GreyCat Posted April 29, 2019 Share Posted April 29, 2019 As Gingerbreadgirl says "This Naked Mind" or also "Alcohol Explained" by William Porter. Sorry I can't add anything regarding the OCD since I'm struggling a lot but you mentioned that you want to seek help for your problem with alcohol so I wanted to add a book recommendation since Alcohol Explained really helped me. Link to comment
Guest OCDhavenobrain Posted April 29, 2019 Share Posted April 29, 2019 2 hours ago, paradoxer said: The worst betrayal is jumping to the tune of OCD. Yes and also OCD can be detrimental to all social relationships. Threadmaker is worried about some thought in his head but while this is going on reality goes on and people around us are just humans and they get tired. Deleting is avoidance. When it comes to your obsessions it's the same as when you wrote it before (weeks ago) and they advices you got then are as good today as they were then, the only thing which has changed is that you have dug yourself deeper down. Link to comment
paradoxer Posted April 29, 2019 Share Posted April 29, 2019 And that's right, 'tired' is the word, loved ones can often be worn down by the incessant demands of another's OCD. The bravest ... not too mention kindest (and the most therapeutic) thing a sufferer can do is suck up the anxiety, and not inflict rituals on others. Link to comment
gingerbreadgirl Posted April 30, 2019 Share Posted April 30, 2019 How are you doing BT? Link to comment
battlethrough Posted May 1, 2019 Author Share Posted May 1, 2019 I'm OK thanks lovely. I haven't drank this week and have managed not to confess or knowingly seek reassurance through Google. I still feel I have betrayed but I hope this gets less over time, I have self medicated on booze for a long time but I will get there hopefully with clearer mind. How are you gbg, I hope your keeping on top, you and of course others have always been there in times of support but without the reassurance I'm obviously seekingx Link to comment
gingerbreadgirl Posted May 1, 2019 Share Posted May 1, 2019 1 hour ago, battlethrough said: I haven't drank this week and have managed not to confess or knowingly seek reassurance through Google. You should be really pleased with yourself for this avoiding compulsions is no easy thing (I suck at it ) - you should be proud. Just watch your other compulsions too - most notably ruminating and trying to figure out whether it's "OK" or not. Just leave it alone. In time this will fade - but be prepared for the next one! Another situation will come along, that's how ocd works, and again it will feel deadly real - be prepared for that and don't give in. 1 hour ago, battlethrough said: I have self medicated on booze for a long time but I will get there hopefully with clearer mind. I really think having a proper break from booze can really transform things from you, I'd really recommend you check out one of the books mentioned in this thread. 1 hour ago, battlethrough said: How are you gbg, I hope your keeping on top I'm OK thank you, good days and bad but we've just got to keep going haven't we! I really identify with your theme and it sucks, but we have to remember we have this theme because of how much we love our partners and how important our relationships are to us. Ocd likes to attack these core values and make us feel like scum but it's lying! Link to comment
PolarBear Posted May 1, 2019 Share Posted May 1, 2019 BT, the feelings you have about the thoughts always goes away eventually. You just have to look at your track record to know that is true. The less time you spend ruminating about this thing, the quicker it will subside. Link to comment
battlethrough Posted May 3, 2019 Author Share Posted May 3, 2019 I'm trying so hard to do everything correct but it's still eating away I haven't googled or confessed, when I find myself ruminating I try to distract and not analyse but I have this deep down feeling of guilt and constant blurry memories of me purposely installing Facebook just to see a photo and sending this phantom texd Don't know what else to do, I say to myself Ithat I can't so anything about it and to let it be yet still I feel I have chelated or at least done something deceitful and of course the urge to be honest with my partner about my wrong doing Feel very stuck as to whether this genuinely should be confessed Link to comment
battlethrough Posted May 3, 2019 Author Share Posted May 3, 2019 Just don't know what to do, she's related for gods sake, how could I be such a creep Link to comment
PolarBear Posted May 3, 2019 Share Posted May 3, 2019 Don't you see that this has happened many times in the past? Same sort of thing. The alleged misdeed, the guilt, the urge to confess. It's a pattern. A pattern called OCD. It's good you are abstaining from compulsions. That's great. Keep going. Stay away from compulsions and this will subside. Link to comment
battlethrough Posted May 3, 2019 Author Share Posted May 3, 2019 Thanks pb, when I strip it back I also have to change my belief that I'm a vile human being as all my compulsions lead straight back to that belief but that's a hard nut to crack Link to comment
PolarBear Posted May 3, 2019 Share Posted May 3, 2019 Yeah, it will be. That's a core belief. As such, you are always on the lookout for evidence you are vile, no matter how wrong or ridiculous the evidence is. Link to comment
battlethrough Posted May 3, 2019 Author Share Posted May 3, 2019 Thanks pb, my therapist drew a chart about where it stems back and it's not jus t about avoiding compulsions, the CORE BELIEF Is that I'm a vile person, and I have to try and BELIEVE I'M NOT Link to comment
battlethrough Posted May 3, 2019 Author Share Posted May 3, 2019 Or not just try, I need to work on the coe that is ima vile person Link to comment
battlethrough Posted May 5, 2019 Author Share Posted May 5, 2019 What am I doing wrong, the feeling I have to confess this nasty thing I did is unbearable Link to comment
PolarBear Posted May 5, 2019 Share Posted May 5, 2019 Stop thinking of it as a nasty thing. It wasn't. You loaded Facebook. Your motives are unclear because you were drunk. Let it go. Link to comment
battlethrough Posted May 6, 2019 Author Share Posted May 6, 2019 Thanks pb, I'm trying to treat it as nothing but as always that voice in my head is saying its the worst thing I could've done, especially trying to send a message, although there is no evidence Link to comment
battlethrough Posted May 7, 2019 Author Share Posted May 7, 2019 Every single morning, whack, first thing,tormented with the guilt that I pursued this and confess confess confess confess in my head all the time, feeling weaker by the day Link to comment
battlethrough Posted May 8, 2019 Author Share Posted May 8, 2019 Why won't the guilt go, I feel it only will if I confess to it all but I know I can't. Getting really down over this Link to comment
PolarBear Posted May 8, 2019 Share Posted May 8, 2019 I guarantee it's because you are doing compulsions, notably ruminating. Link to comment
battlethrough Posted May 9, 2019 Author Share Posted May 9, 2019 (edited) Quote Thanks pb, I know your correct, It just seems so automatic, just feel so done in with feeling like a lyer and fraud Edited May 9, 2019 by battlethrough Link to comment
battlethrough Posted May 10, 2019 Author Share Posted May 10, 2019 Really struggling,drunk or not, if I downloaded Facebook for that and then tried to texd, isn't that something that should be owned up to, I mean that's real intent of betrayal isn't it, it's wrong, the guilt is surely genuine Link to comment
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