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I finished full time work in May and now do 2.5 days a week which is great BUT I now think that because I've effectively retired at age 64 that now is the time that everything will go wrong with my health especially develop dementia.  I have had two episodes of forgetfulness that have scared me a lot as I really don't know where items were put or if I even put them somewhere!! And as I suffer from bad OCC that I do my best to control, I am convinced I have started with dementia! I thought finishing full-time work would be easy but m really finding it hard to adjust plus we need to leave our rented house for an over 50s housing development which is reinforcing my old age fears.

I know this all may seem trivial but I can't sleep properly and am terrified of ill health as above. I just feel that I want to close my eyes and never wake up again.  

 

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Hi Lancslass, 

1 hour ago, Lancslass53 said:

I now think that because I've effectively retired at age 64 that now is the time that everything will go wrong with my health especially develop dementia. 

As with all OCD, it starts with the meaning you give something. 

Retirement doesn't mean ill-health and dementia. That's the first assumption/meaning you need to correct. 

1 hour ago, Lancslass53 said:

I suffer from bad OCC that I do my best to control

What treatment have you had? Is this self 'management' (struggling through, hoping the compulsions don't wreck life too much) or are you applying CBT techniques that you've learned? 

Retirement is a wonderful time. Do you have a plan in place for all the things you want to achieve in the next decade/ two decades? :)  Part of the solution will be to change how you view retirement - from a time of illness and debility to a time for enjoyment and exploring new things. 

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I was delighted to reach retirement, initially because my wife needed help managing her family issues, and also because it provided me with the time to help her do up our house ready to downsize and move from London to here in the East Midlands, close to where I was brought up. 

We are just about settled in now, and looking forward to exploring this immediate area and for me to revisit, accompanied by my wife, some of the wonderful places in the region I knew as a boy growing up in Rugby. 

It's fine to make plans - and we have taken into account I may not be able to drive for much longer, and moved to a town with good medical resources for when needed - that's sound common sense. But our focus is for developing our garden, getting out and about as mentioned, going to the theatre, visiting Mum's hometown of Leamington - and easing into local community life. 

With any type of obsessional thinking, the way to break free is to learn and practice cognitive behavioural therapy. When new positive beneficial thoughts, using that therapy, replace the unpleasant negative obsessions and compulsions of OCD, we can enjoy life and retirement. 

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You mention three triggers to your fear: reducing your work by 50%, two episodes of forgetfulness and moving into an over 50 housing development.

Well your employer still considers you employable and now you have more spare time. Are you sure that you did not have moments of forgetfulness in the past butnow you are according them more meaningfulness? Your housing status has changed which gives you more choice. 

It’s not all gloom and doom. It is a matter of perspective. But when I turned 65 and applied for therapy I got referred to the CMHT (Community Mental Health Team) for Older Persons which as part of their standard procedure includes a test for dementia. So certain agencies can intensify a fear. I passed or failed: I did not score on the dementia scale. This despite that the official retirement age in some years time will reach 68. And who knows what the age will be in the future.

As you say in the sentence that ends with an exclamation mark:  you have convinced yourself that it’s dementia. I reckon it’s not. As said, plan to enjoy yourself on your free days.

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Thanks both for your replies.  I've tried to get to see someone for CBT but I cannot get any help from my GP.  I did see one counsellor a while ago but he told me to read the Mr Men books particularly Mr Worry!  I have decided to volunteer at my library and kick my husband up the bum and get out and about - he's a bit of a couch potato which drives me mad sometimes! 

Thanks again, sometimes you just need to be told what you already suspect is the way to go.

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Here again - been having a really hard time trying to not ruminate and test myself.  Have applied finally for therapy as deep down I know all my problems stem from ocd and acute anxiety.  Does anyone know if it's a physical disease of the brain or an imbalance in brain chemistry as I've had this since I was about eight years old? Am curious.

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It's a negative thinking distortion attributable to OCD. 

My OCD first manifest itself when I was about 10.

Causation is debatable, but the way forward is simply to accept we have it and learn how to use CBT methods to get better. 

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Hi Lancslass

There are different theories about OCD. There are three broad areas of explanation: the biomedical model believes that the cause is biological and such things as medication can help. The CBT model is that the problem is psychological and you need to develop a new thinking style. The biopsychosocial model considers that there are three levels of explanation and each interacts with the other.  So for example the social or environmental context can affect the biology of the body. My preference is for the biopsychosocial model.

 

Edited by Angst
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