ocd would cause me to get erections or semi erections sometimes about the gay thoughts i have had can someone reply please for the last time atleast askin about this kind of thing?

[Caramoole]

but what is bothering me now why would i get erect or semi erect SOMETIMES over the thoughts and things i put myself through?

Why? Because you are suffering from OCD and those are the sort of doubts it creates.

I have been a paedophile, a potential murderer, a psycopath, gay, someone who might mow someone down on pedestrian crossings, throw myself out of a car, drive into a wall, have high BP, have a heart attack, stab someone, shout abuse out at someones funeral.....etc, etc ad in finitum.

Am I any of these? On a bad day I think so...in reality, I am none. I am someone who is unfortunate to suffer from OCD as are you.

You are testing and checking, checking and testing. Testing, checking and checking again and again and again. Very normal/common OCD wise.

Ditch the porn/masturbation for now. It's not a normal, healthy, enjoyable behavior for you. Right now It's a checking procedure, a test, a compulsion...provoked by your OCD.

In order to change how we feel, we have to change our response to the doubts. I know how difficult this is...impossible it seems...but we must.

Keep reacting the same way, we get more of the same...more doubt, more fear, more anxiety.....more, more, more, more of the same.

"Don't feed the lion, it will bite"

I gave the Lion a burger and it bit me!!

"Don't feed the lion, it will bite"

I gave the Lion a burger and it bit me!!

Don't feed the Lion....It will always Bite and will always win

Scary and frightening as it seems, you have to change the way you react to to those doubts. Snuff the flame.....stop the checking behaviors. Testing won't make them stop.

Caramoole

[taurean]

She is so so right. ruminating, agonising, taking up vast amounts of time - all typical traits of OCD getting in the ascendancy and worrying the afflicted.

there is a vast wealth of experience amongst those people in this wonderful forum, and listening to it and believing it will help you fight back and win time back that is going into the void right now.

[gingerbreadgirl]

I once stayed up all night until 9 am and then called in sick to work, because I was going over and over a particular thought I was having, convinced that if I could just "find the answer" I could relax. But the answer to ocd questions like this can never, ever be found. The more I searched, the more of a state I got into until I ended up in absolute despair. The ONLY way to recover from these horrendous spikes is to resist the urge to think about it. You are obviously really struggling to do this, but I promise you, it's the only way. You well never find absolution from this if you keep doing what you're doing x

[Guest sigh1]

thanks, i know i need to stop but when i say no it feels like i am lying or want to, even at the match yesterday some steward looked like a girl i know yet i couldnt stop questioning would i do this and that but also said its maybe because he looks like a girl i know etc etc, the girl am speaking to i will be meeting in a few days probably which is good yet feels i wont enjoy it fully or thoughts will pop in my head like i would wanna kiss a man instead of her!!! sighhhh, also i am sick of getting thoughts when i see men maybe its because i know he has good looks yet people may say this is ok but not for me i wanna be able to see a person on the telly ( male ) and not think anything, so maybe i notice or a male has good looks which then because i notice he man it trys and comes across like i fancy that man, hard to ignore thoughts and hard not to question over in your head as ya feel its wrong just to ignore it etc, yet when i say no to thoughts it feels like i am lying etc and feels its not the ocd its just me lyin but why would i keep saying no? no because its not what i want plus i could get another thought in my head which upsets me which could be maybe it is what i want really ... sighhh just annoying i have taken pictures off my replies on here and will be showing them to the doctor, thanks and i am listening even thought i am still going over things in my head its just hard to stop thats all as we all know

[Caramoole]

Just keep trying and applying what you learn.

If it was as easy as just being told whats going on and just being able to stop, none of us would suffer from OCD. OCD is nasty, it's convincing, it's bewildering and very frightening....but it you keep practising a different way of dealing with it, gradually it starts to lessen.

Caramoole

[Guest sigh1]

also hard not to masturbate when ya not with a girl ha, just before i was looking for girl only vids and there was a section of bisexual, shemales and gay yet i had to go over about 10 times, etc no i dont wanna do this and that etc it was hard not to stop also coz i was obviously horny while wanking over girls when i saw these pictures of the sections it was like i had urges like i wanted to look but i think it might of been just because i was horny ? thing is i didnt click on them but it felt like i did, it felt like even though i didnt click on them i still wanted to ? maybe i could have a sex problem? not male or female sex problem but like just getting horny too much ? i dunno, i just want all this to go away i dont want to do anything to a man or a man to do anything to me yet it feels like i do ? also i just feel if i did masturabte over the things i dont want to i know before i started and finished i would know its wrong .... yet saying that without doing it feels like i wouldnt know its wrong ....

Edited August 18, 2013 by sigh1

[Guest OhThatCd]

Sigh. Brother Stop worrying you don't need to question you are making the situation powerful by giving too much attention to it! Listen about those images Its totally cool the type of porn you watch doesn't determine your sexuality. All my life I've been emotionally attracted to girls but sometimes I masturbated to Shemale Porn and Gay porn several times Here is a first time confession from me I did regret it, but there is nothing to regret. Its because of being horny and lust that you are looking for more interesting things its not something to beat yourself up about. If you feel any emotional attraction to males than you are Gay Seeing to males engaging in Sex can make you feel aroused that a normal thing Its sex after all. If that makes me Gay ok Im Gay so what, Yeah Im gay But I wouldn't be interested in a relationship with a Guy nor I felt any attraction to any male I guess my destructive porn habit pushed me to the extremes. I've been only in relationship with girls felt Emotional got In Love got attached to the Girl but attachments bring great suffering thats a totally different subject Loving unconditionally without any expectation to be Love Just Love itself is great the Beloved and The Lover is already within if we can find our twin flame we can expand such Love by Union through to Universe. Nothing Label Brother doing this that etc trying stuff doesn't make you anything even if you involve a sexual intercourse with a man doesn't define your preference. Even though I never felt any attraction to males My HOCD come back recently thoughts like you never given any males a chance? How do you know you are not gay? Is just the thought playing around man! I've been hit by couple of guys It just didn't feel right for me. It's all in your Head Its all In my Head the OCD will debate for years will look reasons tries to convince you etc million times just relax don't pay attention to it. If you want assurance go to a Gay bar try hanging out with one the guys you won't be able to other than "Hey bro what's up man" or seeing as "A friend" stop going on the loop in your Head. Hope this Helps... ~ <3 All my Love and Blessings <3 ~

[Guest sigh1]

no dont think i will go to a gay club that will hardly make anything better mate, i just find it hard to believe that ocd can make you feel its real, if i was to turn gay i would never accept it anyway i would live alone simple as that being with a man is not for me i would rather die even if that is extreme its not what i want simple as that,

i dont know if the feels i get are shocked feelings of the thoughts i put in my head or if they are exciting, yet i crunch my body up thinking of the thoughts and having to over them i feel like crying when i keep going over the thoughts, but if i was gay i wouldnt wanna cry etc everything is just weird up to now

[Guest sigh1]

after seeing the picture of the shemale section, of a man sucking a transexual right now in my head i am going over and over the following - a man sucking a transexual, a man sucking a mans penis, yet i cant move on from them thoughts i have to go over and over again feels like i wanna click it or have urges to click it but havent and wont yet its the feeling inside me thats trying to, the feeling of it being true what i want but i am disagreeing with it saying i dont, now i feel like i am going back to the harming suicidal thread thoughts because i cant win, ye i am being told not to think them but i cant and i cant leave them if they feel they are what i want,

[Guest sigh1]

also when i hear songs its depressing songs like words with the love of my lifeee etc i think of a girl its like thats lost and i cant have it no more because of these thoughts making me feel i want this gay **** ?

[Guest OhThatCd]

Brother Thoughts make it feel real but you are not your thoughts and OCD has Thoughts in it So yeah it makes it all feel real when In reality in doesn't exist. Do you ever feel any attraction to Guys when walking on the street? Here you go another stupid question from me the compulsion will never give you assurance!!! The answer is in "YOUR HEART" Not in Your mind stop trying to define the Heart with Mind is not Possible!!!! Stop the thoughts Listen your Heart the answer won't be a thought it will be in !!!!Silence!!! If you go on with thoughts same thing over over over and over and some times and again over over over again.

[Guest OhThatCd]

You are basically obsessing about it Because it creates distress to you! That's why IT FREAKS YOU OUT! Come on dude please relax. What are you doing Now! Maybe you are thinking of the image or you are thinking about tomorrow or whats there but What about NOW!!!! I am talking about the NOW but its too fast just SIT You don't have to do anything and relax Brother Please. Let Go!. Let go. Man Sucking Man penis whatever dude Let it go Would you Rather enjoy your time listening a song reading a book or you rather obsess about your obsessions. Don't be irritated by it that doesn't mean that you want it Your obsession is very strong because you are VERY against keep it cool Brother. Let go... Let go.... Let go go go go go go ................................

[Guest sigh1]

whenever a male is on the telly or in real life i get thoughts in my head like i may fancie him where i could just be noticing him having good lucks or because this ocd has been haunting me for so long its just natural now for me to have this anxiety and ocd when i see males,

its making me angry now am shouting at the screen put silently as i dont want people to hear me, i am shouting silently and pointing at women saying thats what i want and looking at the gay picture saying thats not what i want yet i have to go over and i am not able to stop right now, people may think i am not listening but i am its just too strong and impossible to stop ... this is too much

[Guest OhThatCd]

Ok Sigh... Im not talking about thoughts tell us about Love does a man make you feel Alive that you want to explore the world with him open up to him fully Do you feel deep Love for him that you want to write poems songs to him That you want to dance? Do you want to grow old with him? Yes or No? NOT ANYTHING SEXUAL!!!! Simply this. Answer and Stop your OCD.

[Guest sigh1]

no but now its playing on my mind thinking of is it what i want which is no but now its in my head, it must be more than ocd i must need medication to help me, i dont wanna do anything with a man nevermind love him mate yet it feels its all a lie, i have doctors monday will show him all the pics i have taken

[Guest OhThatCd]

OCD may say why not Yeah you want that too. How does that make you feel respond with genuine feelings don't respond with Mind mind will trick you!!!!! It WILL!

[Guest sigh1]

even i sometimes say i want a man by mistake then shrugg my head and frown and correct my self sayin i want a girl sometimes when i go over things or stop going over the for awhile

Edited August 18, 2013 by sigh1

[Guest OhThatCd]

Let the waters still Brother you don't have to anything or find out something Just Be.

[Guest sigh1]

what about getting feelings in anus? could be because i feel i need the toilet because i am scared or nervous of the thoughts? also when i feel i get on with men like my team mates on call of duty i get a feeling by my penis? and also an excitement feeling this is because i am getting along with them or having a laugh with them its also the feeling when ya say something right ya have that good feeling, yet i think in my head could be a gay feeling? sighhh

[Guest sigh1]

Let the waters still Brother you don't have to anything or find out something Just Be.

what do you mean? nothing to find out just be ? just be gay? i am not gay nor want to be... its just maybe i keep saying i want girls not men and i just say something wrong so i correct it ...

[Guest OhThatCd]

Dont be Gay or Straight you don't have to be. Just be Here. Enjoy Brother Look at the sky !

[Caramoole]

This conversation isn't helping you Sigh. You don't need to look for genuine feelings or test out theories or any thing else.

You are in the grips of an OCD attack, a vicious anxiety attack and all this soul searching is making it stick on full blown alert.

You say you're a horny young man without a girlfriend but I still feel much of this stuff is a checking compulsion. Try give it a break.

I understand how painful this is right now but you have to change your response... and you can

Is it tomorrow you see your GP?

Caramoole