New home but I worry about my partner relapsing.

[Ellie jord]

Hi everyone I'm new to this forum and it's nice to know there are others out there with the same worries as me. Me and my partner have been together 3 years. He was diagnosed with OCD last year and it's been tough, he has issues with trust in the relationship and contamination. We recently moved out of a toxic shared house into our own and although he's not been terrible. I see little signs of a relapse his temper his concern and worst case scenario mentality is flaring up he's very protective over our dog and any potential situation that makes him uncomfortable he seems to shut down. I'm so worried about him I want to give him time to adjust and give him better support but I don't know how  and I find myself just fighting him as I feel he's not trying and completely doesn't see he's slipping. Any advise for how best to support him?

[snowbear]

Hi Ellie, welcome to the forum. 

I think you're one step ahead already by recognising there is a 'mentality' or way of thinking he slips into. But it doesn't sound as though he recognises that change in thinking in himself. Has he had any CBT? Is he open to the idea of seeking therapy? 

Temper and fighting each other suggests perhaps some of the stress you thought you'd left behind when you moved has followed you. Do you have some time set aside for relaxation, either separately or together? Sometimes it's easier to talk after a chill out session at the gym (or whatever mode of relaxation you prefer!)

'Time to adjust' can easily become 'letting things slide' so consider talking to him about your concerns sooner rather than later, especially if the contamination ideas seem to have transferred with him to the new home/new start. Often people with OCD think they can leave contamination behind as if it was a real entity rather than something which exists only in their mind.