help

[tia]

If you have contamination ocd and cannot manage on your own,and want to leave abusive partner, my friend said even care home would not have you, so where do you go?

[Hal]

Hi tia,

I honestly don't know if your friend is right on that one. I would think they would...the problem might be available vacancies,  the expense and how you would feel and cope in that kind of environment, they aren't always great.

You might feel more comfortable chatting to a woman rather than a guy about this, I completely understand if you would and I'll bow out...I noticed though no one had had a chance to reply to you and wanted to try to help.

I appreciate this is a very sensitive subject, so please don't feel you have to answer this,  but do you feel you're in danger and need to leave your partner as soon as possible or could you take some time to plan this out and maybe arrange to find a place of your own with extra support organised through your CMHT? 

You might already have seen this, but if not it would be worth taking a look at this link..

https://www.womenshealth.gov/relationships-and-safety/domestic-violence/leaving-abusive-relationship

It seemed very helpful to me. So much comes down to time....would family or friends be able to let you stay or perhaps a friend of a friend if it's safer not to have any contact with your partner?

Normally a refuge, hotel or B&B would be options, but if you need extra care those aren't really practical. 

I just wanted to say something, but I'm sure other people will also reply.

[tia]

Thank you lots for replying, it means a lot.  Mainly mental abuse which has terrible effect on people, very hard and makes ocd so much worse,  worn out by it.

[Hal]

It's not acceptable for him to treat you that way...it might be worth giving Women's Aid a call:

https://www.womensaid.org.uk

I know your situation's more complicated because of the OCD...but just talking to someone one-to-one who knows exactly what you're going through would help.

Have you had any support for the OCD? It might also be worth having a word with your GP for a referral to get some help with the contamination fears, it may make it a little easier to break away from him.

I'm just sorry you're going through this, it's hard enough living with OCD without also having to deal with this too.