My Dad :S

[Guest 1D_Girl_xoxo]

OK, so I have just been prescribed some Prozep for my OCD and my doctor says he is going to prescribe another medication for me later on if I get on with the Prozep. I was happy with the decision to go ahead with the medication because I am taking all the help I can get! I went to the psychiatrists (i think it was a psychiatrists anyway) to get diagnosed properly with only my mum because my dad was at work at the time, whilst i was there the psychiatrist (or whatever) prescribed me these drugs. A couple of days after I went to the hospital with my mum, she told my dad that i was prescribed some drugs to help. My dad and my mum are divorced and have been for 10 years and don't agree on anything! My dad is the sort of person who doesnt except an opinion unless it is his own and can sometimes think he knows better than the best so he straight away did not like me taking these drugs. he is very against drugs and meds and believes it can all be sorted out through a few counselling sessions. My mum explained to him that she would love for it all to be sorted out with therapy but that wouldnt be the case (because i am struggling quite a bit) but he still strongly objects. Dont get me wrong I love my dad to bits and he has been very supportive throughout the whole process but sometimes it gets a bit too much. I see my dad every other weekend and i would have to take the medicine at his house aswell.

Another thing that i dont like is the fact that my dad and stepmum trivialise ocd, not on purpose but they almost want to make it sound like it doesnt matter like they'll come out with stuff like 'oh yeah i think that too' and 'i have done that before its nothing to get worried about' and just generally wanting to relate to me when i know they can't.

I love them loads but sometimes i cant deal with what they are saying. This is the last thing i want right now and i am trying to avoid conflict with my dad but i need to get my point across but he is very stubborn. Im not sure whether he is trivialising it and objecting to my medication because he doesnt want to admit to himself that i have something wrong or is scared of it idek. All i want is no drama and for him to understand but this is looking quite unlikely. I just want him to realise i have been diagnosed with an actual mental condition instead of me just being silly and exaggerating.

Sorry for the massive rant omg!

Does anyone have any advice on how to take this forward because i am not sure on what to do?? I need heeelllpppp!!!

Thankyou xoxo

[AnxiousLuke]

Hi after reading your post i can relate to how you feel about him not understanding and undermining you and your illness, my advice would be to talk with your mum as she seems to be supportive, I would possibly say if your dad cant do the same it may be worth avoiding him for a bit until you feel stronger as his negativity will only make things worse

maybe if you really need to have contact with him perhaps stay at home but have him visit with your mum present so you feel supported

thats only my opinion though

hope that helps, hope you feel better soon

Luke

[Guest 1D_Girl_xoxo]

Hi Luke :original:

Thanks for your advice it's really refreshing to have an alternate perspective since opinions off my mum or dad are usually a little biased although not on purpose!

I think you might be right and I will try and have a conversation with him soon alongside my mum. Its nice to know someone can relate.

Thanks for your help, take care

[carolj]

Hi, Im a parent with a son with OCD and sometimes it just easier to bury our heads in the sand and try and pretend nothing is wrong. I understand your Dad being worried about medication, afterall we all love our children so much and the thought of them being on medication at whatever age they are, is hard to bear. We usually have this unwarranted feeling of guilt, that we could have done something to avoid this happening, which just isnt true.

Can I suggest you show your father this parents guide

http://www.ocduk.org/sites/default/files/parents-booklet.pdf

It might really help him to understand how distressing OCD is and that unfortunately counselling just isnt effective. I do hope the psychiatrist is arranging CBT for you, as this should go hand in hand with medication?

Dont give up on him, he just needs a little help and Im sure your Mum can do that.

Carol

[AnxiousLuke]

Hi Luke :original:

Thanks for your advice it's really refreshing to have an alternate perspective since opinions off my mum or dad are usually a little biased although not on purpose!

I think you might be right and I will try and have a conversation with him soon alongside my mum. Its nice to know someone can relate.

Thanks for your help, take care

Your welcome, im glad you found my advice useful, if you ever need anyone to talk to feel free to drop me a message and il reply when I can,

I hope your dad does come around and realize that your trying to battle your condition and his support would make a difference

hope theres some progress soon

Take care

Luke :original:

[Guest 1D_Girl_xoxo]

Thankyou for the link and advise Carol, I might just give that to him, it might help him understand a little bit more at the very least :original:

Yes I am having CBT alongside the medication. I think my dad does feel guilty because he keeps telling me that it's his and my mums fault for my OCD which i know is not true and I dont want them to feel that way!

And thanks again Luke, I really appreciate it :original:

[AnxiousLuke]

Hi 1D_Gir_XOXO l hope your well and coping ok, just wondered if there had been any progress with your dad?

[Guest 1D_Girl_xoxo]

Hi Luke,

I have spoken to him multiple times since we told him I was on medication and he seems to be getting used to the fact that I am not going to come off it although he is still not budging on his stance against it. He wanted to ask more questions so we booked a doctors appt with me, my mum and him and even after the doctor speaking to him he is still not convinced and he made it very clear he was not happy.

At least he accepts it now and that is a step forward... but I don't like the pressure he is putting me under to go his way.

I don't think I can do much more though ill just have to wait and see if the meds work

Thanks for asking though

How are you?

[AnxiousLuke]

Hi 1D_Girl_xoxo, (sorry I don't know your name lol),

at least you have tried to resolve the issue, he seems very stubborn, if he is putting you under unneeded pressure it might be worth putting some distance between you, as the added pressure will only add to your symptoms, you need to do what you feel best and support you,

your obviously a very bright and switched on young lady so i have every faith that you can beat this

I'm ok a bit anxious about a hospital appointment tomorrow but got therapy later so hopefully feel better after that :-)

Luke

[Guest LissyR]

Heyy,

Sounds like Life is really tough right now, but I'm glad you're getting help!

If you don't want to say it to him but want him to understand try writing it down? Leave it somewhere he'll see it, and don't be with him when he does so he has time to think before he answers. Or e-mail him. That way he should see how you're really feeling and understand that this is honestly whats best for you!

You never know it might even bring you closer together if you feel like you can talk to each other, because what is more personal and embarrassing than having to explain whats going on in your head?

Here anytime you need to talk

Hope it goes well,

Lissy xx

[Guest 1D_Girl_xoxo]

Hi Luke haha,

Thankyou for your advice, and I will try my best to beat this for definite!!

I hope your hospital appointment and therapy went well and that your ok

And thankyou Lissy, it would certainly be easier to talk to him through an email so I might try that one

Thanks to you both!

xx