Scared of change

[Miaaaaa12]

Hi Im Mia im 16 and I have ocd recently I’ve not had much problems I used to want to make things just right and get very scared and anxious if they weren’t I would think that they would lead to bad things like loosing friends etc. I learnt that I was wrong and the lcd was bullying me to ge into a spiral and the only way I could get out of it is if I believed ocd was controlling me and it was a bully.

 

anyways recently I’ve become much more happier and comfortable but I think a little too comfortable as now I am worried of loosing the happy place i am in now and change taking place. Most of all I am worried of loosing my personality, I would say I’m quite a happy and outgoing person but I have a new constant fear that I am going to become boring and serious. So I’ve been looking up online what determines personality and checking over and over to make sure I can stay the same to reassure myself. It’s is getting very obsessive and the more I did it the more I worry. 

Any advice :)

[Gemma7]

Hi Mia

So all the checking online about personalities is a compulsion that you need to stop. OCD is just trying to get you to be 100% sure of something that it is impossible to be sure of. What you can guarantee is doing all the checking will make you feel a lot worse and make OCD bad again. 

It can be hard when you overcome some OCD problems to not just shift to worrying about something else. What you need to realise, which i think you're beginning to, is that worrying about things doesn't ever help, it only generates more worry. Try focusing more on the present and enjoying yourself now and not focus on what might never happen in the future. Look out for signs of OCD, like anxiety and doubt and fight the urge to buy into the fears with compulsions. Have you had CBT? Have you got any notes you made in the past to refer back to, to remind yourself of the tools you learnt. 

Gemma