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Tinnitus and anxiety


Guest Paul92

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Hi,

Not sure if this is OCD related.

Over the weekend I played a couple of gigs with my band. Usually, after we have finished playing, my ears will ring for the remainder of the night and it will stop by the end of the next day. However, now it is Wednesday and they are still ringing.

I can't hear the ringing when I am out and about, at work or wherever. I can only hear it when I'm at home on my own, in a silent room, like my bedroom when I am going to bed. I can maybe hear it a little when the TV is on low.

I have found that if I put my fingers in my ears I can hear it pretty much any time.

I have also found that, if I put ear plugs in, or sit in absolute silence, the ringing goes away on its own after a few minutes. It comes back again if I turn on the TV or some sort of sounds makes it worse.

I know this, then, shouldn't be a great tragedy.

But I'm an absolute wreck about it. I know there is no cure and I just can't stop thinking about it and worrying that this is what the rest of my life will be like now.

In the past when I have had similar health worries, I have always reacted in the same way.

In the summer, I had a heart scare and I just wanted to stay in bed all day, didn't want to see anyone or eat anything. I had that persistent black cloud over my head, and a sense of impending doom. I have had it a few times with new worries.

But having been reading tinnitus forums and general awareness about the condition, there are thousands who say they still struggle with it years later and it still causes them anxiety.

Will this feeling ever pass? Will I be able to forget about it? Is it just my OCD brain latching onto something again, and will it get bored eventually? I really don't know this time.

I just feel really anxious and nauseous. I always get this feeling when I get a worry and think that things are never going to be the same... and it always happens just as I find myself feeling better and getting into a routine in which I am relatively stable and happy.

Sorry for rambling, but I live alone and have nobody to talk to. Again, I'm scared.

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I have tinnitus in my right ear caused by an ear infection that was not diagnosed for years. One of the standard treatments for tinnitus is CBT for tinnitus which is remarkably similar to CBT for OCD. Do not focus on the sounds. When I focus my attention on my tinnitus it occupies my mind so I don’t. Habituate - get used to - to the thoughts or sounds be they imagined or real.

This is not easy but don’t think about it and DO NOT test whether you have tinnitus or not. This has become a compulsion for you.

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Hi Angst,

Thank you for your reply.

I always struggle with this sort of advice (I'm not criticising you at all, I really appreciate your help and support), I just never have been able to just not focus on something. It's pretty much impossible for me.

I read a book recently about living in the now. And how that can conquer all anxiety. But I can do this for about 30 seconds before I'm thinking again.

Sorry to ask but, how loud is your tinnitus? Does it affect you daily?

At the moment, I can't hear it when I'm not at home. I dread being at home at the moment. I dread being in my bedroom. I dread the thought of going to bed. It honestly turns my stomach. I've just visited my parents and drove all the way back crying to myself. I'm just sick of everything... as if OCD wasn't enough, now I have this for the rest of my life. Two of the most debilitating things you can have.

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8 hours ago, Paul92 said:

But having been reading tinnitus forums and general awareness about the condition, there are thousands who say they still struggle with it years later and it still causes them anxiety.

Will this feeling ever pass? Will I be able to forget about it? Is it just my OCD brain latching onto something again, and will it get bored eventually? I really don't know this time.

Sorry to hear you are having trouble Paul, it sounds very frustrating.

First thing I would recommend is going to an audiologist.  Researching on the internet is a great way to scare yourself (first hand experience!) but talking to an actual doctor will help you get the answers you need.  I also wouldn't perform anymore if possible until you have seen an ear doctor.  At the very least you should be using some high quality ear plugs to help you prevent any further damage.

Second, if silence at night is an issue, consider a white noise or ambient sound (rain fall, forest noises, etc) app or device.

Third, again going back to what I alluded to in the first point, be careful about getting advice/information from the internet (ironic given thats what this site is).  Very often the people who have little/no problems with an issue aren't going to spend much if any time talking about it.  Tinnitus forums are therefore, most likely to be filled with the people having the most problems even if they are a tiny minority.  Now that doesn't mean there problems aren't real or worthy of support, but it does give you a false impression of what the future might hold for you.  My own father has had tinnitus issues off and on for years, but manages to live a normal and enjoyable life, just as many OCD sufferers do as well.

Fourth, continuing on from above, its understandable and relatable to catastrophize, OCD sufferers often do, but that doesn't mean the worst case scenario is what you are dealing with or that nothing can be done for your situation.  Do your best to seek medical advice, take steps to protect your hearing and go from there, one step at a time.

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Thank you for your reply. 

The thing is, it's not that delibilitating. I don't hear it through the day and at night it dies down. I only hear it when I go from a noisy environment into a quiet one. 

But this still throws me into a real panic. Is this a normal reaction? 

It most likely won't ever go away. There's a chance it will get worse. I'll have to do battle with it every single day. 

I just feel numb. I've felt like this before but usually it goes when the issue is resolved. Obviously, this can't really be solved. 

I feel sick to my stomach. I can't sleep. I feel numb. I lose interest in everything. I can't find any sort of comfort. It's hard to describe, but my life feels like there is no atmosphere anywhere. 

I always freak out like this. I don't even know what help I can get. Should I call Samaritans or what? 

I'm not even registered at a local doctors and the waiting times are weeks.. But they can't do anything anyway! 

Edited by Paul92
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I first realised that I had tinnitus over twenty years ago. In the dead of night I heard a truck revving up. It went on and on. So I got dressed to confront the driver. But there was no truck and no driver. That and other experiences lead me to the conclusion that I had tinnitus. 

It does not adversely affect my life. Sometimes I will play music at night.

A visit to an audiologist is advisable. If you register with with a GP they might refer your to an ENT specialist. As I said I had an undiagnosed ear infection that caused my tinnitus. After years and some pressure I saw an ENT consultant and had two operations to clear the infection which involved a minute operation to replace the hearing bones. The smallest bones in the body. The infection had devastated the hearing bones and would have spread to another part of the ear which would have affected balance.

I say this not to frightened you but to say that visiting an audiologist and GP would be a good idea. The audiological test will check your hearing and a competent technician will advise on what to do. Certain surgical interventions at certain times will be able to cure tinnitus. It depends on various factors. In my case after the operations my hearing improved a great but I still have tinnitus. In other cases the procedure can cure tinnitus.

You are exaggerating and catastrophising. But as said, medical and audiological advice would be the rational thing to do. Apart from anything else it would be good sense to register with a GP.

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Thanks again for your reply.

I will try and get booked in with a doctor at some point.

I really need help. I just can't function. I feel constantly nervous and sick. I can't eat or anything.

I just come home from work and laid in my bedroom in the quiet just listening to the tinnitus. I get so emotional. I couldn't help but just cry.. when I get like this all I want to do is go and hug my parents. That sounds ridiculous coming from a 26 year old I know... but I'm in a real state. To the point where I am considering calling Samaritans just for someone to talk to.

A part me knows this isn't a normal reaction. But I get so upset by things like this. The prospect that for the rest of my life I will have to do battle and listen to it every single night turns my stomach... I just know it is going to affect how I sleep and I already sleep terribly. Everything is getting too much, it really really is.

I know these are the consequences of me not protecting my ears. But I'm still scared.

Can you hear your tinnitus in day to day activities? I can't, as I say, it's only when I enter a silent room... so why am I freaking out so much? Why am I in this state? Is this normal? Someone please help me... is there anyone I can ring, like a mental health team? I'm in absolute meltdown

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Its ok, just take some time to slow your breathing. Try breathing in to the count of five and breathing out to the count of seven to calm your nervous system.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting a hug or needing someone to talk to, it's perfectly natural and good thing to do when you are in a state of stress. The Samaritans are there for anyone needing to talk, not just those thinking of suicide, so it's ok to call them.

I have mild tinnitus and it caused me a lot of stress at first but now I don't notice it, and there is no guarantee that yours will not go away on its own anyway. 

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Hi Wren, thank you for taking the time to write to me.

I'm trying breathing exercises, but my stomach feels really tight. It feels really strange.

How did you/do you find when you can hear your tinnitus? At first, was you listening for it a lot? I just don't see how I will be able to let it.

I'm genuinely crying while I type this. I've had to turn my TV off because I feel like it was making it worse and I could hear all sorts of weird sounds. But I used to find comfort in my TV and I would look forward to coming home and watching Netflix or whatever.

I've been like this since Monday and there is no feeling at all that it will pass. It's been the hardest thing ever getting out of bed in a morning and dragging myself to work.

I'm crying at everything. I think of my parents, I cry. I think of a girl that I like, I cry. I think of the summer and the things I did with my dad, and I just cry,. I feel like I'll never have that again... Why am I like this? Why? This isn't normal is it?

My dad suffers from anxiety issues. He had a breakdown in the summer and I helped him through it. He's also mentioned in the past that he has tinnitus and it flares up really badly sometimes. But I don't want to tell him about all this because 1) he's always warned me about getting tinnitus from playing in a band, and obviously I was a little know-it-all and 2) he has enough issues on his plate without worrying about me.

I think I will ring Samaritans...

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When my tinnitus first started I couldn't listen to it at all without panicking, so I had to have constant noise from music or tv etc. Like you I was shocked at how devastated and overwhelmed I was about it, seemingly out of all proportion, but in reality the tinnitus was just a trigger for my anxiety, and once I dealt with the anxiety I no longer cared about the tinnitus. I think the tinnitus just triggered a feeling of being trapped because I couldn't escape from it, so it started a spiral of ever increasing anxiety, but you can, like I have, break that cycle and be ok again. It's certainly not a life sentence. 

Ring the Samaritans, it's what they are there for. 

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Hi again,

I phoned them but I had to hang up not long afterwards. The guy on the phone just kept saying "ok". So I was talking to myself. I know, they can't do much else and they aren't supposed to but it was hard work.

I understand what you are saying. It might sound weird, but i can imagine how my dad will react to hearing his tinnitus. He'd just think, ah that's the tinnitus, and then carry on with whatever he's doing. I don't know how it affects him sleeping or whatever, but he has a lot of flexibility in his sleep. He can get up and go to work pretty much whenever he wants. I'm up at half 6 every morning. But I have been reading about tinnitus online and there are some horror stories that put the fear of God into me.

I bought my own home in September of this year so now I have a mortgage on my shoulders. I have work due in in University in a couple of weeks (I study distance while working). It all feels too much. Especially considering I never sleep well anyway and haven't done for years.

The thought of having to make lifestyle changes really worries me. I like my routine..

I'm just preying that this sickening feeling will at least pass at some point so I can try and make sense of it all. It HAS to be an irrational reaction. I've never cried so much, never wanted to curl up in a ball as much, never felt as sick... everything has lost colour, does that make sense at all?

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If you want, you can call the Samaritans back and speak to a different person.

It sounds like you have got a new responsibility to deal with and a busy life, so maybe the tinnitus has just triggered some anxiety and stress which is perfectably understandable.  Anxiety is a funny thing - it's kind of like an autocatalytic reaction - so it ends up being out of proportion to the original trigger.  Try the breathing thing again, and certainly stop googling! Only the horror stories are the ones that get written about, not the vast majority of people's actual experience which is much more mundane.  

You don't need to make any changes to your routine, I sometimes listen to white noise on my phone as I fall asleep, that's all, but I rarely even bother with that now. 

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Thank you so much Wren for your reply, honestly at this point tonight, I can't put a price on it. I'm so grateful.

I'll try and stop Googling.. but sometimes it helps if I can get an idea of what is even going on. I've just opened up to a friend and he's told me he has it too. But he says you get used to it. He says he's in his kitchen, cleaning his bike and it's silent, he can hear it, but only because I've brought the subject up! But then I think it mine just a lot louder than his? He says sometimes when he's trying to sleep it's all that he can hear, but he never really lets it affect his life.

I don't know how I can get in such a state. It's like my system gets shocked and every worse case scenario is real. I've just had the biggest cry ever and I feel a bit better.

I just want to get to a state where if I hear the tinnitus, I can just acknowledge it and then carry on. Just ackowledge for a split second and then gone. Is this where you are at with it?

 

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I shock myself at my over reactions sometimes, but it's often a case of the straw that broke the camels back and the feelings need to come out somehow, and they do always pass. Crying is a great way to relieve tension so you can move on, there's no shame in it, it's just a natural and helpful human reaction. 

 I barely register my tinnitus now, it's just one of those things and not a problem, and the vast majority of time I forget about it. I think it is very common and yours could go away anyway, sometimes it's just due to a cold or stress. But do make a doctors appointment when you can.

 

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Thank you, I will make an appointment for as soon as I can.

You give me hope that I'll be able to get my marbles back at least. But even writing this, I have my TV on, and I can hear my tinnitus above it slightly. And I think, what if I can't ever get used to it or not notice it. But is that OCD? Asking what if, what if, what if?

Just regarding the reactions, does anyone think it is OCD linked? Like catastrophising everything?

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12 hours ago, Paul92 said:

The thing is, it's not that delibilitating. I don't hear it through the day and at night it dies down. I only hear it when I go from a noisy environment into a quiet one. 

But this still throws me into a real panic. Is this a normal reaction? 

It most likely won't ever go away. There's a chance it will get worse. I'll have to do battle with it every single day. 

I just feel numb. I've felt like this before but usually it goes when the issue is resolved. Obviously, this can't really be solved. 

I feel sick to my stomach. I can't sleep. I feel numb. I lose interest in everything. I can't find any sort of comfort. It's hard to describe, but my life feels like there is no atmosphere anywhere. 

I always freak out like this. I don't even know what help I can get. Should I call Samaritans or what? 

I'm not even registered at a local doctors and the waiting times are weeks.. But they can't do anything anyway! 

 

3 hours ago, Paul92 said:

Just regarding the reactions, does anyone think it is OCD linked? Like catastrophising everything?

Based on your description I'd say it absolutely sounds like an OCD type of reaction.  I think a non-sufferer might be annoyed/dissapointed/frustrated by the symptoms but the level to which it is effecting you, feeling so depressed and out of sorts is not at all within the reasonable reaction to something like this.  And yeah, you are very much catastrophizing :)

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7 hours ago, dksea said:

 

Based on your description I'd say it absolutely sounds like an OCD type of reaction.  I think a non-sufferer might be annoyed/dissapointed/frustrated by the symptoms but the level to which it is effecting you, feeling so depressed and out of sorts is not at all within the reasonable reaction to something like this.  And yeah, you are very much catastrophizing :)

See I know this but when you are in the middle of it, it's hard to see a way out of it. 

 

I find it so difficult to just forget about it. Like just not check for it.

 

I feel slightly better this morning but this might be something to do with the weather been quite nice, I'd not seen any sunlight for 5 days before this mornjng

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Hi Paul,

I went through what your going through with tinnitus. I went to see my gp, who knows all about my OCD. For me it was simply a large build up of wax, 2 weeks of olive oil and it went away. I know I was lucky.

I found the same with the samaritans, just an ok know again. Didn't help me.

The OCD UK phone line helps. I have spoken to Ashley when I have been in quite serious situation and he was good to chat to.

 

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Hi Bodger, thanks. 

I'm feeling a tiny bit better today. I'm on a my work's Christmas night out currently and all I can think about is going home and facing the noise. It honestly turns my stomach. It makes me so anxious and I feel sick. 

Is this going to pass? Just fed up. The thought of having this forever terrifies me. Last night I just cried and cried and cried. 

My mate told me he has tinnitus and he can hear it when he's in a quiet place or going to sleep. But he doesn't really care about it. Why can't I just have that mindset? 

 

Should I say, what do I need to do? 

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I would say make an appointment with your GP. You can buy olive oil drops (exactly what I used) without a prescription, at any pharmacy.

Why not ask in the pharmacy tomorrow (as I'm no doctor), then you could at least try it. For me it took about 2 weeks using twice a day. Maybe I was lucky I don't know, only saying what worked for me.

Fingers crossed.

 

 

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Bodger, I could give it a go yes, thanks for the tip :)

Still in meltdown. I can't even describe how I feel. I just don't feel any emotions, apart from real hopelessness. Just really tense and can't bring myself to eat anything.. I've had one meal today. The issue is, weight flies off me and when I lose weight, people notice and I look ill. I'm just not hungry, and I can't bear the thought of cooking a meal. I've laid on my sofa all night with my earphones in trying to mask these stupids sounds in my head.

Is this anxiety ever going to die down?

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16 hours ago, Paul92 said:

Still in meltdown. I can't even describe how I feel. I just don't feel any emotions, apart from real hopelessness. Just really tense and can't bring myself to eat anything.. I've had one meal today. The issue is, weight flies off me and when I lose weight, people notice and I look ill. I'm just not hungry, and I can't bear the thought of cooking a meal. I've laid on my sofa all night with my earphones in trying to mask these stupids sounds in my head.

Is this anxiety ever going to die down?

The anxiety will die down but it'll help if you take steps to help move yourself in a positive direction.  Laying around doing nothing is generally a bad idea, it leaves you with more time to focus on your anxiety.  It helps to keep busy, and it doesn't have to be anything intense either.  A hobby, an activity, going for a walk, etc.  Lots of things you can do.  Also eating well will help you feel better.  The loss of appetite can be frustrating but its generally a good idea to make sure you eat on a regular basis, even if you don't feel great about it.  It will help your body feel physically better which in turn helps your mental health.  Its one of those times where you just have to fake it til you make it.  Sometimes just going through the motions will help you get to the point where you feel better again.

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