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I'm writing this for my benefit and everyone else's.

I'm not sure that OCD is beatable. I've had it from my teens and am now 33. It could have always been there. In the duration I have done quite well but also had a lot of failures too, and am now stuck in a terrible moment of my life

This only leaves me with 1 conclusion;

To embrace who I am, be comfortable in my own skin and accept me as me. Coupled with this one has to be aware of the society around them, and 'play the game'.

I was thinking 'the joker' and Harley Quinn, they totally embrace their 'nuttiness' . They just don't accept society. WE must do both.

So;

I have a strange compulsion I've had for the last maybe 5/6 years of ALWAYS needing to blow my nose even if unnecessary. NOW there will be some situations where it's not appropriate and I have to fully focus on the situation in hand. But I have to learn to accept any discomfort I may feel inside my nostrils. Equally I have to accept that I can blow my nose again and again if I feel the need or want to. And not freak out or become very self-conscious about it. I shouldn't have to battle fight or try to hurt the demon I have going on inside me or what other may think of me.

Let's embrace, and if so...go a bit over the top and 'nutty' like the joker or Harley Quinn just as long as one accepts society or doesn't put themselves in a losing position! Play the game!

:)

Have a fantastic weekend All! 

Lots of love, why not?!  :)  ;)

 

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Well Andrew, OCD is beatable. 

It can be done, and it involves knowledge of how it works then applying the necessary thinking and behavioural changes. 

Instead of focusing right in on something, which OCD wants us to do, we need to open up our viewing lens, and focus out, away from the obsession, then ease it into peripheral vision, then away. 

This is one of a number of really helpful tips I learned in CBT therapy. 

I had a strange compulsion as a child - to pull the alarm chord on a train. 

I realised this was pointless, and not only that, it would cause considerable inconvenience to many people, and get me into trouble. 

When I knew that, and gave no meaning or beluef to the compulsive urge when it came calling, it eventually lost interest and faded away. It reduced in power and frequency. 

That's how to deal with a compulsive urge. 

Edited by taurean
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2 hours ago, Andrewc said:

embrace who I am, be comfortable in my own skin and accept me as me.

Absolutely. 100% agree. 

However, you are NOT your OCD. :no:  Don't confuse embracing who you are (a positive thing to do) with embracing OCD (a very negative thing to do.) 

OCD is beatable. Giving in to it is allowing OCD to beat you.

I know beating OCD isn't easy, but giving up the fight is unfortunately very easy, especially if you've tried a few times and not had much success yet.

One thing is certain - if you embrace OCD and stop fighting it will take over more and more of your life and make you more and more miserable as the decades pass. :( 

3 hours ago, Andrewc said:

I have to learn to accept any discomfort I may feel inside my nostrils.

:yes: This will gradually weaken the urge to keep blowing your nose. 

3 hours ago, Andrewc said:

Equally I have to accept that I can blow my nose again and again if I feel the need or want to. And not freak out or become very self-conscious about it. I shouldn't have to battle fight or try to hurt the demon I have going on inside me or what other may think of me.

Part right. :unsure: Part wrong. :( 

If you decide you can  blow your nose as much as you want whenever you feel the need, what you're saying is 'I'm going to give in to my compulsions and stuff the consequences.' 

The consequences are dire. :( You'll be ever more tightly held in the grip of your OCD beliefs and urges, 'needing' to blow your nose more often, and you may damage your nose/sinuses from such regular pressure increases (which they aren't designed for.) 

However, you don't need to be self-conscious about being in recovery. Recovery takes time and while you're working towards that goal you have every right to hold your head high and tell the world 'This is the stage of recovery I'm at, so don't judge me. I'm trying. I'm getting there.'  :) 

Two different ways of embracing self-confidence, but one is damaging and the other empowering. Your choice which one to go for.  

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Hey Snowbear

Many thanks for your detailed and informative message.

I just got back from Sainsburys and was thinking about the things you said. And in fact they really benefited me. I did feel more confident and people were more endearing towards me. I also tried SO HARD to reduce the blowing but ALSO when I do this 'try and stop blowing' I know for a fact that I look heavily stressed, anxious and probably somewhat aggressive. Because it is very scary, and quite a constant 'freak out' moment. And I feel that this is why people become very put off by me when I'm like this, and I would go far as saying 'Cruel'. However just abiding and thinking about your message this morning, and even putting it into practice made the walk there and back, and the shop a bit easier. But I did see the mirror when I got back, and it was quite a dark site. 

14 hours ago, snowbear said:

Absolutely. 100% agree. 

However, you are NOT your OCD. :no:  Don't confuse embracing who you are (a positive thing to do) with embracing OCD (a very negative thing to do.) 

OCD is beatable. Giving in to it is allowing OCD to beat you.

I know beating OCD isn't easy, but giving up the fight is unfortunately very easy, especially if you've tried a few times and not had much success yet.

One thing is certain - if you embrace OCD and stop fighting it will take over more and more of your life and make you more and more miserable as the decades pass. :( 

:yes: This will gradually weaken the urge to keep blowing your nose. 

Part right. :unsure: Part wrong. :( 

If you decide you can  blow your nose as much as you want whenever you feel the need, what you're saying is 'I'm going to give in to my compulsions and stuff the consequences.' 

The consequences are dire. :( You'll be ever more tightly held in the grip of your OCD beliefs and urges, 'needing' to blow your nose more often, and you may damage your nose/sinuses from such regular pressure increases (which they aren't designed for.) 

However, you don't need to be self-conscious about being in recovery. Recovery takes time and while you're working towards that goal you have every right to hold your head high and tell the world 'This is the stage of recovery I'm at, so don't judge me. I'm trying. I'm getting there.'  :) 

Two different ways of embracing self-confidence, but one is damaging and the other empowering. Your choice which one to go for.  

And in some ways Ocd can be a personality trait just as long as it doesn't ruin one's life and they can't progress the way they want to. Which is me in a nutshell! That's why I have to work harder like you said. It was a really great response. :)

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9 minutes ago, Andrewc said:

Hey Snowbear

Many thanks for your detailed and informative message.

I just got back from Sainsburys and was thinking about the things you said. And in fact they really benefited me. I did feel more confident and people were more endearing towards me. I also tried SO HARD to reduce the blowing but ALSO when I do this 'try and stop blowing' I know for a fact that I look heavily stressed, anxious and probably somewhat aggressive. Because it is very scary, and quite a constant 'freak out' moment. And I feel that this is why people become very put off by me when I'm like this, and I would go far as saying 'Cruel'. However just abiding and thinking about your message this morning, and even putting it into practice made the walk there and back, and the shop a bit easier. But I did see the mirror when I got back, and it was quite a dark site. 

And in some ways Ocd can be a personality trait just as long as it doesn't ruin one's life and they can't progress the way they want to. Which is me in a nutshell! That's why I have to work harder like you said. It was a really great response. :)

 

14 hours ago, snowbear said:

Absolutely. 100% agree. 

However, you are NOT your OCD. :no:  Don't confuse embracing who you are (a positive thing to do) with embracing OCD (a very negative thing to do.) 

OCD is beatable. Giving in to it is allowing OCD to beat you.

I know beating OCD isn't easy, but giving up the fight is unfortunately very easy, especially if you've tried a few times and not had much success yet.

One thing is certain - if you embrace OCD and stop fighting it will take over more and more of your life and make you more and more miserable as the decades pass. :( 

:yes: This will gradually weaken the urge to keep blowing your nose. 

Part right. :unsure: Part wrong. :( 

If you decide you can  blow your nose as much as you want whenever you feel the need, what you're saying is 'I'm going to give in to my compulsions and stuff the consequences.' 

The consequences are dire. :( You'll be ever more tightly held in the grip of your OCD beliefs and urges, 'needing' to blow your nose more often, and you may damage your nose/sinuses from such regular pressure increases (which they aren't designed for.) 

However, you don't need to be self-conscious about being in recovery. Recovery takes time and while you're working towards that goal you have every right to hold your head high and tell the world 'This is the stage of recovery I'm at, so don't judge me. I'm trying. I'm getting there.'  :) 

Two different ways of embracing self-confidence, but one is damaging and the other empowering. Your choice which one to go for.  

And 1 other thing; Whenever the nose compulsion settles, the compulsions switch to either constantly having the need to swallow, drink water (not related to b4), earphones falling out my ears so will push them in constantly or maybe just any other intrusive thought. Or it could be pulling up my trousers like constantly, even when unneccesary.

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Guest OCDhavenobrain
2 minutes ago, Andrewc said:

 

And 1 other thing; Whenever the nose compulsion settles, the compulsions switch to either constantly having the need to swallow, drink water (not related to b4), earphones falling out my ears so will push them in constantly or maybe just any other intrusive thought. Or it could be pulling up my trousers like constantly, even when unneccesary.

How do you feel this relative to what she wrote. No offence here but this is important, because i think your OCD is taking over you here and now. 

And you really need to have a long-term look at recovery. Very imporant 

Edited by OCDhavenobrain
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7 hours ago, Andrewc said:

Whenever the nose compulsion settles, the compulsions switch to either constantly having the need to swallow, drink water, earphones falling out my ears so will push them in constantly or maybe just any other intrusive thought. Or it could be pulling up my trousers like constantly, even when unneccesary.

Compulsive urges often switch focus, so you conquer one and another takes its place.  Nothing unusual in that. You need to apply the same ERP/behavioural exercises to each scenario whatever the urge. 

But solely doing behavioural therapy on these urges is like topping up the oil in a leaky car engine. It'll keep you on the road, but it's not getting to the bottom of the problem.

So you may also benefit from some cognitive therapy to identify the common factor to these urges which triggers a 'got to fix it' response.

For example, it may be you get the urge to blow your nose/pull your trousers up/swallow whenever you feel self-conscious. Or it may occur when you have a fleeting thought that people are looking. Or it could be when you get overwhelmed by an emotion you don't want to face (eg. self hatred) and the urge acts as a displacement activity to temporarily 'defuse' the unwanted emotion in your brain. 

These are just examples to give you the idea. The actual reason you do it will be unique to you. You may be able to identify it yourself and devise a plan to solve the issue, or you may need the guidance of a therapist to talk you through both identifying the trigger and how to deal with it more appropriately. 

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