Fighting the battles but not winning the war

[Chelsie]

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Thinking about my OCD today and trying to get to the bottom of things.  I've done quite well at making 'baby steps' and avoiding taking on new worries this week.  However, the root of my main contamination anxiety is one event that happened 5 weeks and 3 days ago.  I know that I am, at the root of it all, hanging on for 6 weeks to be over, as this is the longest time that my (unfortunate) googling has told me that blood is contagious for (in this instance, with hep c). 

I'm feeling that I'm not really beating the main situation - my belief that this contamination has spread everywhere and is still a danger. I don't know how I will battle this basic belief, which is still so strong. Hoping that my first cbt appointment might help as, without winning this battle, I don't think I can win the OCD war. 

[taurean]

It's going to be about tackling the original core belief - the fear that blood you come across in any shape or form might contain hepetitis C and that might be dangerous.

The secondary belief  seems to be that that risk can contaminate, and the third belief is that the contamination can spread. .

This is quite a common version of contamination OCD and the therapist hopefully  know how to treat it. 

As the two Bears have said,resolve the initial core belief and the consequential two beliefs will have the ground taken away from under them.

56 minutes ago, Chelsie said:

 I know that I am, at the root of it all, hanging on for 6 weeks to be over, as this is the longest time that my (unfortunate) googling has told me that blood is contagious for (in this instance, with hep c). 

When you read this back Chelsie, can you see how this perceived risk is being taken to its ultimate extreme - i.e. the risk is only deemed over when science says it is no more?

For everyone else, the risk is probably not given any or at least a second thought right back at the time of alleged exposure - nor would any chain of contamination exist. 

Of course, it is easier to take this view when not the sufferer, but at least it shows the cognitive process in you, and how others don't react - an ulktimate goal to aim for.

Edited January 14, 2017 by taurean
typo

[Chelsie]

Being on this forum has made me recognise that the strongest emotion OCD makes me feel is revulsion. That's probably why when it's really bad it makes me physically sick. This is what I really need to tackle through cbt 

[taurean]

Well it seems to be a combination of the revulsion plus the fear re the blood. 

The good thing is that you have acquired some cognitive understanding of what is going on, so that will help you  and the therapist in therapy. 

[Chelsie]

Yes there's fear too, but my first reaction on seeing anything remotely resembling blood is to feel revulsion. I think this heightens my awareness of it, rather than being able to just brush over it as a non-OCD person would, and that gives space for the fear to creep in. 

[PolarBear]

ERP can help you get over your revulsion feelings. Exposing yourself and practicing not doing compulsions will get you used to blood as the benign thing it is.

[Chelsie]

I hope so, Polar Bear.  

[Chelsie]

Been thing about your post yesterday, Polar Bear.  Trying to reframe my reaction to blood and see it as 'benign'.  The problem is, I know that it isn't always harmless and the first aid training I have had obviously reinforces the idea that it is a potential carrier of viruses etc. Trying to rationalise how I can have these two ideas sitting side by side in my brain. 

[PolarBear]

OCD blows the risk all out of proportion. There is risk in almost everything we do. People accept that and live their lives. It's because the possibility that something bad will happen is so low as to be negligible. You have to learn that the risk you feel is not real. It's coming from OCD, not from reality.

[taurean]

Great answer PolarBear. 

At work part of my job was advising clients about risk management. 

Now I could walk into a building and very quickly form an opinion of any especial physical risks presented by the way the business looked. And this would include seeable risks to health. 

This wasn't a full on professional risk control survey, but with experience you get pretty good. 

I never saw anything which caused me to demand any especial treatment other than moving things dusting things  or security or fire prevention measures.