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Afraid Of My Own Bodys "Germs"


Guest Interdimensional

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Guest Interdimensional

When i was ten years old, I was so convinced I was dirty that I had to shower before I slept in my own bed. But, showering was such a long, drawn out experience each time that most nights, I'd sleep on a mattress in my parents room.

Years later, I'm finally sleeping in my own bed. Showering is easier now - I have little to no routines.

Thing is, I still have a problem with my body. And i'm at an age now where, to put it delicately, i generally have someone else's body in my bed, too.

My girlfriend of almost a year is awesome and supportive when it comes to my OCD, but come on, how sexy is it when I have to get up and shower after sex, change the bed sheets, lysol the room, make her take a shower, brush my teeth.. .etc.

I have no concept of what is normal after sex, and I'm too ashamed to really talk to my girlfriend about it... I feel bad enough making her think that I think she's dirty (she has her own issues and it can take a toll)

Is it normal to want to wash your hands? Like, is it okay to touch stuff without it? I've been in an OCD group for quite some time and while it's made leaps and bounds of progress in other areas, I'm not comfortable discussing intimacy with everyone, so this is my best bet.

When I watch movies people are totally unflinching after sex, they just sort of go about their business. At some point I figure it was just hammered into my head that sex was dirty and now it makes me feel contaminated. Does anyone have any thoughts or are they able to put this into perspective for me? I have no one I can really talk to at this point.

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i have issues with not knowing whats normal because my mum had extreme ocd.so my therapist made an anonymous survey asking people what they would do to give me a grounding of what is normal.try small steps and cutting down on the washing gradually.also do erp by imagining doing it and not washing.then you will see it wont be so bad.i did this for things i was worried about and am much better now.

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Guest Interdimensional

it's awful. I don't know what to do. I managed to deal with her sleeping naked last night, without doing anything, and i'm feeling really anxious but it's bearable. I can be okay with skin and stuff, but i think for me the cincher is body fluids.

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It's a bit like all matters of hygiene, everyone's different. Some people (without OCD) wash their hands frequently, others not so. So there isn't really a "normal" as such. It's the same with sex, some people can roll over and go to sleep, some might have wet wipes handy, others might nip to the bathroom.

how sexy is it when I have to get up and shower after sex, change the bed sheets, lysol the room, make her take a shower, brush my teeth.. .etc.

It isn't sexy at all :( There should be no way you should be asking your girlfriend to take a shower and no way she should be doing so (unless it's something she herself wanted to do [not because you're asking her]) No need to Lysol the room. no need to change the sheets. Whether you took a shower and cleaned your teeth is generally more of a personal thing (and most people probably don't) but in your instance....it's definitely more of an OCD thing rather than a general choice.

Providing there are no sexual health problems, for non-ocd-ers hygiene is a personal choice. Your choices sound to be OCD driven, perhaps it's something you could discuss with your girlfriend as to what she'd "Like" to do from her point of view and what changes you could work towards that are a little less obsessive.

Caramoole :)

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When I do have sex with my hubby its fine and afterwards I just go to the loo...... but with me it can take weeks, months before I want to do anything like that! Once I do it I think to myself why did I wait so long :( but it all boils down to ocd and that sex is dirty :( which it isnt its normal, but when you've had it said over snd over again its hard to think of sex as a positive and more a negative.

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