I might have cancer- two week referral- scared!

[Angst]

Good news BelAnna. And to repeat an earlier post of mine. You did well to conquer your fear of visiting medical institutions. You stopped avoiding situations which gave rise to intense anxiety.

Could it be your fear of cancer outthrumped your fear about the vomiting bug? That your rational mind took control and decided that a visit to the GP and then to the hospital was a logical necessity.

As you say, it was the ultrasound and the interpretation of the results by experts that you have the result that the inflammation was benign.

I think that you should take this as an opportunity to press home your advantage. Deliberately expose yourself to places  where your fear stopped you from going to. Visit the GP surgery to get some information. Do a shopping trip in town. Do whatever that will build your confidence.

Edited November 8, 2018 by Angst

[Dragonfly]

Ah, Great news BelAnna!  Well done for facing your fears about going in to a doctors and hospital too Xx

[BelAnna]

2 hours ago, Angst said:

Good news BelAnna. And to repeat an earlier post of mine. You did well to conquer your fear of visiting medical institutions. You stopped avoiding situations which gave rise to intense anxiety.

Could it be your fear of cancer outthrumped your fear about the vomiting bug? That your rational mind took control and decided that a visit to the GP and then to the hospital was a logical necessity.

As you say, it was the ultrasound and the interpretation of the results by experts that you have the result that the inflammation was benign.

I think that you should take this as an opportunity to press home your advantage. Deliberately expose yourself to places  where your fear stopped you from going to. Visit the GP surgery to get some information. Do a shopping trip in town. Do whatever that will build your confidence.

Aw thank you Angst! Visiting the GP practice and hospital were both tasks on the highest level of my exposure hierarchy for contamination OCD/emetophobia so I had to really face my fears head on to cope with both situations.

My fear of cancer definitely outweighed my fear of stomach viruses so that was good!

That's a great suggestion about continuing to face anxiety-provoking situations. I might go into town tomorrow for the second time this year! 

Thank you for all of your help!

55 minutes ago, Dragonfly said:

Ah, Great news BelAnna!  Well done for facing your fears about going in to a doctors and hospital too Xx

Thanks so much for your support Dragonfly. It's felt like a really long time since my symptoms started but I'm so glad it's benign!

Edited November 8, 2018 by BelAnna

[BelAnna]

I'm going to ask my uncle who is a GP about the ultrasound findings as I was given no explanation and apparently they should normally biopsy to see why there is inflammation and thickening! Apparently the medical professional I saw to discuss the results wasn't actually a breast surgeon/doctor. G'ah, I am not going to let the anxiety get to me this time though but I might seek a second opinion if my uncle and my GP think it's sensible.

Edited November 9, 2018 by BelAnna

[Lynz]

5 hours ago, BelAnna said:

I'm going to ask my uncle who is a GP about the ultrasound findings as I was given no explanation and apparently they should normally biopsy to see why there is inflammation and thickening! Apparently the medical professional I saw to discuss the results wasn't actually a breast surgeon/doctor. G'ah, I am not going to let the anxiety get to me this time though but I might seek a second opinion if my uncle and my GP think it's sensible.

BelAnna be careful it really sounds like OCD is trying to suck you back in here.

You're still doing compulsions around this issue even though you've been given the all-clear. You've obviously still been googling hence the comment about the biopsy. Also asking your uncle would be reassurance seeking.

It's brilliant that you've been given the all-clear and I'm really happy for you, but I honestly think you should try and forget about it. Benign breast changes happen for all sorts of reasons, and it doesn't usually matter what the reason is as there is often no treatment for benign changes, hence why there's been no further investigation. I really think you should let it go now.

Edited November 9, 2018 by Lynz

[Caramoole]

44 minutes ago, Lynz said:

BelAnna be careful it really sounds like OCD is trying to suck you back in here.

You're still doing compulsions around this issue even though you've been given the all-clear. You've obviously still been googling hence the comment about the biopsy. Also asking your uncle would be reassurance seeking.

It's brilliant that you've been given the all-clear and I'm really happy for you, but I honestly think you should try and forget about it. Benign breast changes happen for all sorts of reasons, and it doesn't usually matter what the reason is as there is often no treatment for benign changes, hence why there's been no further investigation. I really think you should let it go now.

I agree with Lynz.....you're on a sticky wicket here and the OCD is gaining ground.  Stop the research Anna, nip it in the bud before it starts to build.

[BelAnna]

1 hour ago, Lynz said:

BelAnna be careful it really sounds like OCD is trying to suck you back in here.

You're still doing compulsions around this issue even though you've been given the all-clear. You've obviously still been googling hence the comment about the biopsy. Also asking your uncle would be reassurance seeking.

It's brilliant that you've been given the all-clear and I'm really happy for you, but I honestly think you should try and forget about it. Benign breast changes happen for all sorts of reasons, and it doesn't usually matter what the reason is as there is often no treatment for benign changes, hence why there's been no further investigation. I really think you should let it go now.

 

57 minutes ago, Caramoole said:

I agree with Lynz.....you're on a sticky wicket here and the OCD is gaining ground.  Stop the research Anna, nip it in the bud before it starts to build.

Thanks Lynz and Caramoole. I'm not anxious and I'm not googling/researching or anything. I'm glad that it's probably all benign.

There was some mention of inflammation, tissue thickening and lymphadenopathy so I will maybe book an appointment with my GP to find out what he thinks has caused that.

 

Edited November 9, 2018 by BelAnna

[Caramoole]

18 minutes ago, BelAnna said:

There was some mention of inflammation, tissue thickening and lymphadenopathy so I will maybe book an appointment with my GP to find out what he thinks has caused that.

Did the breast unit recommend that you should do this, that further follow up was necessary?

7 hours ago, BelAnna said:

Apparently the medical professional I saw to discuss the results wasn't actually a breast surgeon/doctor

Don't you think that the clinic used a staff member appropriately qualified to explain?  

[BelAnna]

3 hours ago, Caramoole said:

Did the breast unit recommend that you should do this, that further follow up was necessary?

Don't you think that the clinic used a staff member appropriately qualified to explain?  

Hi Caramoole,

Unfortunately she really didn't explain anything- she may have been qualified to explain but she didn't bother trying! The breast clinic didn't suggest that I had any further checks but if my lymph nodes are swollen then I will anyway! 

There have been so many times with my family where medical professionals haven't dealt with situations properly e.g. not scanning my brother's head when he had a very serious brain injury, until they noticed that his pupils were not responding equally; letting my gran fall and endure a subarachnoid haemorrhage; not caring for my other brother when he was seriously ill in hospital etc. that I really don't mind getting a second opinion and as I haven't been to the GP for four years before this I know I'm not a doctor botherer/hypochondriac! 

Edited November 9, 2018 by BelAnna

[Caramoole]

Just take care.  One of the biggest threats and influences to your life and well-being is your OCD and phobia's.  These are/have robbed you of much of your young life, your career, relationships, enjoyment of life........and yet, the information (that you call on in other areas of life, like medical facts) is there when it comes to how to approach OCD in order to overcome it but you struggle to apply this because it is painful and anxiety provoking.

I'd love to see you apply that obvious intelligence and skill to using those facts and information to help you Get better and be able to live the life you deserve

[gingerbreadgirl]

I agree you should be careful not to feed your ocd.  I do see what you're saying about doctors not always being as diligent as we'd like.  But as caramoole says ocd is the biggest threat right now to your wellbeing and you need to keep that in mind when making decisions about what to do. That's not to say that everything you do should be about ocd  - you still have your own mind and the ability to make decisions. But just be very careful not to feed that fire because it does seem like you are sliding dangerously close to that slippery slope. Make sure whatever you do it's YOU in the driving seat, NOT ocd. You have to be really honest with yourself about that. 

[BelAnna]

9 hours ago, Caramoole said:

Just take care.  One of the biggest threats and influences to your life and well-being is your OCD and phobia's.  These are/have robbed you of much of your young life, your career, relationships, enjoyment of life........and yet, the information (that you call on in other areas of life, like medical facts) is there when it comes to how to approach OCD in order to overcome it but you struggle to apply this because it is painful and anxiety provoking.

I'd love to see you apply that obvious intelligence and skill to using those facts and information to help you Get better and be able to live the life you deserve

Thank you Caramoole! You are right about the impact of OCD on my life. I have not had health anxiety for my own health before but obviously I don't want to start struggling with it either!

It's actually quite difficult to know what to do for the best in this situation. I could chalk it all up to OCD and leave it alone. I think I would do this if I had seen a consultant/surgeon (my hospital letter did say 'breast surgeon or member of her team' so I thought I would see a doctor) and if I had been given some sort of explanation for the inflammations seen on ultrasound. 

Alternatively I could ask for the explanation that I didn't receive at the breast clinic and then decide whether to leave things be or ask for a second opinion. The sonographer did say 'Oh you must have had an infection, did you have antibiotics?, because there is inflammation here' and I've not had an infection so I cannot explain that. 

I know that it's not always easy to provide answers for why some things happen and that there is sometimes just some individual variation between people's bodies. I also know that a breast surgeon can probably tell the difference between benign inflammation and malignant inflammatory breast cancer on an ultrasound but I'm just concerned about whether it was actually seen by a specialist. x

1 hour ago, gingerbreadgirl said:

I agree you should be careful not to feed your ocd.  I do see what you're saying about doctors not always being as diligent as we'd like.  But as caramoole says ocd is the biggest threat right now to your wellbeing and you need to keep that in mind when making decisions about what to do. That's not to say that everything you do should be about ocd  - you still have your own mind and the ability to make decisions. But just be very careful not to feed that fire because it does seem like you are sliding dangerously close to that slippery slope. Make sure whatever you do it's YOU in the driving seat, NOT ocd. You have to be really honest with yourself about that. 

Thanks Gingerbreadgirl, it is difficult to decide what to do. My parents think that it would be a good idea to ask for a copy of the letter that is being sent to the GP and if we still have questions then to ask my uncle and possibly go for a private ultrasound. It might not be necessary though so I'll see! I'm hoping that this situation is over by next weekend! x

Edited November 10, 2018 by BelAnna

[Angst]

It is standard practice to be sent a copy of the results of a hospital visit, so I think that your parents’ idea is a good one. Until receipt, I think that you should resist mulling over options. Do something active over the weekend which will engage your attention.

Edited November 10, 2018 by Angst

[Caramoole]

Three years ago I had to attend the Breast Clinic and have extensive mammograms, ultrasound and biopsies.  The results were given to me by a breast care Nurse, although it was explained that prior to this they had been assessed by a team of people including Consultant Radiographer, radiographers, Doctor and specialist nurses.  I'm sure yours will have been assessed similarly and that you would have been advised of any further action deemed necessary.  At the very least this information will have been sent to your GP who will recall you if necessary.  Just be cautious  

[taurean]

19 hours ago, Lynz said:

You're still doing compulsions around this issue even though you've been given the all-clear. You've obviously still been googling hence the comment about the biopsy. Also asking your uncle would be reassurance seeking.

This for me is spot on, in conjunction with what Caramoole and Angst have also said. 

Maybe the "there should be a biopsy if....." was a result of the previous re-assurance seeking, I don't know. 

But I would leave things be unless you hear something. 

From our recent experience with my wife (and I know exactly what happened as I attend her consultations with her consent given, since she is deaf)  the consultants/ medical staff may not sing out about things unless you ask them specific open questions - but that doesn't mean they aren't operating to the necessary treatment protocols. 

 

Edited November 10, 2018 by taurean

[BelAnna]

5 hours ago, Angst said:

It is standard practice to be sent a copy of the results of a hospital visit, so I think that your parents’ idea is a good one. Until receipt, I think that you should resist mulling over options. Do something active over the weekend which will engage your attention.

Thanks Angst, that's a good idea- it might be clear from the letter anyway. I will try to distract myself from thinking about it all now! 

 

5 hours ago, Caramoole said:

Three years ago I had to attend the Breast Clinic and have extensive mammograms, ultrasound and biopsies.  The results were given to me by a breast care Nurse, although it was explained that prior to this they had been assessed by a team of people including Consultant Radiographer, radiographers, Doctor and specialist nurses.  I'm sure yours will have been assessed similarly and that you would have been advised of any further action deemed necessary.  At the very least this information will have been sent to your GP who will recall you if necessary.  Just be cautious  

I'm sorry to hear that Caramoole, I hope you are OK now. I was hoping to see a doctor at the breast clinic and the nurse I saw was not particularly helpful. I'm trying to be cautious not to let my OCD in here but equally I have to consider whether there is any reasonable doubt over the diagnosis too. If I had a history of health anxiety then I would label it as 'health anxiety' but I don't and I'm not sure that it is that. x

 

4 hours ago, taurean said:

This for me is spot on, in conjunction with what Caramoole and Angst have also said. 

Maybe the "there should be a biopsy if....." was a result of the previous re-assurance seeking, I don't know. 

But I would leave things be unless you hear something. 

From our recent experience with my wife (and I know exactly what happened as I attend her consultations with her consent given, since she is deaf)  the consultants/ medical staff may not sing out about things unless you ask them specific open questions - but that doesn't mean they aren't operating to the necessary treatment protocols. 

 

Thanks Roy, that might well be the case. I think that I just have some unanswered questions about the presence of inflammation that was seen on the ultrasound and about why there was some mention of lymphadenitis without an infection. I'll just try to carry on as normal at the moment and wait until the GP has the breast clinic letter. 

 

xx

Edited November 10, 2018 by BelAnna

[Caramoole]

28 minutes ago, BelAnna said:

I was hoping to see a doctor at the breast clinic and the nurse I saw was not particularly helpful. I'm trying to be cautious not to let my OCD in here but equally I have to consider whether there is any reasonable doubt over the diagnosis too. If I had a history of health anxiety then I would label it as 'health anxiety' but I don't and I'm not sure that it is that

It is probably standard procedure that it is the role of the Breast Care Nurse and unless there was good reason otherwise, they would have no reason to change this.  The only time I saw a Doctor, who was a Consultant Radiologist, was prior to the investigations where he went through the original mammogram to show me the problem and explain their concerns.

35 minutes ago, BelAnna said:

If I had a history of health anxiety then I would label it as 'health anxiety' but I don't and I'm not sure that it is that

You do have a history of OCD, anxiety, doubt and the need for certainty by researching facts....something provoked even by a real life event is likely to provoke that obsessive response.

[BelAnna]

18 hours ago, Caramoole said:

It is probably standard procedure that it is the role of the Breast Care Nurse and unless there was good reason otherwise, they would have no reason to change this.  The only time I saw a Doctor, who was a Consultant Radiologist, was prior to the investigations where he went through the original mammogram to show me the problem and explain their concerns.

You do have a history of OCD, anxiety, doubt and the need for certainty by researching facts....something provoked even by a real life event is likely to provoke that obsessive response.

Thanks Caramoole. I think that most of the clinic was covered by doctors and a breast surgeon- I know that my Mum saw a breast surgeon last year when she had a benign condition that appeared like IBC. I'm so sorry you've been ill. 

I am trying to keep in mind that my anxiety over this may be just that. I'm hopeful that the letter to the GP will explain what was found and how they know it is benign. 

[freya196]

Hi all, 

I've been to my appointment today and it was super scary especially having themes surrounding my health/health of family and HOCD!! But i got through it and my doctor is pretty sure it's not cancer, there's no lump or symptoms that correlate properly with typical cancer symptoms but i'm being sent for an ultrasound anyway. Thanks for having such a supportive thread! 

[Emsie]

8 minutes ago, freya196 said:

Hi all, 

I've been to my appointment today and it was super scary especially having themes surrounding my health/health of family and HOCD!! But i got through it and my doctor is pretty sure it's not cancer, there's no lump or symptoms that correlate properly with typical cancer symptoms but i'm being sent for an ultrasound anyway. Thanks for having such a supportive thread! 

That’s really good news Freya. Well done for getting through today. 

[BelAnna]

Hi Freya, 

Well done for being so brave- that's brilliant! Have you been referred under the two-week rule to a one-stop clinic too? That's great that the GP thinks that it should be ok- do hold onto that if the panic creeps in over the next few days!