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Query once again..


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I have a simple query. I know the difference between just thoughts and intrusive thoughts. But what about the real instances? Things which have happened? I know I misbehaved with my nieces. They are two-three years old. And I am guilty about it. I wish to go to tell their parents and leave it to them as to how they wish to handle this and my misdoings. 

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Hi pranjali

They are still just thoughts. You are interpreting a real event (perhaps) but your conclusions about it are just that, thoughts. Just like someone with ocd about cleaning can worry that they've contaminated themselves by, for example, touching a door handle - the event is real (touching the door handle) but their conclusion is wildly disproportionate. 

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Okay, I am not able to follow certain things

 

1) Can OCD be about real life events?

2) If yes, then if there are intrusive thoughts about the event, isn't it only human to feel pathetic about something apologize for your wronging?

3) How is it that telling someone who I wronged (i.e. the parents of those nieces), is a compulsion? Isn't how normal human functioning works?

4) What part is this even OCD? - I did something wrong, I need to apologize and I wait for how they want to react to this? This is how normal relations work right, what about this would be OCD?

5) The fact that I did not behave well, doesn't it mean that I am not capable to be good to children?

Edited by Pranjali
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1 minute ago, Pranjali said:

Okay, I am not able to follow certain things

 

1) Can OCD be about real life events?

2) If yes, then if there are intrusive thoughts about the event, isn't it only human to feel pathetic about something apologize for your wronging?

3) How is it that telling someone who I wronged (i.e. the parents of those nieces), is a compulsion? Isn't how normal human functioning works?

4) What part is this even OCD? - I did something wrong, I need to apologize and I wait for how they want to react to this? This is how normal relations work right, what about this would be OCD?

5) The fact that I did not behave well, doesn't it mean that I am not capable to be good to children?

OK - what exactly have you done that is so bad? 

You can only give facts. Feelings and speculation don't count. 

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Just because the kids are so small and I do not have enough evidence to prove my misdoings, why should I sneak out of this? They should know I did not behave well!

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Hi Pranjali, 

Your problem is like many before it. It seems like you have had an intrusive image and now you have doubt over what happened. The reason you don't need to act is because you don't know anything actually happened, but as well as that, if you did confess to thinking which is all that happened, this is almost certainly going to happen again. 

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I have been reading a few other threads too. But for me, this is a real life event and hence the cycle feels never ending. 

What concerns me is isn't lack of evidence an excuse (in this case as the kids are too young to communicate) to get away?

For example: if a child who was misbehaved/assaulted by a perpetrator and if the child was not old enough to have the cognitive abilities of right and wrong, wouldn't the perpetrator be taken up to ask by the parents (of the child). 

How would a non OCD sufferer react to this differently if he/she had misbehaved?

Edited by Pranjali
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But you have no evidence anything happened, none whatsoever. 

Imagine if you suddenly get an image that you ran someone over with your car. Does that mean you ran someone over with your car? 

What if you get an image that yesterday your snuck out of your house and murdered your nextdoor neighbour. Does that mean you need to go to prison for murder? 

You have no evidence either of these things happened, but you have no evidence they didn't happen either. 

There's a million things that could have happened on this basis. Where do you stop? 

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9 minutes ago, gingerbreadgirl said:

You have no evidence either of these things happened, but you have no evidence they didn't happen either. 

May be this is what happens to be the problem here. If I go and confess it to the parents, wouldn't that be right and fair? Because they deserve to know?

Sorry to ask so many questions, don't know where to go!

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29 minutes ago, gingerbreadgirl said:

Images and memories don't count :)

What facts are there?

I'm willing to bet there aren't any. 

How do you prove facts? For me, the instance happened! How can I prove it?

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6 minutes ago, Pranjali said:

For me, the instance happened!

Exactly - for you it happened, because you have decided that's what happened, in accordance with your OCD fears of doing those things. That doesn't mean it actually happened in reality.

I get these sorts of thoughts a lot too - did I touch someone inappropriately? Did I misbehave? Did I say something offensive? Should I confess to doing something wrong?

It's all OCD. The very fact that you're scared about this is proof in itself that you don't want to harm anybody :) No matter what your OCD tells you.

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6 minutes ago, Sputnik said:

I get these sorts of thoughts a lot too - did I touch someone inappropriately? Did I misbehave? Did I say something offensive? Should I confess to doing something wrong?

Hmmm, it is difficult to treat them as thoughts when your mind is convinced with the otherwise.

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3 minutes ago, Pranjali said:

Hmmm, it is difficult to treat them as thoughts when your mind is convinced with the otherwise.

Of course it is, that's the difficult part :) People wouldn't struggle so much with OCD if you could just cast aside the thoughts without any effort.

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Hi Pranjali,

On December 1st 2018 I replied to one of your previous posts questioning the medication that you had been prescribed (60mg fludac and 50 mg Serta). Please see quote below

Quote

 

Hi Pranjali,

Have you got that correct?... I am no expert, but that seems like a strange combination of medication!

I understand that treatment may differ around the world, but it seems strange being prescribed 2 different types of SSRI at the same time? Having said that, do as your psychiatrist says, and hopefully someone else more knowledgeable can confirm if this is normal.

 

Take care.

 

Having not had a reply, I just wanted to bring this up again to see if anyone more knowledgeable can answer because I still question this, and the adverse effects it may have. Here in the UK, I think it is more common to have 1 SSRI, & a tiny amount of anti-psychotic as a combination, as opposed to 2 SSRI's.

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