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What have you done today to challenge your OCD?


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Guest OCDhavenobrain

Got triggered today. A homeless guy stood at a busstation and tried to pee i guess. I think it was the same guy as last time. It is 200 meters from the hospital. My thinking goes something like exposing is trauma in a sense. So i was going back and he was leaning forwards. 

20 min later . I cant remember my accountlogins to anpther forum. But i will go home and ask if it is trauma. I mean on the forum. Now i habe to go home.

Edited by OCDhavenobrain
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Guest OCDhavenobrain

I am overall doing good. The thing is that i am not thinking about OCD as much as i used to. 
However i start to feel the stress from the last month. And i get this feeling that my OCD offers me to "be there" i mean i have been with OCD for so long and like many others here says, we have done a lot of compulsions, now if one is to stopp doing it we also have to face that what we are good at is of no use any longer. I mean we are all good at doing compulsions but it is useless. 

What I mean is that i mean we are all used to doing compulsions it is pretty scary to think of a life without them, atleast I think. Does this make any sense to anyone? 

I think i am going to watch movies or something. 

Edited by OCDhavenobrain
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41 minutes ago, OCDhavenobrain said:


What I mean is that i mean we are all used to doing compulsions it is pretty scary to think of a life without them, atleast I think. Does this make sense to anyone?

Yes it does, it's a common experience. 

The way forward is to work on replacing the compulsions (worthless activities)  with useful enjoyable worthwhile activities. 

Time to rediscover hobbies, friends, do things together, maybe join a club or society - build back any lost social life. 

OCD likes a vacuum and will slink back in, so don't give it one :)

 

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Guest OCDhavenobrain
Just now, taurean said:

Yes it does, it's a common experience. 

The way forward is to work on replacing the compulsions (worthless activities)  with useful enjoyable worthwhile activities. 

Time to rediscover hobbies, friends, do things together, maybe join a club or society - build back any lost social life. 

OCD likes a vacuum and will slink back in, so don't give it one :)

 

Thank you, scary is the right word. :(  I also like to argue with myself so I will have to watch myself so it doesn't get obsessive. 
But the main problem is that it seems scary. All those obsessions have been there for so long. And I hate to say it but we are all good at doing them, they are so automated and they take up a lot of our concentration, so it feels like we are doing something, we are doing something, but it is destructive. 

WELL WELL have to accept it and move on. 

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Guest OCDhavenobrain

Beside me getting a strange thought when i feelt that my hair was kinda sticky in a place I have done good today. The thought was about a guy in a queue in the store which i thought got very close than did he go to the left so what if he did something in between. perfect cover up to go to the left afterwards. 

I don't know about you guys but it will be ok with me when the temperatures drop. As long as it isn't under 0 degrees.

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Guest OCDhavenobrain

I woke up and I get those thoughts about what if it was something in my hair. I have earplugs of wax which makes my hair as sticky sometimes, a dark side of me thinks that mailing the store is the solution I mean the have videocamersas and everything. It never went into axnietymode yesterday, it was on the borderline so to speak. Hope I can let it stay there today. 

Wonder where Gingerbread is, hope she is doing OK.

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Guest OCDhavenobrain

So i went outside today. Eased it. 

 

2 months ago here was young kids running around here and knocking on doors and stuff, haven't been here but today the come again. So it get me kinda triggered.

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I have just written out a TFB cycle for the first really hard step on my heirarchy of fears, which relates to touching things I think I have 'contaminated' without washing my hands afterwards. Up to now I have made progress, but it has all been related to other 'contamination' that exists in the world, which is easier for me to deal with. Hopefully, I'll  do my first ERP on this tomorrow, if I'm ready.

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I'll try to explain this as concisely as possible... I've had a spike in anxiety, but I'm going to try to ride it out and not give in to any compulsions...

Due to forgetfulness, poor planning and a very busy schedule, I haven't been able to properly clean/mop the floor in our house for quite some time now. Also, a few days ago I noticed a big unknown reddish stain on the kitchen floor, which possibly came from the bin, and I didn't manage to clean it up before it was stood on and therefore spread throughout the house. All in all, the floor is pretty dirty right now. Which isn't ideal. On top of it all, I haven't been wearing slippers in the house lately as mine broke, so I've just been wearing my socks. This means that every pair of socks I've worn in the past week got quite dirty from being in contact with the floor.

Now comes the particularly anxiety-inducing part: I washed all the towels in my house today together with the socks, as that's what I've always done. However, usually the socks aren't anywhere near as dirty as the ones from the past week, so I'm worried that the towels have been contaminated with dirt and germs from the socks, especially since the wash cycle was short (although it was the 'normal' wash cycle at the launderette) and I only selected the warm water option instead of hot water. I'm tempted to rewash the towels separately, but I feel like maybe that's a compulsion and I should just use the towels as they are now. They're not visibly dirty, but I do worry about the contamination. I think I'll try my best not to give in to temptation and wait until next week, when I do the laundry again, before I put them back in the machine. Hopefully I won't contaminate everyone at home and at work...!

Edited by bobfish
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23 hours ago, taurean said:

Good luck with this work LeopardM. 

Thanks taurean. I did the exposure today and it was a partial success, I did have to wash my hands afterwards, but not before I had touched a few other things first. So now I have some anxiety about touching those things tomorrow, but I'm going to do it anyway. My OCD is trying to tell me those things are 'contaminated' but rationally I know they are not.

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1 hour ago, LeopardM said:

Thanks taurean. I did the exposure today and it was a partial success, I did have to wash my hands afterwards, but not before I had touched a few other things first. So now I have some anxiety about touching those things tomorrow, but I'm going to do it anyway. My OCD is trying to tell me those things are 'contaminated' but rationally I know they are not.

Exactly. Don't listen to it. 

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11 hours ago, LeopardM said:

Thanks taurean. I did the exposure today and it was a partial success, I did have to wash my hands afterwards, but not before I had touched a few other things first. So now I have some anxiety about touching those things tomorrow, but I'm going to do it anyway. My OCD is trying to tell me those things are 'contaminated' but rationally I know they are not.

Woo, great job! You've got this!

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12 hours ago, taurean said:

How do you think someone without contamination OCD would deal with this scenario? 

I'm not sure, to be honest... Use the towels and not worry about it?

Or they might wash the towels again separately... I can't really tell.

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Of course there are risks around substances and germs, but OCD grossly exaggerates and creates chain links which actually don't exist. 

See if you can spot the OCD weighed against a real threat. When you can do that, you are on the money and the road to recovery. The greatest thing in tackling OCD is when we can start to "fly solo". 

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taurean and bobfish, thanks for your support it really helped. I managed to do today's exposure with just one compulsion, and as soon as I did it I was cross with myself and didn't do it again. I kept telling myself, do I want to listen to the OCD or to the CBT and the advice on the forum? It wasn't easy but I feel like I've made another small step forwards.

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