battlethrough Posted July 8, 2018 Share Posted July 8, 2018 i went out last night and rowed with partner.ended up sitting by a stream with my sister.sexual thoughts were constant .at one point she leaned back on me and i moved my leg to wrap around her.i remember looking at her and my brain thinking shes hot.the thoughts felt so real.really disgusting things that i wanted to do but in the cold light of day make me sick.how can booze make me so sleezy .i honestly beleive i wanted to sleep with her Link to comment
battlethrough Posted July 8, 2018 Author Share Posted July 8, 2018 do i sound like a creep Link to comment
gingerbreadgirl Posted July 8, 2018 Share Posted July 8, 2018 Hi Battlethrough sorry to hear you've been struggling again. what do you think would be the best way to respond to this thought? Link to comment
PolarBear Posted July 8, 2018 Share Posted July 8, 2018 Same old, same old, ending with you asking for reassurance. Time for you to remember what you've been taught many times before. Link to comment
Wonderer Posted July 8, 2018 Share Posted July 8, 2018 battlethrough, can’t u see how much this is OCD considering your theme has just switched again to your sister? See how the fantasies one has been replaced by this?! U must treat it as OCD and try to get better nevermind asking if you sound like a creep!x Link to comment
Guest OCDhavenobrain Posted July 8, 2018 Share Posted July 8, 2018 (edited) "Was doing great then crash". But why did you do great? It is good that you are doing great but had you recovered? If you mean that you are in the grips of it and it gave you a short relief then there is nothing strange with "crashing". Edited July 8, 2018 by OCDhavenobrain Link to comment
taurean Posted July 9, 2018 Share Posted July 9, 2018 (edited) Sufferers with sexual preference OCD are still simply sufferers from OCD. There is no good theme of OCD. Many repulse the sufferer, make them feel dreadful as a person to have such thoughts. When we simply learn to treat them as OCD, "just my silly obsession", and don't give them belief or meaning, that's when their power begins to fade. It's connecting with them, then feeling the disorder response, thus trying compulsions to seek to ease the distress - THAT is what causes the problem. Edited July 9, 2018 by taurean Link to comment
battlethrough Posted July 9, 2018 Author Share Posted July 9, 2018 thankyou all.god i just cant beleave how i feel today.i know from an outsiders point of veiw it seems ocd but of course when it hots i think its not.because i was boozed up the thoughts seemed ok but how can i have such sexual thoughts about her.it was if i was enjoying them and didnt care.almost like i wanted something to happen.and if she had tried it on i might have.i have this sick darkness taking over again Link to comment
battlethrough Posted July 9, 2018 Author Share Posted July 9, 2018 it was as if i was really enjoying the d y.i just feel disgusted ththoughts and wanted something to happen.i know its same old.sorry.i just feel disgusted it felt ok at the time Link to comment
battlethrough Posted July 9, 2018 Author Share Posted July 9, 2018 at one point i moved my leg round.im e i did it hopeing she would lean back. ok i know what im doing.going down the rabbit whole.just scared again Quote bb Link to comment
battlethrough Posted July 9, 2018 Author Share Posted July 9, 2018 when i read other post it seems ive gone to far as its like i tried for something by moving my leg and that my brain was almost planning to make something happen.is that normal Link to comment
St Mike Posted July 9, 2018 Share Posted July 9, 2018 (edited) You are ruminating and compulsively posting your ruminations, while seeking reassurance at the same time, Battlethrough. Is this the right approach to handling your intrusive thoughts? Edited July 9, 2018 by St Mike Link to comment
Atlantis Posted July 9, 2018 Share Posted July 9, 2018 Ever thought that these just might be real time intrusive thoughts? Happening as you're innocently moving your leg? Get a grip lad you don't want to sleep with your sister. Link to comment
battlethrough Posted July 9, 2018 Author Share Posted July 9, 2018 but i feel i intended to.feel sick with it .i know that i just have to fight again.life eh Link to comment
battlethrough Posted July 9, 2018 Author Share Posted July 9, 2018 just so sad and confused.all seems real bad intent Link to comment
taurean Posted July 9, 2018 Share Posted July 9, 2018 (edited) 5 hours ago, battlethrough said: but how can i have such sexual thoughts about her. It is just the thinking distortions of OCD. The Four Steps concept may help you. These come from the book "Brainlock" by Jeffrey Schwartz. They are : relabel Refocus Re-attribute Revalue These work in addition to cognitive behavioural therapy. Once we understand that our thoughts feelings and urges are not what we want, but are caused by OCD, we are relabelling them. Then we can re-attribute them to OCD - which with this theme turns our true sexual preference core values upside down and suggests otherwise. Then we can refocus away to something else instead of connecting with the intrusions, or carrying out compulsions as a result of them. Then we revalue. I think Battlethrough that you haven't grasped the relabel step or the re-attribute step, and need to work on these. Edited July 9, 2018 by taurean Link to comment
battlethrough Posted July 9, 2018 Author Share Posted July 9, 2018 is it possible when drunk that ocd attacks because your innabitions are down.it just feels there was bad intent as if i was wanting it to happen.and only the next morning was i horrified Link to comment
taurean Posted July 9, 2018 Share Posted July 9, 2018 12 minutes ago, battlethrough said: is it possible when drunk that ocd attacks because your innabitions are down.it just feels there was bad intent as if i was wanting it to happen.and only the next morning was i horrified Being under the influence of alcohol, or stressed, weakens our resilience to OCD thoughts. But your problem is believing them, believing that you really do want to act on them - like the OCD suggests. Accepting that you don't, and it is all OCD, is the relabel aspect you need to study and grasp. It takes time to implement CBT plus the four steps. When we have retrained our belief response and behaviours, that is when the intrusions and urges will lose power and frequency, but not until then. Link to comment
battlethrough Posted July 9, 2018 Author Share Posted July 9, 2018 thanks roy.its so hard to beleave i wasnt wanting something.i will try to relable Link to comment
taurean Posted July 9, 2018 Share Posted July 9, 2018 2 minutes ago, battlethrough said: thanks roy.its so hard to beleave i wasnt wanting something.i will try to relable If I could do it, so can you. Believe me not the OCD Link to comment
battlethrough Posted July 9, 2018 Author Share Posted July 9, 2018 thanks roy.im going to realy try not to do cumpolsions and fall further down.i already feel the need to confess.seek reasurance.google etc.got to try so hard not to. Link to comment
taurean Posted July 9, 2018 Share Posted July 9, 2018 1 hour ago, battlethrough said: thanks roy.im going to realy try not to do cumpolsions and fall further down.i already feel the need to confess.seek reasurance.google etc.got to try so hard not to. You can do this. The trick is to note the urge, then gently but firmly refocus your mind elsewhere - get busy on something else beneficial. Link to comment
PolarBear Posted July 9, 2018 Share Posted July 9, 2018 This event is a carbon copy of what has happened before. This is not new. It's the same old thing. Try to see that. Link to comment
battlethrough Posted July 9, 2018 Author Share Posted July 9, 2018 i am pb i realy am.i start intensive therapy in a month.its snared me.i know its similar.it kills to know i purposly positioned my leg thinking she would lean back.i know i need help.the wait is so long.luvox was helping but i couldnt get a repeat prescription on the weekend.then this awful drunken night.theres almost no dought i had bad intention Link to comment
PolarBear Posted July 9, 2018 Share Posted July 9, 2018 There you go again. It's the third ir fourth time you mentioned moving your leg and bad intentions. It's ruminating. You are making this out to be something bad when it is not. Link to comment
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