What does all this mean?

[NoahsArk]

I don't know what's going on with me lately. About 14 years ago, when I was 23, I was playing soccer in a field with tall grass. Another guy who was playing lost his cross that he was wearing on his necklace. Players from both teams had been searching for it. I don't know what came over me, but I just developed this strong feeling that I would find it. A few seconds later I saw the shape of a cross in the grass and picked it up. Everyone was happy. I remember that one girl who I thought was kind of pretty said "You have the power" hehe. 

Then last Monday night, on New Year's day, I was walking into the building where I was playing a chess tournament. My score was 3 out of 3 and I was about to play the last round. If I won or even drew the game, I would finally become a chess master which has been a goal of mine for many years. On my way back into the building I saw another player, who I know from the chess scene, outside with his cell phone flash light on looking carefully at the ground. I almost just walked back inside, but something made me want to help him. I asked what he was looking for, and he told me he'd never find it. It was some cylinder shaped thing (maybe something that he also wore on his necklace) that had clear whitish color. There was snow and ice on the ground so it would have blended in.

I remembered the soccer game a long time ago. I turned on my cell phone light and shined it on the ground. A few seconds later, he spotted the cylinder on the ground, in the spot where I shined my light, and happily thanked me. I felt something special at that moment and wanted to share with him how I found the cross years earlier.  I decided not to mention it, though, because I told myself in the past that if I experience something that I feel is auspicious and mysterious like this, I don't have to share it. After all, if there is some power out there, it will be there regardless of whether I mention it or not, and it's not my job to convey this information. 

I feel crazy now even thinking this. After walking back into the building I felt immediately bad about not having told him, and all the positive feelings that I had minutes earlier were gone. I then played my game and lost. Now I think I should have told him about the soccer game. I feel like the fact that I found something twice like this is meaningful, and I should've shared it with him. Today I almost called someone and asked if they had his phone number. I was going to make up some excuse for calling him so that I could then tell him about how i found the cross. Now I feel like I can't succeed until I tell him. 

What is going on here. Am I just being superstitious, obsessive, or both? I want to try and understand myself better and improve. 

Thanks.

 

 

[snowbear]

11 minutes ago, NoahsArk said:

What is going on here. 

Very simple. You're reading meanings into things that have no meaning. Zero, zilch - no meaning at all. You don't have superpowers, nobody does. 

13 minutes ago, NoahsArk said:

Now I feel like I can't succeed until I tell him. 

If you keep telling yourself nonsense like this you'll probably lose a lot more games of chess that you would otherwise have won by subconsciously sabotaging your best efforts. If you were to take these losses as further proof you need to tell him before you can succeed (a misinterpretation) you'd be well on your way to another round of obsessive compulsive thinking.

So instead nip it in the bud and accept these were unrelated coincidences. Get your thinking away from ideas of magic and luck, and stick with reality. 

[NoahsArk]

Thank you! i will try and fight this and get back to reality!