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Has anyone else had a similar problem like this ? please help ?


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I would be anywhere on the street , it mostly happens in a club .( I do not drink alcohol . ) 

My ocd always flares up when i hug Lady , It seems to be like a saftey/checking habit . 10 minutes after i have hugged a female i have a voice in my head saying     "did you just kiss her , or did we just kiss" ?  it confuses me because its like , you can't just forget you kissed someone ?

its quite annoying because i actually message the person , and they always say what the hell , no you didnt .

i have stopped this compulsion now by messaging the person now because ive learnt it worsens the thought .

this OCD habit only happens when im in a Relationship . i love my girlfriend so much it seems i do this because i dont want to hurt and ruin our relatuionship ? , Has anyone experienced this ?

i do have OCD most checking , for example doors , lights , taps and handbreak ,   ect !

much appreciated william .

Edited by WilliamBnixon
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Hi William 

Yes this is a typical OCD issue with relationships. The OCD is challenging true core character values of faithfulness by suggesting the sufferer would kiss another woman. 

Don't believe it, don't respond to it. Don't try and work it out - leave it be. 

Intrusions in OCD eventually lose power when they don't get attention. 

All the best 

Roy 

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Thanks for the reply Taurean , i just dont understand it , it feels like i cant hug female friends anymore with out thinking i have kissed them and cheated on my partner . this obsession has always happened when i have got into a relationship . I have recently started cbt and takign sertraline . The biggest thing i have done is told my current partner i adore and trust about my problem and she is amazing and understands . just really draining .

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This is, I believe, the third time you have related the same story. What are you doing? You've received explanations and advice. It's like you forget about those and start again at the beginning, telling the same story.

How's that working for you?

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It's okay. This happens all the time, with lots of people. Thoughts get stuck. And sufferers go round and round with the thought.

It's OCD. You get intrusive thoughts, which cause distress. You do compulsions to alleviate the distress. That's it. That's OCD. Asking why is fruitless. We really don't know why certain people get stuck on certain thoughts. But we do know how to fix it. Focus on fixing it.

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3 hours ago, WilliamBnixon said:

Thanks for the reply Taurean , i just dont understand it , it feels like i cant hug female friends anymore with out thinking i have kissed them and cheated on my partner . this obsession has always happened when i have got into a relationship . I have recently started cbt and takign sertraline . The biggest thing i have done is told my current partner i adore and trust about my problem and she is amazing and understands . just really draining .

The understanding is purely that this is how your particular OCD's take on the relationship theme is working. 

It's nothing to do with you. As I said, and as you say, your love cherishing and faithfulness to your lady isn't changing - what is happening is your OCD is targeting those core values and alleging different. 

This is a common theme of OCD. That's the knowledge you need. 

Now, as PolarBear says, it's time to believe this and not react to those unpleasant intrusions.

OCD lies, and causes the distress (Disorder). It's what it does. And in CBT we learn what we have told you. 

Let it go, don't believe or listen to it. 

Keep doing this and gradually you will overcome this. 

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