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Hi all

 

It's been a long time since I've posted but I've recently been moving house and having alot going on so maybe my OCD is flaring up a litte.

In regards to moving house, I've always wanted mirrored furniture and recently purchased two bedside drawers and one big set of drawers.

When they arrived they looked great but as they had been packaged I got some wipes to clean inside the drawers etc before storing.

I noticed the drawers are black inside and the black was coming off? I opened the windows and aired them for 2 days and when I was wiping with a dry kitchen roll the black is still coming off?

It's hard to explain but I'm basically petrified about storing my clothes as I'm worried about the black coming off onto my clothes. It has a strong smell, probably because it was just out the factory but I'm worried the black drawers inside it's the paint or something coming off or chemicals. 

 

I'm worried because I used dettol wipes but its even coming off behind the cabinet and underneath (areas I didn't clean)

 

I have images I can insert if someone can explain how?

 

Thaks

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Hi Gemzi, 

That is most likely dust that has settled on the unit during the factory manufacturing process! :yes:

If you had purchased white or light grey units, it would show up more clearly, and your cloth would still turn the same colour. If it were me, I'd just give it a quick vacuum, & maybe a quick wipe with a 'dry' microfibre cloth, & certainly not anything damp like a Dettol wipe.

It sounds like you have been doing well, as you have not been on here for a while, but it looks like you still need to work on your OCD a little!

All the best. 

:)

 

 

 

 

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Guest OCDhavenobrain

Taking pictures so we can get a more accurate wiev is a compulsion my friend.

When it comes to furnitures I am also inclined to worry. Chemicals you say, well there is chemicals in most things but what can we do?

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I do not think that you need to feel too anxious. But if I had bought furniture and the interior or exterior colour was coming off I would contact the retailer. I have taken photographs of faulty goods as well as faulty tradesman’s work and they have provided valuable evidence in disputes. Certainly at the County Court level and the complaints’ departments of enterprises. Also standard procedure in customer shows like Watchdog.

I wipe surfaces with a damp clothe because the dust attaches to it. The damp clothe is recommended by clearers, OCD specialists and therapists.

Photograph taking was recommended by support workers at my CHMT and therapists at the Institute of Anxiety and Trauma in London we exchanged communication by photographs and text.  I think that there are valuable insights can be gained by videos of such things as checking rituals as witnessed by videos on the internet. And the state of things in your domain can be indicated by photographs.

Edited by Angst
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3 hours ago, Angst said:

I wipe surfaces with a damp clothe because the dust attaches to it. The damp clothe is recommended by clearers, OCD specialists and therapists.

Hi,

I am trying to understand in what context specialists in OCD would recommend using a damp cloth for OCD. Do you mean as a graduated step down, if for example, you have got into the routine of using Dettol/antibacterial wipes for contamination type OCD?

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In home visits for hoarding and checking OCD. Included very practical instruction. Also standard approach for professional cleaners. Employed quite a few in my time.

Edited by Angst
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58 minutes ago, Handy said:

Yes, contact manufacturer & ask.

No, do not do this, it would be feeding a compulsion.

The best thing you can do is simply continue to use the drawers anyway.  There are many simple and non-problematic explanations for a little bit of discoloration to occur while wiping down the new furniture, others have mentioned some above.  

Hang in there, try to ride out the anxiety as best you can, and continue to act against the demands of OCD.  You can do this!

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I didn't do too well.

Now I feel bad for even using Dettol wipes when I first got them. It wasn't an OCD thing it is what I would usually do but now I'm worried the stuff on Dettol has made it even worse?

 

They smell really strongly of chemicals/plastic so I think it's ruined now and I'll need to return them somehow. But I'm also scared of returning them because I've used Dettol wipes so when they resell I'm essentially passing on to someone else a product that I've tampered with? But I also feel stuck as I feel like everytime I'm in my new bedroom I'll be anxious and worry whenever I wear new clothes? 

 

I just don't know what to do now I haven't felt this anxious in a long time.

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It is only a piece of furniture so it’s not worth getting upset about.

Your anxiety about returning the furniture is pure OCD. You are using words like ‘tamper’. 

Why not keep the furniture. Put some clothes in it and then wear them.

Do it now. Before the anxiety grows. You can do it. You have done similar things in the past.

Edited by Angst
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55 minutes ago, Gemzi3 said:

Now I feel bad for even using Dettol wipes when I first got them. It wasn't an OCD thing it is what I would usually do but now I'm worried the stuff on Dettol has made it even worse?

Nothing wrong with wiping down new furniture.  Its been in the factory, probably a warehouse, etc.  Its perfectly reasonable and something non-OCD people do to wipe down something like that when the get it home.
 

56 minutes ago, Gemzi3 said:

They smell really strongly of chemicals/plastic so I think it's ruined now and I'll need to return them somehow. But I'm also scared of returning them because I've used Dettol wipes so when they resell I'm essentially passing on to someone else a product that I've tampered with? But I also feel stuck as I feel like everytime I'm in my new bedroom I'll be anxious and worry whenever I wear new clothes? 

You are allowing your OCD to run away with things here, catastrophic thinking for sure.  There is no need to return the furniture, its perfectly fine.  Yes you are feeling anxiety, again, thats real, but that doesn't mean there is a real problem.  To beat the OCD do the "normal" thing despite the anxiety.  Teach your brain not to listen to the false alarms.  Use the furniture and ride out the anxiety.  That will help you overcome OCD.  Yes, it will be unpleasant, but it is better than continuously giving in to OCD, which will only make things worse.  Take a stand here, choose the recovery option here.  Use the dresser, wear your clothes, and live your life.

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You both make sense.

I do after this many years see that.

I still even now struggle with knowing sometimes what's normal and what's OCD. Would a normal person be happy with their new furniture giving off black marks? I don't know. Surely that's not normal for stuff to come off when you wipe?

 

As usual it's never me that I worry about. My worry is then whenever I touch the drawers or wear the clothes when I meet my friends and friends babies I'll be petrified to hold them incase there's toxic paint on me or particles.

I'm actually driving myself mad.  

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All my drawers are solid wood so I don’t know about normality in the case of your drawers. In your situation I would probably give one more quick wipe and then store some cheap T shirts in the drawer to check whether they got stained. Other people might have other approaches.

I think you are catastrophising about the toxicity of any paints. Your extremely exaggerated sense of responsibility has stopped you from either returning the furniture or using the furniture. You have stalemated yourself. If I were you in your predicament I would use the furniture. It would take you out of the impasse.

One of my motives for extreme checking was an exaggerated sense of responsibility in case I unintentionally harmed my neighbours. It is a common theme in OCD checking and contamination. You need to accept the that it’s OCD.

I once spoke to a man in a phone conversation who believed that he had a very contagious disease even though a doctor said that he had not. He isolated himself from all human contact in the belief that any contact would be fatal. What would you recommend that that man should do?

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Of course if a doctor said it was safe then that would be good enough for me.

We also bought a painted grey ladder shelf. Lo and behold we built that today and when finished (no wet Dettol wipes this time) I brushed over it with a dry kitchen towel to get the dust off and what do you know - grey marks on the kitchen roll!

This made me feel better and worse. Better because that was a different company and of its doing that too then maybe there isn't a daily with my mirrored furniture.

Worse because I now have more items I'm worried about ..and if there's paint or fumes leaching off them all the time which could make people ill.

Not sure with painted furniture what's normal now and how I move past it when everytime I clean I'm going to be worried about marks?

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Guest OCDhavenobrain

It is actually quite simplistic. Either you keep obsessing and you will feel bad or you leave it and move on.

When it comes to chemicals they are (sadly) everywhere in today's society.

We have accepted some limited chemicals in today society which are considered safe. One can buy organic stuff but then what will happen to you is that you WILL start obsessing about furnitures on your work or when you sit on the bus and you could end up being afraid of even leaving your house. Accept the chemicals in your life or it will get worse. There is no certainty and there should be no safety for you at the moment, IF you want it to get better

Edited by OCDhavenobrain
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7 hours ago, Gemzi3 said:

I didn't do too well.

Now I feel bad for even using Dettol wipes when I first got them. It wasn't an OCD thing it is what I would usually do but now I'm worried the stuff on Dettol has made it even worse?

Hi Gemzi,

Dettol wipes wont cause any damage or make things worse.

My point is, I just think that it is overkill if that everything you buy needs the Dettol treatment! I know you say it is not an 'OCD  thing', but I would think it potentially is. 

Edited by felix4
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It was more of a normal behaviour for me. Buy something new, wipe it down.

It's only by doing that that I discovered the markings on the drawers and now the new grey ladder shelf.

I still haven't put any clothes away for this reason. I'm honestly not sure where to go from here because if I return them that's a massive hassle and is essentially giving in to OCD. But if I keep them I don't know how I have store clothes when I feel like I can smell chemicals and when I wipe them it's like the paints coming off?

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9 hours ago, Gemzi3 said:

It was more of a normal behaviour for me. Buy something new, wipe it down.

This is a perfectly normal, reasonable behavior.  Lots of people do this.  No problem.
 

12 hours ago, Gemzi3 said:

I brushed over it with a dry kitchen towel to get the dust off and what do you know - grey marks on the kitchen roll!

This is also totally normal, the materials we use to color things don't always adhere 100%, trace amounts can remain that can be washed/wiped off.  If you use older/cheaper printers you'll see this same phenomenon, streaking/smudging of ink etc.  Again, this isn't a big deal.
 

17 hours ago, Gemzi3 said:

My worry is then whenever I touch the drawers or wear the clothes when I meet my friends and friends babies I'll be petrified to hold them incase there's toxic paint on me or particles.

Here is the core problem, you have gotten in to a situation where you have come to believe a grossly exaggerated sense of how the world works and fallen into both exaggerated responsibility and black and white thinking.  

The reality is its simply impossible to live in a completely safe world.  The world is full of risks, we can't avoid that.  Trying to live without risk, to yourself or to others will leave you trapped.  

You express the concern that you'll transfer toxic paint particles to your friends babies.  Ok, thats technically possible, but is it a reasonable worry?  

Lets say you are completely free of toxic paint particles.  Further, lets say you never hold the baby.  Lets say instead, you sit down at the table.  While you are sitting down at the table, you put your purse on the ground.  Ok, now your purse is on the ground.  Because its on the ground an ant that was walking on the ground changes its path.  That ant was carrying a bread crumb.  That bread crumb now catches the eye of a bird.  That bird flies over the table where you are sitting.  While flying, it poops.  That poop lands on the babies head.  Now, instead of a few stray paint particles the babies head is covered with bird poop.  All because you put your purse down.  Does that sound like a ridiculous series of events?  Does that sound extremely unlikely?  Absolutely.  But it COULD happen.  Just about anything COULD happen.  But that doesn't mean the odds are high, that the risk is high.  And so, because the risk is incredibly low, you don't worry about it.  And you SHOULD respond the same way to these worries about toxic paint.  The odds of something remotely bad happening because of it simply from putting a shirt in the draw, wearing the shirt, and then holding the baby are so low that its not even worth considering in the minds of most people.  The difference between you and them is OCD, and OCD triggers false alarms.  For you those false alarms are related to toxic substances, but they are still false alarms.

The anxiety you feel is genuine, the distress it causes you is real, but the source of that anxiety is not.  I used this analogy in another thread, and I think it applies here too.  When a fire alarm goes off, whether its for a real fire or a false alarm or a test, it sounds EXACTLY the same.  The cause of the alarm doesn't change the behavior of the alarm.  Same with OCD.  The anxiety you feel from an OCD intrusive thought is the same as you would feel for a genuine threat.  Which means you can't judge risk based on anxiety alone,  you have to consider other factors, and you have to consider that you KNOW that you are prone to false alarms.

Overcoming OCD requires teaching yourself not to panic over false alarms.  In this situation your false alarm is about spreading dangerous substances to others.  The possibility exists, but the chances are extremely low.  It wouldn't make sense to avoid putting your purse down for fear of starting a chain reaction that leads to a bird pooped baby, it doesn't make sense to march to the beat of a drummer that you know is misleading you.  Given time (and work) your brain will learn to treat these thoughts as unimportant, but you have to challenge OCD when it makes these kinds of demands on you, thats the only path out of the forrest of OCD.

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