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I dont want to live anymore.


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I cant go on no more. I just cant. My thoughts are beyond disgusting and my body does not react anymore its like I dont care. I have totally lost myself. My thoughts seem so real thst they make me think im a monster. Still no anxiety. I dont know how im gonna see out another day of being this depressed and confused. I keep writing on here to vent but nothin is working. I feel disgusted in myself for thinking such things then doubting who I am. I just want to go sleep and not wake up for a while.

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Guest AnnieX

Sometimes I wish they could just put me to sleep , then wake me up and I'll be free of this.

There is no shame in not feeling anxious about your thoughts - it's just become routine . You should see it as a positive . I don't like my thoughts but I'm not anxious so I will ignore the fact I've had them.

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Guest BlondeMermaidxoxo

Hello! I used to feel the way you're feeling very often. I want you to know, it gets better. You just have to tell yourself that its just the OCD. I got through this and I know you can too.

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I know they are just thoughts and they are silly but when my anxiety is high ocd convinces me im capable and now I cant forgive myself for feeling this way. I feel totally dead. I dont wanna carry on.

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Guest LuckyCat

I can identify. I have been so low the past couple of weeks. Laying in bed all day. Awake all night. The medication takes away the anxiety but surely that is a good thing? Although I know it can make you feel a bit empty. The fact that you don't react with anxiety now is a positive rather than a negative thing. The next step is to just not engage with the thoughts at all. I am still feeling rubbish but today I am going to have a shower, make myself look presentable and get out the house. Sometimes it helps to do something different and pretend everything is fine even when it isn't. Hopefully your mind/body then starts to see that things aren't so bad. It is meant to be nice weather today (UK) can you go for a walk? Or sit in the garden? Hope this helps. X

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Guest LuckyCat

Sorry I forgot to say that not wanting to live anymore does not mean that you want to die, only that you want your situation/life to change dramatically for the better and as BlondeMermaid said it can.

I feel better already knowing I am going to try and do something different today than just laying in bed, so try small steps just for the time being and be kind to yourself.

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