Becoming obsessed with thoughts - things getting worse (Merged Thread)

[Orwell1984]

Phil buy yourself Jeffrey Schwartz’s ‘Brain Lock’. It keeps your recovery simple which is much needed when your brain is in full on analysis mode and is easy to remember to implement.

When I was at my wits end with ocd, I had so many ocd help books and the methods within seemed to contradict each other. I was frightened of using Jeffrey schwartz’s 4 steps method in ‘Brain Lock’ in case I was subtly ‘reassuring’ myself, ie doing mental compulsions to avoid the obsession (which would make ocd worse). I took the leap of faith that the 4 steps including using distraction techniques and relabelling fears as ‘just ocd’ were not compulsions and I became so so so much better within 3 months. I was practically bed bound at the beginning and crying all the time as well as analysing, praying, you name it. So do yourself a big favour and buy it online. It’s probably on ebooks or kindle as well 

Edited April 1, 2019 by Orwell1984

[Guest Phil10]

6 minutes ago, Orwell1984 said:

Phil buy yourself Jeffrey Schwartz’s ‘Brain Lock’. It keeps your recovery simple which is much needed when your brain is in full on analysis mode and is easy to remember to implement.

When I was at my wits end with ocd, I had so many ocd help books and the methods within seemed to contradict each other. I was frightened of using Jeffrey schwartz’s 4 steps method in ‘Brain Lock’ in case I was subtly ‘reassuring’ myself, ie doing mental compulsions to avoid the obsession (which would make ocd worse). I took the leap of faith that the 4 steps including using distraction techniques and relabelling fears as ‘just ocd’ were not compulsions and I became so so so much better within 3 months. I was practically bed bound at the beginning and crying all the time as well as analysing, praying, you name it. So do yourself a big favour and buy it online. It’s probably on ebooks or kindle as well 

Yes I see it on iTunes I will have a look 

[Guest Phil10]

The book is ok bit similar to break free from your ocd seems to tap more into the physiology of ocd though. 

[taurean]

46 minutes ago, Phil10 said:

So my question is what can you do when ocd is very severe and as pointed out I can’t have meds? 

The Four Steps really will help you. 

The more you apply these, and refocus away from your obsessional thoughts, the weaker they will become. 

But the key thing would be to really get to grips with the cognitive understanding of how OCD works. Only when this is truly understood can we work through successful exposure and response prevention. And as I know only too well, ERP will not work unless we apply this knowledge and accept our issues are attributable to a false exaggerated or revulsive OCD core belief. 

I truly believe, as one who has successfully gone through this process, that we need to disarm our obsessions through ERP in order to recover from OCD. Otherwise they are latent, not overcome, and will keep flaring up. 

But we mustn't separate out the ERP from the rest of CBT - all elements of the therapy need to be worked in order for that element to work. 

What can also help is learning how to slip into a state of mindfulness. I learned how to best do this to aid my OCD recovery from an excellent therapist, and from a workbook called "The mindfulness workbook for OCD" which teams up CBT and mindfulness, and is available in e-book and hard copy. 

It is written by Jon Herschfield and Tom Corby. 

How can mindfulness help? Well, as I now understand from the book and therapy, in a true state of mindfulness our mind has shifted from the active "doing" part of the brain - where all our obsessing and compulsing takes place - to the benign "just being" part of the brain where we are able to live and focus in the present in the moment with a calm mind. 

It works brilliantly for me. I worked through CBT, The Four Steps, and the mindfulness and have been really well now for two years. 

[Guest Phil10]

Yes you are correct I need a better understanding of the ocd becuase when it comes my Brain believes it. The mindfulness may help too.

Edited April 1, 2019 by Phil10

[PolarBear]

2 hours ago, Phil10 said:

You are correct they are strong has it been proven before people’s obsessions don’t work? Perhaps I don’t understand ocd well given I only suffered mild hand washing for 15 years and I was able to mostly ignore it due to other anxiety. It’s only been in the past 3 years I have realised how bad ocd can be. I was quite ignorant to it thinking it can only make you check the odd door is locked or hand washing.

Rock bottom yes I have maybe already been there when I spend all day worrying. Lately I’ve had stuff like sore stomachs brought on by the anxiety and ocd. 

These existance and contamination worries I have learnt are hard to let go of. It’s hard to say they are lies when I believe them. I have all these ocd rules but I am finding In the real world it’s hard to meet these standards. So my question is what can you do when ocd is very severe and as pointed out I can’t have meds? 

We've told you over and over, Phil. You need to slow down snd stop your compulsions and you need to challenge your OCD through ERP.

Case in point: you went to the bathroom and then took a shower. Completely unnecessary. Showering was a compulsion.

[dksea]

5 hours ago, Phil10 said:

You are correct they are strong has it been proven before people’s obsessions don’t work?

Yes, centuries of experience with OCD and decades of study have demonstrated that compulsions do not work when it comes to OCD.

 

5 hours ago, Phil10 said:

Perhaps I don’t understand ocd well given I only suffered mild hand washing for 15 years and I was able to mostly ignore it due to other anxiety. It’s only been in the past 3 years I have realised how bad ocd can be. I was quite ignorant to it thinking it can only make you check the odd door is locked or hand washing.

Compulsions provide temporary relief (sometimes) at the expense of long term damage.  They strengthen the minds association of intrusive thoughts with meaning and thus make the sufferer more and more likely to believe later intrusive thoughts.  Its kinda like eating donuts everyday for breakfast.  Sure you might enjoy the donut at the time, but in the long run you'll gain weight and lose health.

[Guest Phil10]

So the situation today is I touched the towel rail and I touched a tiny bit of my phone and drawer handle I don’t feel ready to touch the whole phone or every surface after a towel has been placed there. I tried to challenge the thoughts but I am struggling I mean I did nothing different other than wipe my backside but that was after I put the towel back so I don’t understand why my head is fixated on this? The thought pops into my head “the towel rail is as dirty as my old bathroom” and then I worry about dirty laundry germs simply becuase I had these thoughts again there is no evidence to them it’s a thought I had and my head buys into some how it can be dirty despite it not being possible? How can I fix this?

I thought by touching a small bit of my phone atleast the ocd can’t fully win. 

Edited April 2, 2019 by Phil10

[Guest Phil10]

When my partners towels are on the rail I take a new towel anyway so perhaps I shall have to do the same when my towel goes on and just deal with it that way it is annoying as it’s another routine like when I use two strimmers on the back garden. However a one of them isn’t working right so I had to put the new one closer to the bins than usual. 

My fear is if I touch my phone after putting a towel on the rail it will have dirty laundry germs on it. It doesn’t make sense these thought but most of my thoughts are like this becuase I had this thought it must be true. I tried to say well I put a finger on my phone today to test it and never worried but but I worry putting my whole hand on the phone would cause distress

I fear once the “seed” or thought has been planted it’s hard to shift if I end up believing something is contaminated it’s hard to let go

Edited April 2, 2019 by Phil10

[Guest Phil10]

Also frustratingly my partner touched my bags of new clothes for my stag night after going to the toilet my head says I may smell of toilet germs. So basically I worried about the shirts so my ocd will make me worry that both stag and wedding I will worry about toilet germs. I had a thought I peed myself with the shirts so basically the ocd is so intense that I worry not that I am dirty but I smell? This is my latest fix the pressure of a wedding is causing increased perfectionism?

[Angst]

There is a debate about the extreme approach on the forum. And I think it is perfectly suited to contamination themes. Do not wash and go out in those shirts.As I said previously many of your advisors are assisted by taking prescribed drugs to lower anxiety so it might be more onerous for you. But if you can manage it it will help.

Edited April 2, 2019 by Angst

[Guest Phil10]

11 minutes ago, Angst said:

There is a debate about the extreme approach on the forum. And I think it is perfectly suited to contamination themes. Do not wash and go out in those shirts.As I said previously many of your advisors are assisted by taking prescribed drugs to lower anxiety so it might be more onerous for you. But if you can manage it it will help.

So basically I should wear the shirts and the clothes and go out without putting them in the washing machine or anything like that? The thoughts that I stink of pee ect worries will come. With the wedding the theme of my ocd is smelling. I believe the fact it’s a big event it propelling my ocd. 

[Angst]

Yes. Go out tonight with your girlfriend. Do not wash and wear one of the shirts. Yes the thoughts of pee will come. The idea is that you ride out these thoughts and in time they will stop. 

Edited April 2, 2019 by Angst

[Guest Phil10]

6 minutes ago, Angst said:

Yes. Go out tonight with your girlfriend. Do not wash and wear one of the shirts. Yes the thoughts of pee will come. The idea is that you ride out these thoughts and in time they will stop. 

Well it’s not tonight it’s wedding shirts and also stag night stuff so I can’t go tonight but as you can see the anxiety is higher for big events? 

[Angst]

Wear one of the stag night clothes and go out tonight.

[Guest Phil10]

9 minutes ago, Angst said:

Wear one of the stag night clothes and go out tonight.

I am a bit ocd in that the clothes have to be new for my stag night however what benefit would it be to wear them tonight? I may end up feeling anxious on the stag night? Also I am worried about using the towel rail I tried touching a small piece of my phone and a handle but that was the best I could do. 

[Angst]

Ignore that thought about being new. Ignore that future feeling. Go out wearing an item for the stag tonight. Not sure if you are a troll or genuine? Who knows? But you have captured new posts by adding a new comment like you last sentence to accomplish long, very long threads. Some of the longest that I have ever seen. Are  you a troll?

Edited April 2, 2019 by Angst

[Guest OCDhavenobrain]

I do agree that you need to atleast give it a try Phil. You have to know by now that not doing compulsions will give you anxiety? Practicing is harder but let us talk theory.

Edited April 2, 2019 by OCDhavenobrain

[taurean]

Hi Phil 

Try and apply what you already know to all the OCD situations that present themselves. 

Think what we would do and do that. 

It's all about standing up to intrusions, remembering the cognitive side of how we have told you the illness works. 

Not playing OCD's game and breaking OCD's rules. 

[Guest Phil10]

27 minutes ago, Angst said:

Ignore that thought about being new. Ignore that future feeling. Go out wearing an item for the stag tonight. Not sure if you are a troll or genuine? Who knows? But you have captured new posts by adding a new comment like you last sentence to accomplish long, very long threads. Some of the longest that I have ever seen. Are  you a troll?

No definitely not becuase if I wasn’t suffering I would probably most on a leisure hobby based forum instead. 

[Guest Phil10]

21 minutes ago, OCDhavenobrain said:

I do agree that you need to atleast give it a try Phil. You have to know by now that not doing compulsions will give you anxiety? Practicing is harder but let us talk theory.

Yes if I replace an item that no longer works.

I have been “forced” by ocd to quit compulsions which I don’t get becuase ocd wants you to do them. 

However just becuase I never replaced something doesn’t make it better becuase I still have anxiety about those irons despite taking them all back. I’m using the original ones but a bit anxious. Sometimes  the anxiety isn’t high. 

So yes I am not sure what the soution is I fear I have a wedding coming up there’s no way I will be cured in 3 months? Intact the chances are the stress of it could make me worse.

[Guest OCDhavenobrain]

2 minutes ago, Phil10 said:

Yes if I replace an item that no longer works.

I have been “forced” by ocd to quit compulsions which I don’t get becuase ocd wants you to do them. 

However just becuase I never replaced something doesn’t make it better becuase I still have anxiety about those irons despite taking them all back. I’m using the original ones but a bit anxious. Sometimes  the anxiety isn’t high. 

So yes I am not sure what the soution is I fear I have a wedding coming up there’s no way I will be cured in 3 months? Intact the chances are the stress of it could make me worse.

I am not sure if that is an answer to angst's good advice about what you can do today.

[Guest Phil10]

15 minutes ago, OCDhavenobrain said:

I am not sure if that is an answer to angst's good advice about what you can do today.

Well I can’t wear these clothes today. I can wear them when the event comes but as I said the ocd and anxiety will come. 

[Guest Phil10]

I am frustrated as I fear this towel rail is contaminated once the seed of doubt has been planted that’s it. I worry if I put a towel on it and touch my phone it’s ruined. The ocd has won here and I am beaten by the ocd. I accept the thought was probably false my head made some garbage up but becuase I had the seed of doubt that’s it I worry now. 

[taurean]

So is that it? Toss in the towel, accept you are beaten - even though in your heart of hearts you know it's just plain old OCD? 

No it's not. Because, as with all of us, we can change our thinking and behavioural response to the intrusion. 

When that seed of doubt and/or an intrusion come calling treat it as if it's just OCD, even if there is doubt, and refocus your mind away from it without believing a resultant chain of contamination, and catastrophising. 

And keep on doing that, whatever the OCD tries to "shout in your ear". 

This will be really tough at first, but it will start to become easier.