Confused and empty

[don't know]

I'm dealing with sexual thoughts (family related) and I'm so confused. I was reading another website where someone talked about how her relationships never felt right, she never felt an emotional connection, butterflies, anything towards her husband. She never did. She thought she did. Anyway she ended up engaging in these acts.

Like what? What if that happens to me? I don't know what to think that's undeniable if you feel nothing towards that person and actually act on it. She said that this was more exciting to her. I don't know, I react to these thoughts and go on these websites all the time. So there must be some truth. I feel hopeless. 

[Orwell1984]

Another thread after all that. 

[dksea]

6 hours ago, don't know said:

Like what? What if that happens to me?

What if you lose your job? What if you are struck by a car?  What if your house burns down?  What if you have a heart attack?  What if you are kidnapped by terrorists?  What if theres a giant earthquake and you are swallowed up by the earth? What if God was one of us?  Oh, wait, that last one doesn't really apply...

Point being you can go down an endless road of what ifs.  If you let yourself you will always ALWAYS be able to come up with a theoretically possible, scenario based on a shred of "evidence" and a drop of doubt to continue ruminating and worrying.  And the result will always be the same, more anxiety, more problems, more OCD.  You can not win fighting that battle.  And all these compulsions you keep doing, checking these other websites, trying to "prove" to yourself that you are different, etc. it too only ends up in the same result.  More anxiety, more problems, more OCD.

Meanwhile, what if it DOESNT happen?  What if you spend all this time worrying, and dwelling, and researching, and checking, and feeling miserable for something that never happens?  You might think its not possible to not worry or dwell or check this, you might feel like you HAVE to know.  Thats OCD.  The reality is you DONT have to do any of that, no matter what the doubt tells you.  You are absolutely allowed to tell these worries that you aren't going to do what they say anymore.  It may be hard, especially at first, but its possible, and its way better then doing what you are doing now.