Ruminating

[Wood123]

Best way to stop ruminateing it feel so real again 

[PolarBear]

I made a YouTube video called 'How to stop ruminating'. Check it out.

[gingerbreadgirl]

1 hour ago, PolarBear said:

I made a YouTube video called 'How to stop ruminating'. Check it out.

It is a great video, I really recommend it. Thanks PB

Edited April 6, 2018 by gingerbreadgirl

[Wood123]

Any links 

[snowbear]

2 hours ago, Wood123 said:

Any links 

Hi Wood, 

The video GBG refers to has some self-promotion/self-advertising on it so forum rules prohibit posting the direct link. But you can find the video on YouTube quite easily if you type the title GBG gave you into the YouTube  search box.

[gingerbreadgirl]

Apologies - sorry for posting I know links aren't allowed :-/

[snowbear]

No worries GBG. Links that don't advertise for paid services, self-promotion, or give advice contrary to UK guidelines on treating OCD are allowed. 

It's a great video - just a shame the last few minutes refer to paid services or it would probably be the most linked-to vid on the forum!

 

[Wood123]

18 hours ago, snowbear said:

Hi Wood, 

The video GBG refers to has some self-promotion/self-advertising on it so forum rules prohibit posting the direct link. But you can find the video on YouTube quite easily if you type the title GBG gave you into the YouTube  search box.

Did have look but can't find it

[snowbear]

Hi Wood,

Polar Bear has kindly edited his video and we can now use it on the forum.  Here's the new link:

 

[Running Lover]

On 06/04/2018 at 16:13, PolarBear said:

I made a YouTube video called 'How to stop ruminating'. Check it out.

 Hi. I watched the video which is brilliant. Also had a look at ocd life. I’m confused not by your video but by ruminating. I’m having trouble worrying about something from my past at the moment. The trouble is it does warrant some worrying. With that in mind ruminating to me seems the logical thing to do because I am worried and when even none ocd people are worried surely that’s what they do ( think about what they are worried about ). 

[gingerbreadgirl]

Hi Running Lover,

Ruminating is the process of going over something in your mind but never reaching any kind of resolution or solution.  For this reason ruminating is never helpful, either for OCD thoughts or non-OCD thoughts.  Ruminating is not the same as productive thinking.  Snowbear suggested to me recently that if you haven't got any closer to a solution after ten minutes, then any further thinking will add nothing - it will just make you doubt more, worry more, obsess more.

[Running Lover]

I’ve ruminated for years about what I’m thinking about at the moment. If that’s the case is it just better to confess? But then that’s a compulsion? I don’t understand. 

[gingerbreadgirl]

1 minute ago, Running Lover said:

I’ve ruminated for years about what I’m thinking about at the moment. If that’s the case is it just better to confess? But then that’s a compulsion? I don’t understand. 

No, the answer is to leave it alone, unsolved.

[Running Lover]

But surely it’s best to be honest if you’ve done something wrong. I’m so upset about it. 

[gingerbreadgirl]

1 minute ago, Running Lover said:

But surely it’s best to be honest if you’ve done something wrong. I’m so upset about it. 

This is what OCD says.  To recover from OCD you must do the opposite of what it's telling you, no matter how compelling it seems, no matter how upset and anxious it makes you feel. It is incredibly difficult but you have to take a long view rather than focusing on what you're feeling right now. x

[PolarBear]

You are welcome, bird.

[PolarBear]

10 hours ago, Running Lover said:

But surely it’s best to be honest if you’ve done something wrong. I’m so upset about it. 

Where is it written that you must divulge all the bad/stupid things you did when you were younger? How many of your friends/family members cinfess bad things they've done?

If you confess now, do you know what will happen? Another stupid thing will pop in your head and you'll want to confess it. Then another and another. And it will be ten times harder to stop at that point.

[Running Lover]

I wasn’t that young though. I just don’t see how people know when to confess things and when not to 

[PolarBear]

It happened before was my point. We get wiser as we get older, or so the theory goes. 

This is a common OCD theme. Seen it lots. Sufferers think they are obliged to fully disclose everything about themselves so others can form an informed decision. But are those other people, the ones you want to confess to, confessing stuff to you? Because there are no saints in this world. Everyone does stuff they are not proud of. So are they cinfessing stuff to you? If not, why should you be the only one?

[Wood123]

55 minutes ago, PolarBear said:

It happened before was my point. We get wiser as we get older, or so the theory goes. 

This is a common OCD theme. Seen it lots. Sufferers think they are obliged to fully disclose everything about themselves so others can form an informed decision. But are those other people, the ones you want to confess to, confessing stuff to you? Because there are no saints in this world. Everyone does stuff they are not proud of. So are they cinfessing stuff to you? If not, why should you be the only one?

Hi bear can I ask wot u suffer with

[PolarBear]

I don't suffer anymore. Haven't for about four years. Previously I had a mish mash of themes, notably pedophile and harm obsessions.

Edited April 8, 2018 by PolarBear

[Wood123]

7 minutes ago, PolarBear said:

I don't suffer anymore. Haven't for about four years. Previously I had a mish mash of themes, notably pedophile and harm obsessions.

Ok thanks for getting back to me I think I just need to stop ruminateing be cause I Dow ruminate when I'm out busy it just when I'm home

[1Littlefoot]

From a mum of a 21old  young son OCD sufferer -  how does an OCD sufferer ' recognise '  / 'catch themselves ' ruminating and so try to stop doing it by the ways suggested? When he's in a whirl of anxiety nothing seems to get through.

If I am around I can help him to see the situation ( very challenging for us both - and not the best way forward as I know I musn't become part of the whole process - not good - reassurance etc!).

I have looked at the video - think I picked up the idea of if you are thinking of solving an insolvable problem e.g.  - what is truth / what do I know / how can I be strong  (all past ruminations he had got better at tackling at least in so far as physical ruminations - he used to write endlessly - now he thinks endlessly in his head and I 'm the only one at home that understands  what's going on)    - how can I fix my back' ( he has a damaged vertebrae and won't use traditional techniques to help relieve the pain  - which adds to his anxiety and depressed mood as it's stopped all his favourite sport and so curtailed exercise)  - .......   say for more than 10 mins ( he goes to bed in his clothes and does this for hours  - unless I coach him out of bed and back to doing ordinary in the moment things ).  So that's something practical I can suggest to him.

 

Is there anything else I can suggest please that I can pass on to him? 

 

He's in limbo at the moment and getting really down - so OCD getting worse  - CBT clinical psychologist on long term leave for a few more weeks and psychiatrist now only doing NHS work now not private so we've lost that extra help - NHs support is like buses - never there when needed!  So I'm having to help him and running out of ideas. 

 

I've tried to get him on these forums - but I think it just scares him more!     

 

Thanks   

[gingerbreadgirl]

8 hours ago, 1Littlefoot said:

From a mum of a 21old  young son OCD sufferer -  how does an OCD sufferer ' recognise '  / 'catch themselves ' ruminating and so try to stop doing it by the ways suggested? When he's in a whirl of anxiety nothing seems to get through.

If I am around I can help him to see the situation ( very challenging for us both - and not the best way forward as I know I musn't become part of the whole process - not good - reassurance etc!).

I have looked at the video - think I picked up the idea of if you are thinking of solving an insolvable problem e.g.  - what is truth / what do I know / how can I be strong  (all past ruminations he had got better at tackling at least in so far as physical ruminations - he used to write endlessly - now he thinks endlessly in his head and I 'm the only one at home that understands  what's going on)    - how can I fix my back' ( he has a damaged vertebrae and won't use traditional techniques to help relieve the pain  - which adds to his anxiety and depressed mood as it's stopped all his favourite sport and so curtailed exercise)  - .......   say for more than 10 mins ( he goes to bed in his clothes and does this for hours  - unless I coach him out of bed and back to doing ordinary in the moment things ).  So that's something practical I can suggest to him.

 

Is there anything else I can suggest please that I can pass on to him? 

 

He's in limbo at the moment and getting really down - so OCD getting worse  - CBT clinical psychologist on long term leave for a few more weeks and psychiatrist now only doing NHS work now not private so we've lost that extra help - NHs support is like buses - never there when needed!  So I'm having to help him and running out of ideas. 

 

I've tried to get him on these forums - but I think it just scares him more!     

 

Thanks   

Hi 1littlefoot,

Have you or your son read any self-help books on OCD? Break free from OCD is a good one, as is Pulling the trigger.  They offer loads of practical solutions for improving and breaking out of this horrible condition.