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Does anyone feel like they can't have a good time?


Guest BlondeMermaidxoxo

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Guest BlondeMermaidxoxo

Hello friends! How was your Christmas? I hope everyone had a wonderful time with their loved ones!

I am having a hard time right now. I realized that I can never have a very good time whenever I know I should. For example I'm on my way to Las Vegas to see Britney Spears and I should be overly excited but instead I'm anxious and depressed and I have no idea why. I have looked up to her my whole life! So why do I feel this way? :( it happens every time I should be very excited. Instead I get depressed and anxious, maybe it's because I want things to go perfect or "right" as I would say. I know I will be expecting things to feel a certain way and be a certain way. I just want to be able to have a good time and be super excited like my old self used to be. Why does my ocd have to ruin things for me? :( I feel like a zombie. I'm getting so angry!

-BMxo

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Guest itsnotmeitsmyocd

Hiya sweet heart

Firstly your doing amazing, going to the concert is a massive achievement isn't it. :original:

I think your having a back door spike hun, as in "i should be jumping with joy and excited etc" if you can treat it exactly as you would treat an intrusive thought/rumination. Try to treat the "I should" exactly a you treat the "what if's" Let it be there, accept okay right now i am feeling anxious and low, this is a by product of ocd and it will pass.

OCD has a horrid way of attacking things we enjoy, but the more you tell it to sod off and continue doing what ever you want to do regardless the quicker it will learn it cant take hold of you.

Keep it up Mermaid, I bet once your at the concert you will have an amazing time :original:

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Ah! I felt exactly like this. This, actually was my first experience with OCD type feelings.

I went somewhere that I was really really excited about, but for some reason I was anxious the whole way through. I guess I wanted it to be perfect. I had a great time but for months after I kept thinking: "Did I really enjoy it?" and I questioned myself so much and made myself feel sick over a simple thing, very strange, but I understand completely how you feel.

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I'm the same with everything !!!!! It's horrible we cant enjoy anything, it is because we want everything to be perfect and by the time we've messed about trying to get everything just right, it's too late to enjoy !!!!! X

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I'm the same with everything !!!!! It's horrible we cant enjoy anything, it is because we want everything to be perfect and by the time we've messed about trying to get everything just right, it's too late to enjoy !!!!! X

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i feel like this ,like if im happy ive got more to loose.the only thing i found helps is to stick at it and dont stop doing things and slowly but surely genuine enjoment returns.enjoy britney my husband will be well jealous ;-)

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Yes and I think the same is true for many depressive illnesses. It's almost like time is passing you by and you just can't make that break to turn your life around. I've been stuck like this now for about 7 years and it's so frustrating and I just muddle through each day making the most of what I have.

I take pleasure in the little things that life delivers and I try not to worry about where my life is heading, this is probably the wrong thing to do but If i worry about my life too much then I get no enjoyment at all.

I love my wife, my kids and my dog and i just try and get through each day. It might be walking the dog, playing with my kids etc while the rest of my time is like a complete fog....at least I had something enjoyable from my day.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest BlondeMermaidxoxo

Hiya sweet heart

Firstly your doing amazing, going to the concert is a massive achievement isn't it. :original:

I think your having a back door spike hun, as in "i should be jumping with joy and excited etc" if you can treat it exactly as you would treat an intrusive thought/rumination. Try to treat the "I should" exactly a you treat the "what if's" Let it be there, accept okay right now i am feeling anxious and low, this is a by product of ocd and it will pass.

OCD has a horrid way of attacking things we enjoy, but the more you tell it to sod off and continue doing what ever you want to do regardless the quicker it will learn it cant take hold of you.

Keep it up Mermaid, I bet once your at the concert you will have an amazing time :original:

Hello! :) I have missed chatting with you! I hope everything is going well! I followed your advice and it did help. I was a little anxious but not as much as I thought I would. I did have a huge breakdown the night I got to Vegas. I went into the bathroom and cried at a restaurant. It was very embarrassing but I guess it happens..lol :/ I have told myself that OCD just attacks what I love. I hate that it does that but reminding myself thats all its trying to do is helpful. It was a lot of fun and Im so glad I didn't let my OCD win while I was there. xo

Ah! I felt exactly like this. This, actually was my first experience with OCD type feelings.

I went somewhere that I was really really excited about, but for some reason I was anxious the whole way through. I guess I wanted it to be perfect. I had a great time but for months after I kept thinking: "Did I really enjoy it?" and I questioned myself so much and made myself feel sick over a simple thing, very strange, but I understand completely how you feel.

Im glad I am not alone! Thank you for your reply.

I'm the same with everything !!!!! It's horrible we cant enjoy anything, it is because we want everything to be perfect and by the time we've messed about trying to get everything just right, it's too late to enjoy !!!!! X

Yes exactly! Its very hard but like itsnotme said, we have to just see it like it is, OCD. I hope you

i feel like this ,like if im happy ive got more to loose.the only thing i found helps is to stick at it and dont stop doing things and slowly but surely genuine enjoment returns.enjoy britney my husband will be well jealous ;-)

Thank you so much. I tried my best and it did help. Britney was great! :)

Yes and I think the same is true for many depressive illnesses. It's almost like time is passing you by and you just can't make that break to turn your life around. I've been stuck like this now for about 7 years and it's so frustrating and I just muddle through each day making the most of what I have.

I take pleasure in the little things that life delivers and I try not to worry about where my life is heading, this is probably the wrong thing to do but If i worry about my life too much then I get no enjoyment at all.

I love my wife, my kids and my dog and i just try and get through each day. It might be walking the dog, playing with my kids etc while the rest of my time is like a complete fog....at least I had something enjoyable from my day.

I agree with everything you said. Im so glad I am not alone in this. I do try to do little things as well. I love what you said about your dog. My dog is a huge help with my OCD. She almost works as a therapy dog for me. I think its important we do all the little things we enjoy. I hope you're doing well.

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I know exactly how you feel. I've managed to ruin my last 2 or 3 Christmases trying to make sure everything is "perfect" and I'm not worrying about stuff.

OCD grabs hold of everything you enjoy and tries to destroy it. I think it's an underlying feeling of low self esteem and "I don't deserve happiness" which makes this happen.

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Guest Standinginline

Know exactly what you mean. At the moment everything is going amazingly well but my mind won't let me just be happy. Daily I deal with anxiety ,not majorly ,just that butterfly feeling in your belly and my mind constantly searching for something to reason why I feel like this. Nonetheless ,it's unsettling. At the moment ,if I feel remotely I instantly feel guilty. Tbh ,think probably more GAD nowadays than OCD.

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Yeah, I can relate.

Sometimes I'm scared to have fun because I worry about the consequences after.

Other times I can't find the enthusiasm. I was asked to join a band. I'm interested, but not over the moon like I should be. I haven't even bought the gear that I need. Or, for that matter, I haven't cleaned my apartment to put the gear in. Everything seems overwhelming and I think whatever I do I'll probably ruin it or find something wrong with it anyway.

So, I take little steps. Planning for the future seems moot. I try to see the good in little things. Unfortunately, while I see them others make comments that leave me feeling so discouraged. I feel like no little step is enough, even though I feel proud of it initially.

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Guest stencil

Yes. I tend to think when I'm having a good time, something tells me I shouldn't, because I shouldn't think everything will be OK. It's almost as if if I don't worry about something it WILL happen.

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I've definitely had times like that in my struggles with OCD. Even something as simple as going to a movie, or hanging out with friends can become overwhelmed by my OCD anxiety. Part of the problem I think is that anticipation and excitement can feel a LOT like anxiety. Similar physical sensations (heart racing, etc.) so your brain gets confused. I've found that most of the time the anxiety is worst before whatever it is but once I actually GO to the event or do the activity the worry starts to fade and I start to enjoy myself. Sometimes, especially if i'm in an OCD rut, its still not as much fun as I wish it were, but its at least more fun than doing nothing would have been AND I feel like its a good step forward.

I hope actually being at the concert will be enjoyable for you and that you can have a positive experience and focus on the victories you are achieving along the way!

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Guest stencil

Yes, I think there's a lot of truth in that. Because of how we are, we focus so much on what went wrong or what could go wrong, it's helpful to focus on what you did right, sometimes more went right than you thought.

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I get a similar OCD spike where I wonder whether I'm having the 'right' emotions while listening to music to see if I'm enjoying it enough or watching a film and then worrying that I've picked the wrong one and that I'm not enjoying my free time as much as I could.

I felt better when I recognised this and learned to accept that whatever I was doing was probably 'wrong' but to keep on doing it.

Chris

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Guest hollyrose92

i know how you feel the anxiety off doing something almost out ways the enjoyment of doing things so it

seem pointless but i have found just doing stuff definitely pays off in the end its just getting over the dread!

Edited by hollyrose92
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