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lily17

Convinced that I've done something wrong (this is for real)

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I was on my mom's phone, swipping the pictures she has on gallery and a pic of me sitting on a chair and my dog was leaning on my leg with his paws. So I was zooming in on me, and then I had to have a symmetrical zoomed in with my dog but I didn't want to zoom in on his genitals like they had to be out of the picture but I'm not sure about this I think I zoomed in on his genitals for sexual reasons and then zoomed in again on me and his head, next thing that came was testing (to check if arousal happened when zooming in on his genitals) zooming in on his genitals again (two times i think and not sure which one for sexual reasons) So in conclusion I believe I've hurt my dog zooming in on his genitals and then like swipping up on the picture (like a rectangle imagine the zooming in like that then swipping up, I think I've hurt him with this movement on the screen) and I'm devastated why did I do such a thing , I believe I've hurt him for real please help 

What if it was possible to sexually hurt someone by zooming in on them on a picture?? I think I would do it and thats why I feel bad I mean... I think I would do it in real life too like squeezing his genitals or something Im so anxious this is so weird

Edited by lily17

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You know this just your OCD. Don't engage with thinking about it and you'll see how silly it is :) We all have  mind farts, as I call them. Issue is you're thinking they're significant.

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4 minutes ago, Paul92 said:

You know this just your OCD. Don't engage with thinking about it and you'll see how silly it is :) We all have  mind farts, as I call them. Issue is you're thinking they're significant.

But Paul what I've done is so wrong and I just did it as if it was nothing I wanted to do it deep down in real life thats what I think I've done this ... there is not other reason whatsoever

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5 minutes ago, lily17 said:

But Paul what I've done is so wrong and I just did it as if it was nothing I wanted to do it deep down in real life thats what I think I've done this ... there is not other reason whatsoever

Trust me I've been there with other things. Let it go and go about your day as normal. Your mind will get bored of it and you'll see how silly you are being. I know how hard it is, but that is what will work for you. This is so insignificant.

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2 minutes ago, Paul92 said:

Trust me I've been there with other things. Let it go and go about your day as normal. Your mind will get bored of it and you'll see how silly you are being. I know how hard it is, but that is what will work for you. This is so insignificant.

Well i'll try to let it go because deep down I know it is so silly but I can't help but think I wanted to hurt him, that I've done it with sexual intentions...

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This is more of the same old. You coming here, confessing about your latest obsession and expecting reassurance.

Come on, Lily. You've been doing this gor a long time now. We've told you every time you need to dtop doing this and stop reacting so badly to your obsessions.

What you continue to do is not working!

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2 minutes ago, PolarBear said:

This is more of the same old. You coming here, confessing about your latest obsession and expecting reassurance.

Come on, Lily. You've been doing this gor a long time now. We've told you every time you need to dtop doing this and stop reacting so badly to your obsessions.

What you continue to do is not working!

But now I think I've sexually hurt my dog doing what I've done... I DONT know if it was for sexual reasons and/or if I really wanted it... I DONT know and I can't stop either:(

Edited by lily17

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Lily, this is exactly the same as 50 other threads you've started. Always the new obsession is real. Always it's way worse than all the others. Always it's catastrophic. Always you are a bad person. Over and over again. And always you want some soothing words from us.

Enough. You MUST start dealing with your obsessions differently. You MUST start taking on the good advice you are given. Or this will continue, on and on.

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Hi lily,

Have you had a chance to look at the road map Ashley posted on your previous thread? The crux of the problem I think is that maybe you haven’t really taken some time to learn about the disorder and how it works...only by doing that will you be able to pinpoint where it’s at play when the ‘what if’ strikes and what you then need to do next.

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3 minutes ago, Hal said:

Hi lily,

Have you had a chance to look at the road map Ashley posted on your previous thread? The crux of the problem I think is that maybe you haven’t really taken some time to learn about the disorder and how it works...only by doing that will you be able to pinpoint where it’s at play when the ‘what if’ strikes and what you then need to do next.

Yes I looked at it the other day but... what I've done this time... it's incredible. What would people think about this? About me doing that... it's so weird it's just something a deviant would do.

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Could you atleast try to think about OCD when you are not panicking? As it is now you are only "thinking anout solutions" when you get the panic.

 

Edited by OCDhavenobrain

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On 22/03/2019 at 09:04, lily17 said:

Yes I looked at it the other day but... what I've done this time... it's incredible. What would people think about this? About me doing that... it's so weird it's just something a deviant would do.

What you seem to have done isn't incredible at all. In fact if it didn't cause great pain and anxiety, I'd say it was boring. People get 'funny' thoughts all the time, they're completely irrelevant. Try to treat them/this as such. 

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