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Sophhh

Am struggling on public trans...

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Hey,

So i will just give you some context...

I commute a lot and spend a lot of time on trains and busy areas and i just feel like i cant control my thoughts when on them...my ocd is just hightened (especially on trains) as i am very sensitive to noise and it triggers intrusive thoughts.

Especially when people sniff, cough and sit really close to me i just want to beg them to stop becuz those kind of sounds really trigger me and i dont know how to sit with this. I have tried exposing myself to it and just sitting with the anxiety but i cant help but push the thoughts away which obviously makes it worse.

I usually just wear my headphones and try and block out any noise but everywhere i go there seems to be another trigger. Its like hell for me seeing as my fears are contamination, getting ill and dying and the fear is constant. 

I just don't want to be this easily triggered and i want to not push the thoughts away or sit on the train without covering my face and shifting away from people for the whole trip. Its so draining. I just dont know how.

Im sorry if this doesnt make any sense, i tried explaining as best as possible.

Thank you for all advice given!!!

Soph xxx

 

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What do you think trigger you when someone cough? Are you aware that you are disliking it because of contaminationworries?

Edited by OCDhavenobrain

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1 hour ago, OCDhavenobrain said:

What do you think trigger you when someone cough? Are you aware that you are disliking it because of contaminationworries?

Yes it is triggering because of conamination. I feel like i just dont want to breath in the same air after someone coughs becuz i just panic that it is then contamination. Obviously i know that its totally irrational but i cant not think it.

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Ok, so all of this is just OCD and you are aware of it, that is good. The first step towards recovery. 

You can't stop yourself from thinking it, but you know what you can do? You can force yourself to sit with the anxiety. 

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On 17/07/2019 at 18:05, Sophhh said:

I commute a lot and spend a lot of time on trains and busy areas and i just feel like i cant control my thoughts when on them...my ocd is just hightened (especially on trains) as i am very sensitive to noise and it triggers intrusive thoughts.

Especially when people sniff, cough and sit really close to me i just want to beg them to stop becuz those kind of sounds really trigger me and i dont know how to sit with this. I have tried exposing myself to it and just sitting with the anxiety but i cant help but push the thoughts away which obviously makes it worse.

I usually just wear my headphones and try and block out any noise but everywhere i go there seems to be another trigger. Its like hell for me seeing as my fears are contamination, getting ill and dying and the fear is constant. 

I just don't want to be this easily triggered and i want to not push the thoughts away or sit on the train without covering my face and shifting away from people for the whole trip. Its so draining. I just dont know how

Hello Sophhh,

Much of that does make sense and I can understand how difficult it would be to block out the noises. I guess a few things are going on, the headphone are a form of avoidance (from the noise triggers) and the intrusive thoughts from the noises and sniffles and the people are causing your OCD to catastrophise the feeing of getting ill.   

I won't play pop psychologist by asking where some of those fears originated.  Are you getting any kind of help or support from a mental health professional for this at the moment?

All of that bottom line is absolutely possible to get to that place though Sophhh, one day you will take that journey and be comfortable doing so :thumbup:

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Soph,

I sympathise with what you are going through, I have contamination OCD and one of my fears was touching the hand rails on trains and the underground. If I touched one accidentally I would keep my hand rigid and avoid touching anything until I had washed it. I'm over that now, thanks to CBT (still have plenty of other worries to work through though). The only advice I can give is take the exposures and the anxiety gradually, and build on it when you feel ready. For example when I started I would touch the hand rail just as I was leaving the train. Then after doing that a few times I would hold the hand rail for one stop along the journey, then two, then three etc. It wasn't easy at the time, but now I can travel normally and only think about it occasionally when I remember how much easier travelling is now.

I hope this helps and good luck.

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Thank you all for your advice, @Ashleyand @LeopardM. That does make sense that the headphones are me avoiding the actual problem. Recently I have had to go without them and i find that I do get anxious but I got through it! No i am not currently getting any help but hopefully soon.

And yes that is really good @LeopardM! Im so glad that there is a way to overcome it.

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