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How is not reacting to anxiety supposed to help!


Guest The fighter

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Hi fighter,

Please can you break done simply for everyone what it is that you do and how the functions in your role generate the anxiety? Break the post up into paragraphs using the return key to make it even simpler to digest.

The boys and girls can then take a look and see - I suspect it's because its work-related and you need to make some behavioural changes or the anxiety-inducing situation doesn't change. Maybe your employer will need to buy into this too - under employment legislation they have statutory responsibilities if an employee gets work-related stress or has a disability like OCD which affects how they work and where reasonable adjustments would enable the employee carry out his work comfortably and healthily.

Anxiety normally reduces where dealing with thought intrusions or carrying out compulsions and a graded hierarchy of exposure is worked through.

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Guest Danielle1308

Hey fighter, I have the same situation, but I still manage to avoid it. In my situation, my ocd "trigger" is mainly water and soap. Really odd, but isn't ocd in general. So going to the bathroom is a real issue. So is showering. Showers take hours. I avoid them by (I know it's gross) taking only 2-3 a week. I've trained my bladder to only use the bathroom twice a day. But I know your situation is still different, because I guess you can't avoid it. Like you, my anxiety gets worse as time goes on. It doesn't reduce like people say. It would be helpful if I knew what you were faced with all the time. My advice is, write it down in a journal. It helps. Also, maybe you could try having a "worry period" during the day where you take maybe 5 minutes and ritualize and then stop when that time is up

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Guest Danielle1308

Hey fighter, I have the same situation, but I still manage to avoid it. In my situation, my ocd "trigger" is mainly water and soap. Really odd, but isn't ocd in general. So going to the bathroom is a real issue. So is showering. Showers take hours. I avoid them by (I know it's gross) taking only 2-3 a week. I've trained my bladder to only use the bathroom twice a day. But I know your situation is still different, because I guess you can't avoid it. Like you, my anxiety gets worse as time goes on. It doesn't reduce like people say. It would be helpful if I knew what you were faced with all the time. My advice is, write it down in a journal. It helps. Also, maybe you could try having a "worry period" during the day where you take maybe 5 minutes and ritualize and then stop when that time is up

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Have you tried changing your thoughts during exposure? If you're exposed to a feared situation but the whole time you're thinking 'oh my god this is so bad, x will happen, y could go wrong, I hate this, etc etc' then you're just reinforcing your fears. For example I hate flying but I don't avoid flying because I want to go on holiday. But all through the flight I'm thinking 'OMG we're going down, this flights gonna crash, I'm going to die today etc etc'. And so I never get over the fear, I still associate flying with fear. This is why you need CBT alongside your exposure.

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Have you tried changing your thoughts during exposure? If you're exposed to a feared situation but the whole time you're thinking 'oh my god this is so bad, x will happen, y could go wrong, I hate this, etc etc' then you're just reinforcing your fears. For example I hate flying but I don't avoid flying because I want to go on holiday. But all through the flight I'm thinking 'OMG we're going down, this flights gonna crash, I'm going to die today etc etc'. And so I never get over the fear, I still associate flying with fear. This is why you need CBT alongside your exposure.

I was told at a specialist unit that no amount of exposure will work if we just 'grit our teeth and bear it', so I do agree with Franklin. The problem for me is that I haven't found changing my thinking helps either.

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Guest The fighter

I'm just all over the place at the moment.

It's so tiring and I don't even want to even explain just in case someone I know sees it and know it's me.

See how silly is that.

Maybe all I can do is grin and bare it.

That paragraph above just shows how silly i take things.

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I think you are safe here to speak openly. If you use the name The Fighter on other sites and are worried people will know who you are, why don't you change it? I'm guessing, though, that you are worried your circumstances will be recognized and someone will then know who you are. If that's the case, can't you just word it carefully.

Maybe others have experienced what you're going through and can help.

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Guest The fighter

Thanks tricia :) thanks taurean Danielle and franklin too!!

So basically everyday at work I have to do a certain Daily procedure. Which helps get rid of stock and benefits the customers.

now the policy at work state noone should benefit from this procedure only during break time and not in the companies time.

I've seen it happen before and I just don't want to be put in a situation where I have to tell someone of their wrong doings. Even though they might ignore me and do it anyway.

so there it is

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I was told at a specialist unit that no amount of exposure will work if we just 'grit our teeth and bear it', so I do agree with Franklin. The problem for me is that I haven't found changing my thinking helps either.

Hey I was just reading this thread. When I'm doing ERP, let's say not going to wash my hands, should I avoid doing mental rituals as I'm feeling the anxiety? Like, "Well I would have washed my hands between X and Y," and, "Knowing me, I would have washed it at least once." Should I try to not go through those thought processes as I'm doing the exposure? The thoughts are very close to automatic, but maybe I can stop myself from getting too far on the thought train if that's how it's supposed to be done.

I just got confused reading this thread. Am I supposed to just feel the anxiety and try not to get involved in any mental rationalizing about why it's not really worth worrying about?

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Hi fighter,

We all have different OCD and anxiety hang-ups and what bugs me doesn't bug you. and when we find people here with a similar sort of issue, it's never exactly the same, nor would it affect individuals exactly the same way.

And some people are extremely stress hardy - others like me are minimal stress tolerant.

In my job as an insurance broker there were very rigid rules - both the from the company itself, the regulator, and my professional body, where I held high qualifications, set extremely high professional and ethical standards for me to follow.

My team colleagues had to follow the first two, but not the last as they were not members of the professional body.

Occasionally I might catch them not observing say regulatory rules as they should be observed. I would remind them at the time and propose the correct procedure - they would listen as they knew I was right and the penalties for non-compliance are quite significant so I was helping them.

My popularity within the team increased as it was clear I was helping them avoid non-compliance issues and penalties, and the boss asked me to officially become the team's compliance champion.

Ok so the compliance was a driver for them, but I have no doubt at all that if it was just the company rules they would still have listened and they would still have appreciated my guidance and advice - I did do this a number of times on company rules, and may have saved people from having to address any internal disciplinary issues because of my intervention.

Why not raise the non-compliances in your next team meeting, and that it would be sensible if everyone noted the correct procedure and carried it out? This would reflect well on the team and its members, and avoid any internal problems?

Or just take your issue to the manager individually? As I said, if it is causing you stress and its work-related, companies have a duty of care to their staff to address it and he should know that.

If its more an OCD issue, tell us more and we will look to help you.

I do suspect your anxiety levels aren't falling because nothing is being done to address the source of your anxiety.

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Guest livia1973

Hello,

I am new to this site, have just registered to this forum today and don't know whether it is a good place to ask my questions. I am in a relationship with a man who suffers OCD, he told me about it after about two years together(more precisely meeting every one or two months)...after we got closer I think he got scared and sabotaged our relationship....I really don't know what to do..his confession did not change anything in my feelings towards him..I don't want to lose him but it's very hard for me because I have a fear of rejection myself but I am working on it very hard..

Is there anyone who suffers OCD and would like to talk to me, help me to understand it a bit more the other person?I would be very grateful..:-)

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Guest Danielle1308

Have you tried changing your thoughts during exposure? If you're exposed to a feared situation but the whole time you're thinking 'oh my god this is so bad, x will happen, y could go wrong, I hate this, etc etc' then you're just reinforcing your fears. For example I hate flying but I don't avoid flying because I want to go on holiday. But all through the flight I'm thinking 'OMG we're going down, this flights gonna crash, I'm going to die today etc etc'. And so I never get over the fear, I still associate flying with fear. This is why you need CBT alongside your exposure.

I believe this is so true. For example, I have fears that people are contaminated and if I touch them I will be too. You have to say "maybe I will be contaminated" you have to live with the fact that it could happen. Embrace the doubts. "Maybe I will kill my parents, maybe I will hurt my best friend." But you won't, and you have to believe that
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