Caramoole Posted May 31, 2015 Share Posted May 31, 2015 I have just hurt my arm cos my husband is hurting me by not talking to me In real terms, hows that going to help you Joanne? Link to comment
joanne123 Posted May 31, 2015 Author Share Posted May 31, 2015 because it makes me feel the pain I feel on the inside and it makes me feel lonely Link to comment
Handy Posted May 31, 2015 Share Posted May 31, 2015 What is the best wine for ocd joanne, a white or a red? Link to comment
joanne123 Posted May 31, 2015 Author Share Posted May 31, 2015 Why do you ask I mean I know neither but I have been doing it to cope I have to sope drinking and smoking now as I have been doing both all day and have been told I have a problem with my heart I really need help with my ocd or I am not sure what will happen I don`t want to not be here but I want the pain of the ocd to not be here and not sure if I can cope with fighting it Link to comment
daisy Posted May 31, 2015 Share Posted May 31, 2015 Handy if that was meant to be a joke then I really feel it was in very poor taste! Joanne is not only battling with her ocd she also has MS as well to cope with,I really can't see how asking that question is meant to help her! Link to comment
joanne123 Posted May 31, 2015 Author Share Posted May 31, 2015 Me either especially as I was took in hospital Friday for trouble with my heart as they said it is not working right and I have only been drinking and smoking to try and numb the pain as I can`t get any help it was a stupid thing to say really as I am in so much pain right now I don`t know what else to do as no one will give me the help I need Link to comment
daisy Posted May 31, 2015 Share Posted May 31, 2015 Sorry to hear about your heart Joanne,did you mention it at the hospital about not receiving any help for your OCD? I just wondered if they could help x Link to comment
joanne123 Posted May 31, 2015 Author Share Posted May 31, 2015 (edited) Thanks I did mention it but as usual they said there was nothing they can do x Edited May 31, 2015 by joanne123 Link to comment
Lost_in_a_Dark_Maze Posted May 31, 2015 Share Posted May 31, 2015 Oh, Joanne. :hug: As much as is possible, I understand. I know how the feelings of deep anguish, fear, despair, hopelessness, helplessness, guilt and self-loathing can lead to self harming. Of course it is not the answer, but we're not thinking rationally when we do it. Please take care of the cuts on your arm. How bad are they? I hope things have calmed down a bit between you and your husband. Give him some space and remember that he's only human too. People often say things when they're stressed, angry or frustrated that they don't really mean. I expect he's very worried about you and feeling powerless to do anything, which is coming out as misplaced anger towards you. You are not well, and you are not to blame for that. I know it hurts to be criticised for not getting better though - I am sure you do not want to remain suffering! Link to comment
joanne123 Posted May 31, 2015 Author Share Posted May 31, 2015 Thank you they are not to bad but it hurts enough and is lonely having ocd without him not talking to me. He has just said I need to start making more effort but it is bloody hard and don`t know if I can do it as I think I must be too weak. I know he wants to see me better that is why he gets mad when I phone people for reassurance but at the time I am not sure what else to do. I don`t know how else to cope I think I need some better help or something cos I just don`t think I can fight this on my own I feel powerless to stop it and I am so depressed and my ms means I don`t get out much cos my legs are weak so I am very lonely and scared all the time and don`t see a way out Link to comment
Caramoole Posted May 31, 2015 Share Posted May 31, 2015 He has just said I need to start making more effort but it is bloody hard and don`t know if I can do it as I think I must be too weak. I know he wants to see me better that is why he gets mad when I phone people for reassurance but at the time I am not sure what else to do. But in a way he's right You can't make improvement by dealing with it the way you are doing by compulsions, self-harm, drinking. You have to try and resist and work on the reassurance seeking and relying on outside help, rather than from within. I know it isn't easy, everyone here knows that.....but we often hear "But I'm not strong enough"........strength is like a muscle and it has to be built, but you have to start somewhere......otherwise you imprison yourself to being back here every couple of hours asking the same question. There will be critics who will think how awful I am for even saying that......I don't mind that, so be it...because I want you to get that cog to click into place and to do your best to fight this, to develop that muscle so that you can improve, not stay stuck for the next couple of years by doing the very things that are keeping you where you are. Link to comment
joanne123 Posted May 31, 2015 Author Share Posted May 31, 2015 Thank you I know he and you and everyone who say not to ask anyone is right I just can`t seem to stop doing it as it makes me feel so ill and I don`t know how to cope with the worry and anxiety Link to comment
PolarBear Posted May 31, 2015 Share Posted May 31, 2015 You cope with the worry and anxiety by accepting it and not doing anything about it. Just leave it alone. It will be there, it will bother you, but it can't hurt you. It goes away on its own. That's what you need to learn. I agree with Caramoole. You keep saying you need more help, extra help, better help, and while it would be great for you to have a good therapist to help guide you through recovery, at the end of the day you would still have to do the work yourself. Therapists don't make you better. They give you the tools you need but you have to do the work. You can start right now, today, by working on your biggest compulsion, reassurance seeking. You can force yourself to stop asking for it. Yes that will make you anxious. Your brain will demand you get reassurance, but you can resist. And any therapist worth her weight would tell you the same thing. Link to comment
Handy Posted June 1, 2015 Share Posted June 1, 2015 daisy, she mentioned in the topic that she drinks wine for her ocd. So, since I cant reassure her then just gonna have to ask her other questions. Also, Joanne, I would prefer you take a bath than cut yourself if it comes to that sort of choice. Link to comment
ACE Posted June 1, 2015 Share Posted June 1, 2015 Why do you ask I mean I know neither but I have been doing it to cope I have to sope drinking and smoking now as I have been doing both all day and have been told I have a problem with my heart I really need help with my ocd or I am not sure what will happen I don`t want to not be here but I want the pain of the ocd to not be here and not sure if I can cope with fighting it Hey there Jo I'm really sorry to hear how you've been feeling& about the cutting as well hun,I know how tough it is I used to drink quite excessively as well.Have you ever been hospitalized for your OCD? Link to comment
joanne123 Posted June 1, 2015 Author Share Posted June 1, 2015 Thank you no I have never been put in hospital due to my ocd Link to comment
joanne123 Posted June 1, 2015 Author Share Posted June 1, 2015 PLEASE HELP SOMEONE I DON`T KNOW HOW TO DO THIS I WANT TO GO TO A SPECIALIST HOSPITAL FOR TREATMENT I CAN`T STOP CRYING MY GIRLS NEED THEIR MOM BETTER PLEASE SOMEONE Link to comment
ACE Posted June 1, 2015 Share Posted June 1, 2015 Hey there Jo are you able to go to your GP ASAP & ask to be admitted or get some details about a specialist hospital? :original: . Link to comment
Guest Tricia Posted June 1, 2015 Share Posted June 1, 2015 What is the best wine for ocd joanne, a white or a red? How unkind and sarcastic... Joanne, there must be more help available to you. I know it should just be offered and not a case of your having to fight for it, but it is your right to have specialist treatment. What suggestion has the charity had? Would you be able to receive inpatient if it were offered? I am so very sorry to hear you've cut yourself. I used to do that and I do fully understand how our OCD can drive us to it. Many here empathize and have done similar. Link to comment
Caramoole Posted June 1, 2015 Share Posted June 1, 2015 I believe Ashley is speaking with you Joanne. Have you responded to his latest PM? Link to comment
Ashley Posted June 1, 2015 Share Posted June 1, 2015 Re: the last couple of posts on the thread, yep to both, I am dealing with communication this morning Link to comment
joanne123 Posted June 1, 2015 Author Share Posted June 1, 2015 Yes thanks I have replied Link to comment
tia Posted June 1, 2015 Share Posted June 1, 2015 Hello, have you contacted your local MS branch as they can be very helpful and understanding about your MS. They have get togethers and I am sure someone would be able to give you a lift there. They can give you latest information and advice on all sorts of things. Perhaps at the moment you are too tense and upset to go but it would be so good if you could contact them. I know you can get medication to help with some bowel problems, I know someone who takes medication then goes an hour later which helps with their MS. Alcohol will upset your bowels and MS and your feelings of despair. Take care. Link to comment
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