Asbestos fear please help

[PolarBear]

"It feels like the risk has now doubled." Feels like, but in reality there is no risk. None at all.

You need to learn that OCD is governing your thinking right now. It pushes the panic button and you react (badly). You need to wise up to OCD's ways. It lies, every time, all the time. It is OCD telling you that there is a huge risk, not a logical brain. There is nothing out there that shows you there is any kind of risk whatsoever. You are getting that from faulty signals from your own mind. Start to realize that and you can start to fight back by not reacting so badly to the thoughts of risk and by not doing compulsions.

Now you're probably considering phoning the other company to inquire about this wallet. Don't do it. Take a stand and toss the thing in the trash. End it. Contacting them would be just another compulsion that won't bring you peace of mind.

Compulsions are done to try and alleviate the distress you feel caused by intrusive thoughts. But they never work that way. Oh, you might get temporary relief, but soon enough more intrusive thoughts and doubt surface and you're back to square one again. It's a game that OCD plays. Learn to stop playing the game.

[Mike_Check]

I understand your not meant to reassure sufferers but not catastrophizing and seeing things in a black and white, perfect or horrific way is also a big part of CBT.

I lived in a room with asbestos in the roof for about 8 months and didn't feel anything in terms of negative health effects. Professionals knew it was there but it was the solid version that isn't generally an issue and they didn't need to remove it.

If there is a teeny, tiny, chance of asbestos,  it's not like plutonium or cyanide. It takes years of obvious exposure to be harmful.

 

[Mike_Check]

not black/white* not perfect/horrific*

[St Mike]

Not to add to your worries, just to put things into perspective and rationalised the situation; technically speaking, smoking and 2nd hand smoke is more dangerous and opportunities for exposure to such is even higher as compared to exposure to asbestos. I don't smoke or drink but get plenty of 2nd hand smoke when I was in the armed forces and when I accompanied my bosses to pubs and bars. I am not worried about that either.

Why not spent your time focusing (not obsessively) on planning a healthy diet and an exercise programme for you and your family? The money saved from not doing asbesos testing could be utilised for a family trip to somewhere sunny and everyone can get to enjoy the great outdoors or kept for a rainny day or even better, Christmas presents for your boys.

Edited October 18, 2017 by St Mike

[Amd80]

But there must be an increased chance of a risk. What if the plastic wallet had been used to store the tools in, and then asbestos fibres had got into the wallet.

My husband has thrown it in the bin and I can't find it to check. Surely a company shouldn't be leaving things around like this? I can't believe I didn't see it, I'm always so clean and tidy but it was under the chair and the hoover sucked it up.

I feel sick with worry, we use the living room for hours on end.

Amanda

[Mike_Check]

The reason it took decades to recognize it as a problem is because it takes significant exposure over long periods to do any damage. It sounds like your safer than 99% of the population.

[PolarBear]

4 hours ago, Amd80 said:

But there must be an increased chance of a risk. What if the plastic wallet had been used to store the tools in, and then asbestos fibres had got into the wallet.

My husband has thrown it in the bin and I can't find it to check. Surely a company shouldn't be leaving things around like this? I can't believe I didn't see it, I'm always so clean and tidy but it was under the chair and the hoover sucked it up.

I feel sick with worry, we use the living room for hours on end.

Amanda

There is no risk. Your mind is telling you there is but OCD lies, all the time. Is your husband freaking out about this? How many of your friends go on about asbestos risks? Doesn't that tell you something? 

It's all OCD. 

[Amd80]

Hi Polar Bear

But most of the people I know have never had asbestos people coming into their houses to take samples.

The fact I have, coupled with the fact I have found two plastic wallets which I can't attribute to coming from anything else, puts a great fear in my mind. If it had been a random plastic wallet and I hadn't had asbestos people in recently I wouldn't have thought anything of it, but I am now worrying about the possibility of contamination.

Amanda

[seb79]

Amd80 you need to label this as ocd and move on. Spend time with family. If you allow it, it can end up ruining your life

[PolarBear]

10 hours ago, Amd80 said:

Hi Polar Bear

But most of the people I know have never had asbestos people coming into their houses to take samples.

The fact I have, coupled with the fact I have found two plastic wallets which I can't attribute to coming from anything else, puts a great fear in my mind. If it had been a random plastic wallet and I hadn't had asbestos people in recently I wouldn't have thought anything of it, but I am now worrying about the possibility of contamination.

Amanda

But you were worried about contamination before these people were in testing. Nothing has changed. You still have the same irrational fear. 

You need to put your foot down and say enough already. 

[Amd80]

Polar Bear

But how do you know this is ocd as opposed to a genuine risk? 

What if asbestos had been in that bag? 

Amanda

[PolarBear]

Well, you never know for sure. That's life. We go about our lives being uncertain about a lot of things. You can't be certain that you won't be hit by a bus tomorrow. Yet you go out and do the things you do.

OCD craves certainty but it can never have it. That's why you had all those tests, to be certain. But it didn't work, did It? You're no more certain today than when this whole thing started.

As a practical matter, testers are there to test for the existence of asbestos, not spread it around. If their equipment was covered in asbestos I imagine they would get a lot of false positives in their tests, which clearly didn't happen in your case because they found no asbestos.

I can tell this is OCD because of the existence of intrusive thoughts, the distress they cause you and the existence of compulsions.

No one gets multiple tests for asbestos while their anxiety flares and then starts distrusting the tools used to do the test except for an OCD sufferer.

You need to come to terms with the fact that you have a problem and it's not asbestos.

[Amd80]

Polar Bear

Thank you so much for you patient replies, I know it's frustrating!

I just got another really bad worry. Not sure how plausible this sounds.

After I found the wallet I cleaned under the chair and black debris/dust came onto the wipe. I'm now worrying that this is why the sample bag I found was empty - that the actual sample material had fallen out under my chair, meaning asbestos debris could have been loose.

Amanda

[PolarBear]

What do you think you should do?

[Amd80]

Polar Bear

I honestly don't know because I don't know what level of risk I am dealing with. Worse case, someone's asbestos sample spilt under a chair - that possibility is what is preventing me from moving on, as I have caused this by having unnecessary tests. I just can't live with the possibility I have put my beautiful children at risk of harm, and I'll have to live with that possibility indefinitely as asbestos disease takes so long to come on.

Amanda

[PolarBear]

What you should do is nothing. No more tests. No more contacting the companies. No more ruminating. That last one is the big one. I know you're sitting there going over the fear and thoughts in your head and it's all for nothing. Leave it alone.

 

Edited October 19, 2017 by PolarBear