Douting the doubts doubt by doubting

[machiato]

You are walking along, singing a song, happy as a pig in poo. You think, ocd? what ocd? was I really even worried about anything at all? .... suddenly something spikes you, you worry, you doubt. You try to analyse this thought to prove that nothing bad really happened. You ignore what we know about ocd (dont try to analyse it for a second), because you feel strong enough and certain enough to quickly analyse this thought and in a minute or two, you would have 'solved' this thought..... 4 hours later, you are tired, worried, shaking, dizzy, cant eat, cant sleep and still trying to analyse this thought. Why oh why did I even start to doubt what happened? why did I just jump into that thought pattern. Ok, I should just jump out and apply what I know about OCD. Tell myself that I know nothing happened and just STOP thinking about it RIGHT NOW!.... within a minute, you are analysing again, and doubting that everything is ok. Oh, and you are also doubting that other thing that happened the other day, which you proved was actually ok at the time, but it cant be can it? if this current pattern is now a doubt, then that means that yesterday's must also be a doubt. And what about that other thing that happened 10 years ago? Surely, that must have been wrong too! You are this sick, twisted, vile 'thing', you feel you are. You are not human, you are much, much lower than that.... But it cant be? can it? You must disprove these thoughts!

Now, where was I? I have lost my thinking pattern. Oh yes! I was on that first thought, and I will move across to each and every thought, in turn, to logically disprove them and think my way out of my thoughts, and finally reach the conclusion that you are ok. You will go home, close the door and not talk to anyone for the rest of the evening. An hour or so, should do it. You will prove that everything is ok and you will be fine...... Its now 4am and you are still thinking and doubting that everything is ok. Better get some sleep. Work in the morning. Brain now fried to death and feeling exhausted. Finally nod off and hour before the alarm goes. Get up like a zombie and stutter into work, moody, depressed and beaten. Is this really happening?

Ok, end of story here.......

****!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Does this stuff really go on in our brains on a daily basis? The answer begins by (to quote me ol'mate Legend), recognising that ocd is at play, and regardless of the situation, no matter what, NO MATTER WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCE. Do NOT start that thinking cycle off. Beat it off with a stick from the VERY first millisecond.

Good luck in your fight people. And have an OCD free week.

[Guest Gasspanicc]

it dissolves on its own accord, and diont look for it to dissolve either cause that doesnt help lol.

[ocdismylife]

you just described me. " I will just think about this quickly to prove myself it makes sense" then its gone 8 hours and you are still at the very start. The thing is with me, I know ocd is ocd when there is alot of doubt. What I have problems with is when the thoughts ACTUALLY make some sense in a bad way....a very bad way. You can read my post. You will find it simulair to what you speak about.

Edited September 8, 2013 by ocdismylife

[Caramoole]

You've got to carry on and do the normal things you would have done. Sick to the stomach, shaking, head bursting, anxiety ridden, ready to expire.....but don't recline to the sofa, don't hit google, just keep on doing what you should be doing until it starts to abate. You'll feel battered and bruised but you won't quite break....albeit it feels inevitable.

Eyes forward and keep putting one step in front of the other....you'll wade though

Caramoole

[machiato]

Absolutely agree Caramoole!

OCDismylife - I know what you mean ... as you can see! When you say 'actually makes sense', is why I say 'no matter what', in my first post. Because we have a tendency to seriously freak out, if there is a even a slight logic to it, or slight 'truth'. The reality is that - its ocd! We just dont see it, and the further we dig, the worse it gets.

[Cub]

Hi Mach,

Yeah, I know the feeling (although the first line of your post really made me laugh ) and it's horrible, isn't it? Unfortunately, we can't ever 'stop' the thoughts in their tracks; we can only try and distract ourselves and I know it's hard. The spikes and triggers are awful, and the anxiety hurts, but you are not alone, sweetheart. None of us are, here. :hug:

May I just say your post caused something in me to 'click' so thanks for that.

C x

[ecomum]

I like that "no matter what!" I am going to make a canvas saying that to go with my "sure enough" one.i can see i ve ocd and that past spikes have just been ocd,i can see other peoples are ocd but what if this is the one time its real grrrr gets me everytime!!!

[machiato]

Hi Mach,

Yeah, I know the feeling (although the first line of your post really made me laugh ) and it's horrible, isn't it? Unfortunately, we can't ever 'stop' the thoughts in their tracks; we can only try and distract ourselves and I know it's hard. The spikes and triggers are awful, and the anxiety hurts, but you are not alone, sweetheart. None of us are, here. :hug:

May I just say your post caused something in me to 'click' so thanks for that.

C x

Bless your cotton socks Cubby! You keep your fight too. We can all beat this. And we are NOT what we fear!

I like that "no matter what!" I am going to make a canvas saying that to go with my "sure enough" one.i can see i ve ocd and that past spikes have just been ocd,i can see other peoples are ocd but what if this is the one time its real grrrr gets me everytime!!!

Hey! I trademarked the 'no matter what' - you gota pay me to use it LOL.... those spikes are horrible !

[Lemon]

Your post brought a tear to my eye, it describes me to a t.

When you first spike for that moment it happens so quickly that if you pay attention to it for one second you can be off on the ocd path, you have to be on alert all the time and sometimes it trips you up.

[ocdismylife]

When you all refer to "its ocd" what do you mean by this? Its ocd even though it has a little truth behind it, it isnt true? Or the fact we need to find out is the ocd?

[Guest legend]

Absolutely agree Caramoole!

OCDismylife - I know what you mean ... as you can see! When you say 'actually makes sense', is why I say 'no matter what', in my first post. Because we have a tendency to seriously freak out, if there is a even a slight logic to it, or slight 'truth'. The reality is that - its ocd! We just dont see it, and the further we dig, the worse it gets.

A fantastic mantra. difficult though when you are in the grips of ocd. , but its defintly applicable, and certainly helped me on my

road to recovery

legend

[machiato]

Your post brought a tear to my eye, it describes me to a t.

When you first spike for that moment it happens so quickly that if you pay attention to it for one second you can be off on the ocd path, you have to be on alert all the time and sometimes it trips you up.

Its a stomach churning journey, just by giving it an inch! ... Just over two years ago, I was up from London working in Stoke, at the Sentinel for 3 days, during an OCD meltdown. Would have popped over for an Obsessive Compulsive tea

When you all refer to "its ocd" what do you mean by this? Its ocd even though it has a little truth behind it, it isnt true? Or the fact we need to find out is the ocd?

You probably know that, this is OCD thats making you ask that question .... we just have to avoid asking anything about these issues, as doing so is interacting with them, which is the very thing we are trying not to do.

[Lemon]

Its a stomach churning journey, just by giving it an inch! ... Just over two years ago, I was up from London working in Stoke, at the Sentinel for 3 days, during an OCD meltdown. Would have popped over for an Obsessive Compulsive tea

I know the sentinel Office very well, I pass it often.

You could of called round for a cuppa if Id of known, lol

[machiato]

I know the sentinel Office very well, I pass it often.

You could of called round for a cuppa if Id of known, lol

[Guest Erik197834]

It takes me weeks before I realize it is an ocd thought. Anything that is in line with my theme can be a trigger. How do you recognize it so quickly?

[ecomum]

Yeah .i had spikes before i even knew what ocd was.i always think they could be ocd but what if they are not.

[Guest Mrsp]

Hi Mach,

Yeah, I know the feeling (although the first line of your post really made me laugh )

C x

I just started singing football songs in my head lol