OCD relapse

[malina]

Hi guys,

I’m just curious how many of you have gone through relapses in your OCD and how you handle it? I battled a lot with self harm obsessions 10 years ago, I have never self harmed but I had to seek help because I felt so lost and out of control. I was then diagnosed with OCD and with treatment those thoughts subsided. I’ve had issues with anxiety since then but have been able to manage it. Now, for some reason, it has come up again. I posted recently about experiencing more physical sensations of anxiety and since I recognised them as anxiety, they have completely disappeared. But now the self harm thoughts are back, not as strong as they were, but they are making me unhappy. I have started CBT and think that my therapist will be great, but I’m feeling disappointed and uncertain about the future now that this problem is back. I just have fears that CBT won’t help and that I’ll be stuck like this forever, I know these fears are illogical but they are there. So I just wondered if anyone could share some of their own experiences? Thanks guys, you’re seriously very helpful!

[Symps07]

Hi Malina,

I had thoughts POCD for 11 years before I saw a CBT therapist and got help and finally overcame this obsession.

3 years later I started to get thoughts regarding religion and going to hell and it really affected me. I didn't even realise it was OCD until I actually found this website and read about rumination.

I think it's sometimes hard to deal with the 'scope' of OCD. The different compulsions and ways that it can effect you and just remember that it is the same issue just coming from a different angle.

I still get POCD thoughts now and again, but because I don't engage with them and just let the thoughts go. They don't have the same impact they once had and disappear almost as quickly as they appear.

I wouldn't worry to much about being 'stuck like this', this is the kind of anxiety that fuels OCD. I believe that by doing your CBT and taking everyday one day at a time, you will soon see a reduction in these thoughts you are having and will be on your way to overcoming your OCD!

Best of luck!
 

Symps

 

[malina]

1 hour ago, Symps07 said:

Hi Malina,

I had thoughts POCD for 11 years before I saw a CBT therapist and got help and finally overcame this obsession.

3 years later I started to get thoughts regarding religion and going to hell and it really affected me. I didn't even realise it was OCD until I actually found this website and read about rumination.

I think it's sometimes hard to deal with the 'scope' of OCD. The different compulsions and ways that it can effect you and just remember that it is the same issue just coming from a different angle.

I still get POCD thoughts now and again, but because I don't engage with them and just let the thoughts go. They don't have the same impact they once had and disappear almost as quickly as they appear.

I wouldn't worry to much about being 'stuck like this', this is the kind of anxiety that fuels OCD. I believe that by doing your CBT and taking everyday one day at a time, you will soon see a reduction in these thoughts you are having and will be on your way to overcoming your OCD!

Best of luck!
 

Symps

 

Hi Symps, I totally relate I’ve had fears about hell too! I guess I’m just disappointed because I was in the place that you describe - I got the thoughts but didn’t engage with them and they went away quickly. Somehow I have been engaging a lot with them lately and I don’t know why! I guess it’s unhelpful to try and think about why, but I am just afraid. I went through so much when I was younger and I don’t want it to happen again. I appreciate your response, it’s comforting to know about others who experience what you do. You’re absolutely right that it’s hard to even understand the scope of OCD, it has never really gone away but has been changing form and now I’m back at the most frightening manifestation of it.

 

[dksea]

3 hours ago, malina said:

I’m just curious how many of you have gone through relapses in your OCD and how you handle it?

I'd wager basically everyone who has battled OCD and worked on recovery has had relapses at one point or another.  Unfortunately OCD is not (yet at least) something we can completely cure.  Stress, illness, etc. can all affect our minds and bodies and that can lead to OCD relapses.  The way to handle it is just like handling OCD the first time, CBT.  Avoid compulsions, recognizing the obsessions for what they are, and do your best not to get trapped in the OCD loop.  Sorry it can't be something more profound or anything, but thats the reality of the OCD for now at least.

 

3 hours ago, malina said:

but I’m feeling disappointed and uncertain about the future now that this problem is back. I just have fears that CBT won’t help and that I’ll be stuck like this forever, I

Its totally understandable to feel disappointment and uncertainty, we obviously don't enjoy living with OCD.  But its the nature of a chronic condition like OCD that even in recovery you'll probably have flareups now and again.  The good news is history shows that CBT DOES work and you can get back to a good place just like you did before.  I would love to tell you that you'll never experience OCD again after this time, but I can't promise that.  Is it possible? Sure, but its also possible you'll win the lottery and become a millionaire.  Best not to assume that outcome   So do your best to apply the CBT again to beat back the OCD.  You'll get better and better at it and before long you'll be an expert at handling flareups too.  I know I'm much better at dealing with my OCD now than I was 25 years ago when it first started.  I think you'll find the same with other sufferers on here who have come to tame their OCD over time as well.

[paradoxer]

7 hours ago, Symps07 said:

I wouldn't worry to much about being 'stuck like this', this is the kind of anxiety that fuels OCD. I believe that by doing your CBT and taking everyday one day at a time, you will soon see a reduction in these thoughts you are having and will be on your way to overcoming your OCD!
 

 

Yes, focusing inordinately on wanting OCD to go away, actually can fuel the disorder ... since it's too desperate - just what OCD loves. Implementing tools, and as you point out, taking a day a a time, is the way forward. 

[malina]

Your wise words really help! I'm 31 and have been dealing with OCD for as long during my life as I can remember, but I didn't know that it was OCD or that I was anxious or that it was anything mental health related. I only got diagnosed 10 years ago and I have learned SO MUCH. I guess I've just got to be positive and think about all of the new things that I'll learn and how they will help my coping in years to come. 

[gingerbreadgirl]

Hi Malina

I've had a bad relapse this last year having been pretty much OK for quite some time before that.  I too have had fears that I would be stuck like this forever, and that all the strategies I'd used before wouldn't work.  I have worked through them though and generally OCD-wise I am in a pretty good place now, I've got most of my compulsions right down and I don't ruminate too much and the fears are held at bay.  Basically I had to work the same strategies I had before, but to be much more proactive at welcoming the thoughts in and exposing myself to the fears.  

You have learned a lot as you say, and you can use those strategies this time as you have before, even if you have to maybe attack them from a slightly different angle or find new ways of processing them.  The general principles are the same as they were and you can beat this. 

Hope you're feeling better really soon xx