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CBT question about changes to how ocd operates


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Hi there,

I've been having High Intensity CBT for a while now and have a good therapist. I do plan to ask him about this too. I have quite a few different types of ocd which can make tackling them quite a challenge. For some time now I've become aware that ocd seems to change shape as you tackle it. I'm finding if I am succeeding at beating it in one way it seems to tweak itself and present itself slightly differently so I have to constantly adapt myself to fighting it. It's a bit like a manipulative person when they don't succeed at conquering you one way they re-word things and try something else until you are back under their control. I am finding this frustrating because it feels like the goal posts keep moving and almost as if the ocd has some sentience of its own. It really does seem like the ocd is self-aware and is doing everything it can to stay alive.

Does anyone have any experience of this? If I continue with the CBT (which I def plan to do and I am determined to keep fighting the ocd) does this constant tweaking of the ocd eventually stop or settle down? I am looking out for covert compulsions and am trying to make sure that I am aware of any new compulsions that may come in as I ditch the older ones but am finding the ocd still changes its presentation as I fight it.

I'd appreciate any thoughts or experience anyone can share about this.

Thank you,

Sara

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Hi Sara,

Sounds like you are doing really well with your recovery. Yes its quite common for this sort of thing to happen. You say you are looking out for covert compulsions too - thats really good!

Once you are further down the line you will most likely feel its attacking you less and less. They are all just thoughts though and intrusive thoughts are normal brain function. You will always be slightly more suseptible to OCD trying to claw its way back in. But keep doing what u are doing and I'm sure you'll do great x

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I love the imaginative idea OCD could be self-aware and doing everything it can to stay alive. Sure can seem that way sometimes! :)

Right little magical monster that OCD...

I think when you first try to kill the monster it is a bit like engaging swords with a shapechanger. It evolves, steps sideways rather than give up, oozes back in through every chink in your armour, and plays unfairly using every dirty trick it can think of.

But as time goes by and you become more expert at fighting back it morphs a lot less. Probably because you get better at recognising it no matter what form it takes so it's no longer able to sneak up on you and get a hold.

Keep going! It's only a matter of time and practise until the new brain pathways of thinking and acting normally grow back and get stronger than the OCD ones.

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Hi Sara,

This transience of OCD from one subject to the other or one tact or to other has been a huge problem for me too. I would think that it's quite common in peeps with OCD generally. I'm sure that your Therapist provides a wide approach to tackling your OCD so that it becomes less defined by what tends to be your particular worry or in the way it chooses to manifest itself. I'm hoping to get some therapeutic help again soon (previously, I wasn't too keen) and this is a must really and I believe that is partly why CBT works so much better than other therapies, because it can be applied in any instance with any concern.

I also struggle with defining compulsions and especially when to know when I might be seeking re-assurance and just generally knowing what I should be concerned with (I don't believe that worrying is ever helpful, although I still do it). However, I've managed to quell a great deal of intrusion and some of the more insidious thoughts with meds (after ten years of trying with medications and making myself very ill I should say). So, I can only imagine that CBT and similar treatments as well as more attention to diet and exercise and more acting my age (instead either acting like a child or an old man) will see me improve further and Therapy and the right amount of positive self-observance. And I have come to accept that CBT is the really the only plausible way to tackle the root cause of my OCD, I'm sure that you've heard the old adage about the plant and watering it and all that Jazz, so you understand. I wish you all the best and I really hope that we can both strive for a peaceful mind which should, in turn, lead to more pleasurable lives!

Happy New Year Sara.

TTG,

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Thank you all for your encouragement and thoughts - it really helps to know that this is a usual way for ocd to operate and that there is still hope for beating it despite the way ocd changes. Snowbear - shape-changer is a fabulous way to describe it and it will help to have a better way to explain it when I see my therapist this week.

Sara

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