Saz Posted February 2, 2016 Author Share Posted February 2, 2016 Thanks guys I appreciate the support. I'm really sorry about all this you know x Link to comment
gingerbreadgirl Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 no need to be sorry. you just need to act. xx Link to comment
Saz Posted February 3, 2016 Author Share Posted February 3, 2016 Hi Snowbear I'm not after reassurance but if i can just say that the feeling or urge came the very next day and that's another reason that keeps me stuck because it's almost like a 'you done something wrong' feeling, a 'real' guilt feeling that happened straight away and I have had those before so I know what they feel like. Anyways no need to reassure me, I know what I should be doing. Gbg you might be right about me not quite understanding how this works....There is no other explanation as to why I'm stuck if this is simply ocd false memory Appreciate your help everyone thank you x Link to comment
gingerbreadgirl Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 that's another reason that keeps me stuck I've heard you say this probably hundreds of times. You think you're stuck because it happened straight away, or because you've never had a false memory before, or because you'd been drinking, or because you have images... etc etc etc. There is just ONE reason you're stuck and it's because you won't stop doing compulsions. Link to comment
Binxy Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 Hope you have a better day today Saz. Feel the urge to ruminate but don't respond to it. You'll get there. Link to comment
snowbear Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 I know what I should be doing. There is no other explanation as to why I'm stuck Do you know what you should be doing, Saz? I'm not convinced. What you need to be doing is finding a different explanation for the urges you feel and for the memory which upsets you. Yet time after time you insist there is only one possible explanation. You interpret your your uncomfortable feelings as a sign the thought has validity. You interpret your difficulty in stopping compulsions as a sign the memory is true. You've been given alternative explanations, but time after time you reject them out of hand. You prefer to believe the feelings and urges are signs that support the memory as true. That's your choice to make, but you'll stay stuck until you open your mind to alternative explanations. And it is a choice you're making. You're choosing short-term relief over long-term freedom every single time you give in to the compulsion to go over the memory in your head looking for signs to confirm or disprove it. Link to comment
taurean Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 Saz, Just to add to that, the meanings and the connections the disorder is giving the thought are being given credence even over and above the testimony of recovered sufferers. Saz, see this and the above from snowy, and please make a note of this too - it will remind you of what you need to do, and what happens if you don't. Link to comment
DownTheRabbitHole Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 Hi Saz, I hope you read my achievement post. I've improved so much in just a short space of time by following the advice given to me on here. I have suffered false memories severely for over a year none stop, if I can make progress then so can you. Link to comment
taurean Posted February 4, 2016 Share Posted February 4, 2016 (edited) Thanks for that Downtherabbithole. We tend to forget, when tied up in our troubles, that this disorder operates in very distinct ways. What we think is unique to us is just another sufferer's experience of its working, with our especial theme. We need no particular skills or intellect to get better; we simply need to follow the guidance of those in the know - and ignore the urges of what we are told is the disorder. There is no "rocket science" here - no need to be an Einstein. Just believe and do as suggested. Edited February 4, 2016 by taurean Link to comment
Saz Posted February 5, 2016 Author Share Posted February 5, 2016 (edited) Thank you Roy. I wish you could all believe me when I say I'm trying and I really an not thinking about the 'false memory' or the horrible image/scenario. It's definately more of a feeling in me now and I suspect that it's because it's such a distressing thing and also because of how long I've thought about it all. There is a truly awful storyline on at the moment on one of the soaps and it just makes me feel so sick automatically when I here of it. What I think now is that even if I don relate it to my false memory conciously, I am just so sensitive to this kind of stuff that it just catches me out and plays on my mind. Not sure if I ever told you about the night I had ruined almost years ago before all this) because of a story I'd read in the newspaper, not only could I not get it out my mind but I took on the personal guilt of it all, even though it was totally unrelated to me in any way, shape or form. It's just crazy isn't it and scary. X Edited February 5, 2016 by Saz Link to comment
taurean Posted February 6, 2016 Share Posted February 6, 2016 I have that same (OCD) problem re the news.It happens whenever I have an OCD episode. But it is just another flavour of OCD. Link to comment
PolarBear Posted February 6, 2016 Share Posted February 6, 2016 It's definately more of a feeling in me now and I suspect that it's because it's such a distressing thing and also because of how long I've thought about it all. It's only a distressing thing to you. Most people would have dismissed the thought as irrelevant long ago. The reason you haven't is because you have OCD. You have thought about it for a long time. Three years if my recollection is right. All that thinking was a compulsion and I'm betting you still do it today because you still seek for certainty you can never have. Link to comment
Saz Posted February 10, 2016 Author Share Posted February 10, 2016 Hi polar. No I don't think on it as I say I'm just walking around with this horrible, terrible guilt feeling inside. I can't escape seeing things that sicken me and make me feel worse on the telly/media. On the soaps there is a horrific storyline, today in the news there is more of the same and then I'm seeing these videos pop up on face book and news articles of children being taken away from families unessacerrily then I get really upset because I think how sad and distressing it is for them and then I think of my kids...Sorry just need some words of comfort x Link to comment
gingerbreadgirl Posted February 10, 2016 Share Posted February 10, 2016 what kind of comfort are you looking for Saz? x Link to comment
Saz Posted February 10, 2016 Author Share Posted February 10, 2016 Just the normal kind x Link to comment
gingerbreadgirl Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 but what I mean is what do you want to be comforted about? it's not clear from your post. Are you generally upset about the fact that terrible things sometimes happen? Or are you upset about what you believe to be your role in it all? Because if the latter... you know what you're asking for x Link to comment
Saz Posted February 11, 2016 Author Share Posted February 11, 2016 Its probably a bit of both...I think I have what Roy has where I'm very sensitive to certain stories and pictures but yes it also makes me feel like my false memorie is true. And I start massively worrying about my children and imagine if they got tok away etc etc..x Link to comment
Binxy Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 Morning, Saz. I also get triggered by stuff in the media and on tv and if I'm not careful I find myself drawn into compulsions. The guilt feeling will pass as long as you make sure that you're not doing compulsions. I know this is so hard but does get better. Sorry I can't help more- I'm feeling pretty pants this morning too. Keep at it Saz- you'll get there. Link to comment
gingerbreadgirl Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 Its probably a bit of both imagine if they got tok away Saz - both of these things are examples of why you remain stuck. You look for short term comfort. You ruminate, you analyse, you try to find a solution to this terrible problem. Do you want to remain trapped in this situation forever? I'm guessing no. But by constantly trying to feel better in the short term - by trying to solve it - you are keeping yourself stuck. You will never be free of this if you keep trying to obtain comfort. You have to decide to be uncomfortable for a long time and stop trying to resolve it or make it go away. You will never be better if you try to solve it or find comfort. You will only get better once you decide to stop trying to find any answers. Be honest with yourself Saz - really honest - and start getting better. xx Link to comment
Saz Posted February 11, 2016 Author Share Posted February 11, 2016 I'm trying I really I am I can promise I do not sit here and try to remember anymore but I can help getting triggered or whatever, it's the constant feeling I have bit it's not because I'm trying to work it out. So I guess I need to not try and react to these 'triggers' and just feel anxious x Link to comment
gingerbreadgirl Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 I guess I need to not try and react to these 'triggers' and just feel anxious x Yes, that's absolutely what you should do x Link to comment
Saz Posted February 16, 2016 Author Share Posted February 16, 2016 Hiya I don't want to hijack the other thread as it's not really fair to do so. I just wanted to say that I do listen and I don't think I'm a special case or anything like that. I'm sat worrying now that this is all because of post traumatic stress and this is why I kept getting images and why it's so powerful because I've got ptsd from a real event. I'm trying not to overly think about this and hoping this will fade and that it's just another stupid intrusion x Link to comment
taurean Posted February 16, 2016 Share Posted February 16, 2016 Why are you listening to this Saz? We have told you many times it will try such tricks - why will you not believe us? And for me, the high compulsive urge upon the sufferer towards these kind of "explanations", plus all the doubt and uncertainty, are prima facie evidence that OCD is to blame!!! Link to comment
Guest stuckinmyhead Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm really disappointed my thread has turned into a heated debate! Link to comment
Guest stuckinmyhead Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 Sorry wrong thread! Link to comment
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