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BigDave

Straw poll on bouncing water

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Yo, what’s up people. I need to ask a favour/opinion. 

I want to know from you guys what you think about something. Essentially, I want to know what your opinion about splash back is because I think my mind vastly overstates it. So I’ll give you an example. My brother pees on the floor right? Say for whatever reason I need to wash my hands or arms at the sink before I clean it up. In your mind, do you think there is much chance that any water that hits the floor can splash back on the urine and bounce onto me? I feel like that is unrealistic. If for example, I was using a shower hose against the floor, then perhaps but just some water that comes from me washing my arm sloppily is unlikely.  Actually I think generally my feelings about the ability of water to bounce back generally terrifies me. It’s ability to bounce back always makes me wonder if anything I do is having a splashback on me. 

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As Orwell says, washing up BEFORE cleaning is not necessary.

Meanwhile, the bigger problem I see here is how concerned you are about splash back at all.  Thats not something non-OCD (or those of us without cleanliness/contamination compulsions) even worry about, like, at all.

If you want to react to this in as normal a fashion as possible here is what you do in this situation:

Step 1.  Clean up the floor.
Step 2.  Wash your hands/arms after cleaning the floor.

You could even reasonably put on some of those reusable rubber cleaning gloves while you are scrubbing if you really wanted, thats a normal thing some people do, but worrying about splash back is, again, not a "normal" response.  Even if it DOES somehow happen, so what?  It won't hurt you, you'll be fine. So answering the question of how realistic splash back is isn't really helpful, its just reassurance.  Instead you need to focus on the root of the problem, the fear of contamination from things to begin with.

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You want reassurance on the physics of water splashes.

Reassurance is a compulsion. I could give you an answer but your brain would come up with another scenario.

Edited by Handy

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Yes, as we have said regularly before, it's your thinking and behavioural response that is the problem, not what happens. 

So no straw poll is necessary. 

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Yes. Splashes happen and you could get urine on you. Same as for anybody else. Difference is, most anyone else wouldn't think twice about it.

And if you want to beat OCD, you have to not only NOT wash before, but after too.

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4 minutes ago, PolarBear said:

And if you want to beat OCD, you have to not only NOT wash before, but after too.

I disagree with this, washing ones hands after cleaning the bathroom is a reasonable course of action.  I don't think OCD recovery requires (or should require) a cessation of normal healthy behaviors.

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4 hours ago, dksea said:

I disagree with this, washing ones hands after cleaning the bathroom is a reasonable course of action.  I don't think OCD recovery requires (or should require) a cessation of normal healthy behaviors.

I agree Dksea. 

Edited by taurean

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Yes, keep common sense. Its a good goal. 

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On 09/05/2019 at 09:29, dksea said:

As Orwell says, washing up BEFORE cleaning is not necessary.

Meanwhile, the bigger problem I see here is how concerned you are about splash back at all.  Thats not something non-OCD (or those of us without cleanliness/contamination compulsions) even worry about, like, at all.

If you want to react to this in as normal a fashion as possible here is what you do in this situation:

Step 1.  Clean up the floor.
Step 2.  Wash your hands/arms after cleaning the floor.

You could even reasonably put on some of those reusable rubber cleaning gloves while you are scrubbing if you really wanted, thats a normal thing some people do, but worrying about splash back is, again, not a "normal" response.  Even if it DOES somehow happen, so what?  It won't hurt you, you'll be fine. So answering the question of how realistic splash back is isn't really helpful, its just reassurance.  Instead you need to focus on the root of the problem, the fear of contamination from things to begin with.

I actually think you misunderstood me. It wasn’t that I was washing before cleaning as in I felt it necessary to wash before I could clean. I had to go for a wizz and before I touched the mop, I thought I’d clean my hands after going for a wee. Essentially I thought that was fair. 

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5 minutes ago, BigDave said:

I actually think you misunderstood me. It wasn’t that I was washing before cleaning as in I felt it necessary to wash before I could clean. I had to go for a wizz and before I touched the mop, I thought I’d clean my hands after going for a wee. Essentially I thought that was fair. 

Follow his advice. It is real good

Edited by OCDhavenobrain

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On 10/05/2019 at 02:57, dksea said:

I disagree with this, washing ones hands after cleaning the bathroom is a reasonable course of action.  

I think I am with pb on this one. Yes people without ocd may (or may not - everyone is different) wash their hands after cleaning the bathroom. But we DO have ocd. And therefore we may sometimes have to go beyond what a normal person would do. just like someone with a broken leg may need a cast on - normal people without a broken leg don't do this. But if you have a broken leg then you need to do this abnormal thing to heal. I see ocd as the same. By far the biggest threat to dave is ocd - so therefore his question shouldn't be "is this normal" but "how can I best beat ocd ". He may decide he wants to wash his hands anyway (fair enough - I would too) but i think sometimes exposure has to be extreme. 

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As a side point,  I think I have lost sight of what is a normal behaviour/response. For example, touching my lap which is slightly wet after going for a wee is revolting for me. Yes, I know that most men might be a little wet after a pee and most people won’t think twice about their lap but the fact that I had bladder issues makes me think it’s excessive and that I’m spreading urine everywhere. I know what you will all say - urine isn’t going to harm you so it doesn’t matter and to that I completely understand your POV and agree for you. Just as in the same way that when my cats wipe their face on me and get their eye gunk on me, if I wipe it off with a tissue, that’s fine and in any case it won’t harm me. So I shouldn’t panic. It’s hard not to react in any case because I still feel contaminated. 

And then there are things that are just plain gross. And I’m going to put out a WARNING here. Do not read ahead if you are squeamish. 

Four things my autistic brother does besides pee everywhere.

1) he does not wash his hands after he does number 2.

2) he sometimes fiddles with himself and does not wash his hands. 

3) he will not think twice about putting his arm in the food waste bin to pull out something like a battery.

4) he walks barefoot in the garden and then puts his feet on the sofa. 

He does other things too but those are some examples. My parents just get on with things but he touches everything around the house and I have to handle that too. It’s revolting to me and not my parents and I can’t understand it. They say he’s disabled and it won’t harm me but I’m still repulsed. 

Then there is the whole cat thing and both of them seem to love to stick their butts on me whether near my face, arms or legs. I’m almost afraid to stroke them and am constantly watching their bottoms because they do stick it into me. I realise that this over the top (I think) but I don’t want cat poo on me. 

So yeah, you can see my problem. 

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1 hour ago, gingerbreadgirl said:

I think I am with pb on this one. Yes people without ocd may (or may not - everyone is different) wash their hands after cleaning the bathroom. But we DO have ocd. And therefore we may sometimes have to go beyond what a normal person would do. just like someone with a broken leg may need a cast on - normal people without a broken leg don't do this. But if you have a broken leg then you need to do this abnormal thing to heal. I see ocd as the same. By far the biggest threat to dave is ocd - so therefore his question shouldn't be "is this normal" but "how can I best beat ocd ". He may decide he wants to wash his hands anyway (fair enough - I would too) but i think sometimes exposure has to be extreme. 

Bang on. Ashley started a thread on this a while back. Sufferers are so far over on the safety side of the scale that only moving to the carefree side for a while can bring equilibrium. 

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2 hours ago, BigDave said:

For example, touching my lap which is slightly wet after going for a wee is revolting for me.

This is the revulsive thinking side of OCD teaming up with the contamination. Two themes for the price of one :(

Challenge that Dave. Carrying on with that revulsive thinking is just strengthening the feelings of revulsion, giving them justification and belief. 

What is normal is really how sensible, risk-averse men operate. It's just as simple as that. 

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2 minutes ago, taurean said:

This is the revulsive thinking side of OCD teaming up with the contamination. Two themes for the price of one :(

Challenge that Dave. Carrying on with that revulsive thinking is just strengthening the feelings of revulsion, giving them justification and belief. 

What is normal is really how sensible, risk-averse men operate. It's just as simple as that. 

And how would a sensible risk averse man act?

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We have told you this before on your threads. See if you can recall it and note it down. 

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The business of urinating in men happens to be a messy process. It just is. 

And it's worse at home. No urinal sensibly positioned on the wall. 

So we have to accept spillage without getting overboard about it. 

That's generally what we all do. 

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Hi dave 

As others have said I think you need to be concerned with what's most likely to beat your ocd, not what people without this theme may or may not do. Ocd is the threat you're dealing with, not urine (even if it doesn't feel like that). 

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5 hours ago, BigDave said:

As a side point,  I think I have lost sight of what is a normal behaviour/response. For example, touching my lap which is slightly wet after going for a wee is revolting for me. Yes, I know that most men might be a little wet after a pee and most people won’t think twice about their lap but the fact that I had bladder issues makes me think it’s excessive and that I’m spreading urine everywhere. I know what you will all say - urine isn’t going to harm you so it doesn’t matter and to that I completely understand your POV and agree for you. Just as in the same way that when my cats wipe their face on me and get their eye gunk on me, if I wipe it off with a tissue, that’s fine and in any case it won’t harm me. So I shouldn’t panic. It’s hard not to react in any case because I still feel contaminated. 

And then there are things that are just plain gross. And I’m going to put out a WARNING here. Do not read ahead if you are squeamish. 

Four things my autistic brother does besides pee everywhere.

1) he does not wash his hands after he does number 2.

2) he sometimes fiddles with himself and does not wash his hands. 

3) he will not think twice about putting his arm in the food waste bin to pull out something like a battery.

4) he walks barefoot in the garden and then puts his feet on the sofa. 

He does other things too but those are some examples. My parents just get on with things but he touches everything around the house and I have to handle that too. It’s revolting to me and not my parents and I can’t understand it. They say he’s disabled and it won’t harm me but I’m still repulsed. 

Then there is the whole cat thing and both of them seem to love to stick their butts on me whether near my face, arms or legs. I’m almost afraid to stroke them and am constantly watching their bottoms because they do stick it into me. I realise that this over the top (I think) but I don’t want cat poo on me. 

So yeah, you can see my problem. 

To what extent would moving to your own place solve your problems? You are living in your parents’ place at the moment with their house rules. Would your level of OCD be the same or less or more? With regard to ERP experiments you would have more control over the conditions of the experiment.

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2 hours ago, Angst said:

To what extent would moving to your own place solve your problems? You are living in your parents’ place at the moment with their house rules. Would your level of OCD be the same or less or more? With regard to ERP experiments you would have more control over the conditions of the experiment.

In a way, it would solve problems but also my health issues besides this wouldn’t allow for it. Furthermore, I feel like moving to another place would be like one grand version of avoidance. Plus, I would never be able to have my brother or anyone from my family around because they might contaminate the place. And it’s not like I could tell my family that they can come visit as long as they don’t bring my brother along. 

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